Raphael studied her, then closed his eyes. As the door slowly swung shut, a cocoon of energy settled over them, as strong as the heat that had surrounded her in the circle, only this was pure comfort, the warmest, safest times of childhood wrapping around her.
Raphael, being the healer he was, knew what was needed. He opened his arms and she went into them, letting the sobs take her.
WHEN she emerged into the bailey, her wings were working properly again, so she stayed in that form, stretching them out to feel the afternoon sunshine. Someone had brought Dante new sunglasses and a belted half-tunic, and he'd moved to a portion of the parapet shaded by the turret. He didn't look toward her, and though she ached to feel his arms around her, hear his voice, she was glad to have this steadying moment to just look at him. Raphael skirted around her, pressing her shoulder briefly before he approached the vampire, likely to check on his physical status.
She felt her father at her shoulder and looked up at him, giving him a smile. "It turned out to be a beautiful day, didn't it?"
Jonah nodded, looked out at it with her. "You're all right?" he asked.
"Yes." She leaned against his side, putting her temple on his shoulder, letting his arm hold her up. White clouds floated past. "The beauty helps, doesn't it? Helps you remember that light and dark are a balance."
He put his fingers beneath her chin. "Yes. And when a male is blessed with a daughter and mate like I have, the light is strong enough to blind him."
She held on to this second, feeling the beauty of the day, his love, Dante's existence and the potential for all of it wrap around her, bolstering her. "I'd like to take him to Eden," she said at last. "May I, for just a little while? He can bathe there and recuperate. I'd intended to ask your permission to take him there earlier, but things got a little derailed." She attempted a smile and failed. "The whole abduction and fight for his life thing."
Jonah's dark eyes roved over her face. Unlike him or even Dante, she'd never be able to hide her feelings behind an impassive mask. She needed to touch Dante, feel that he was alive, back here with her. She needed to be with him without others.
Some of the happiest days of her childhood had been in Eden, playing with the animals and on the grass with her parents. There'd been long afternoons with the three of them napping there, her sandwiched between them, her father's wing stretched over them both, curved around Anna's back like a blanket. Their soft even breath, the rush of the water. It was Paradise. Deep in their ancestral subconscious, all humans remembered it, a dream they all hoped hadn't been one.
Though she could tell Jonah understood, he wasn't entirely placid. There were things they needed to resolve between them. He was probably going to take her to task for taking the lead the way she had, admonish her for risking herself as always . . .
Instead, he turned and placed his hands on her shoulders as she hovered before him, her wings holding her aloft. "You are an angel of these Heavens, just as I am. You need no one's permission to go to Eden. You did what every parent hopes and fears today, Seabird. You surpassed me."
Unbidden, tears returned. As he had when she was little and had scrapes, he plucked a feather, dabbed it like a handkerchief at the corners of her eyes. "Now, enough of that," he said gruffly. "I need to let your mother know you're all right."
"That we're all right." She sniffled and caught his wrist brace, the heel of her palm resting on his. "She worries more about you than she does me. She knows you're far more likely to get into trouble."
His arms and wings closed around her, flooding her with reassurance. Things had changed between them in the past several days, and they could never go back. They would both mourn that, but at the same time, she knew it was all right. Everything would be as it should be.
Pulling away at last, she held on to his hand an extra moment then turned, moving to the parapets where Dante stood facing Raphael. The healer sat upon the parapet with his amused expression back in place.
"He's not letting me touch him," he explained, "But he's moving well enough. His vampire constitution will heal him. He just needs a bath, desperately. After that, I'd recommend a muscle-deep attitude massage."
"Thank you, Raphael." She wanted to smile, but now that she was close to Dante, she couldn't. She could barely breathe. As she turned to face her vampire, the restraint on her frayed emotions nearly crumbled. She'd almost lost him. More than that, she knew how his soul-deep rage at being imprisoned and helpless had nearly consumed what was left of his tattered soul. But it hadn't.
He was strangely blank to her right now, but she was certain her belief in that wasn't resting on hope alone. Not trusting herself to say or do anything else, or think about the possibility of rebuff, she glided forward. Sliding her arms around his waist, palms traveling up his back, she hooked his shoulders. She could fly weights greater than her own with her wings for a short distance, but her arm strength needed help.
I'm taking you somewhere to clean up. Can you put your arms around me?
She closed her eyes as his arms slid over her shoulders, hands under her wings, mostly bare legs and feet capturing her tail to steady their passage as she went aloft. Even though he was covered with blood and filth, there was the flutter of dark hair against her lips, the muscles in his body shifting against hers. It was him, and he was alive.
The trip to Eden was a short one, and they didn't speak, though she sensed him gazing around, taking in the magnificent silver spires of the Citadel they'd just left, the sight of other angels in the sky going about their daily business.
Unlike earthly rainbows, Eden's had a glittering substance to it that coated her skin as she passed through it. She remembered times she'd played in the rainbow, positioning herself so those five colors striped one of her wings. She'd giggled, asking Jonah to make it permanent. Those colors passed over Dante's face, highlighting the harsh planes, the set of his mouth.
She landed them near the river. If they'd come a day or so ago, she might have dropped him in for fun. Right now, her emotions had built to the point she could barely speak. It was hard enough to let him go, move back and transform to her human form so her bare toes could grip the soft grass. She discarded the bra, leaving her skin free to feel the soft touch of Eden's breeze and gentle sun.
All she wanted to do was run to him, embrace him, but she couldn't tell by sorting his emotions what he wanted. He moved away from her after they landed, walked to the water's edge to stand under the canopy of a shade tree and stared all around him. She couldn't blame him. She'd grown up an angel, used to seeing marvelous sights, but there was still something about Eden. It contained peace, a quietness of the soul that was contagious while that soul rested within its embrace.
Eden's many magics included this blissful isolation. There might be others here now, but they would not be seen unless the powers that drifted through here knew a soul needed someone else's presence. Now Dante watched a pair of deer move to the water's edge and drink, gazing at him curiously before drifting on. They passed so close he could touch the deer's flank. He lifted a hand as if he intended to do just that, but then his gaze lighted on the blood staining him, and he closed it into a fist.
She couldn't bear it. She knew she should give him a few seconds, but instead she walked down to the water's edge where he stood. Under his silent gaze, she unbelted the tunic around his waist. There was a small pouch hanging from the belt, and when she removed it, the contents were lumpy, hard. When she glanced up at his face, he shook his head, apparently not interested in explaining, so she set it aside with the clothing.
Interlacing her fingers with his, she caressed his knuckles, absorbed the warmth of his palm. She'd intended to lead him to the water, but instead, she just stood there, holding that one hand, staring at it as the tears ran down her face.
His arm slid around her shoulders slowly. As it tightened, she took one hesitant step in, then another, her movements jerky from the emotions gripping her. Then she was against his chest, her face pressed
into his throat, and his hand spread out on her back, a cautious stroke. Reassurance, affection, it was all so new to him, but she didn't care. If anything, it made his stilted attempts all the more precious to her, because she knew he did nothing except that he wanted to do it.
Why are you crying, merangel? I am free.
Because I was afraid I was going to lose you. And I've only had you a few days.
That should have made me much easier to forget if the Fen had killed me.
He handled terrible things so matter-of-factly. She squeezed her eyes shut, let the horror of his words pass. Then she spoke into his skin, because she liked how she could move her lips against him that way. "So I'd be easy for you to forget, too. There are many females in the world, Dante. A lot of them will be prettier, or more like you." She thought of Lady Lyssa's beauty, and a legion of other faceless vampire women, just as breathtaking. "I'm only going to have you a short time."
His crimson gaze was intent on her face as he took her shoulders and held her away from him. Sitting down on the bank, he drew her down beside him, his brow creased in thought. "You are not as clever as I thought you were, Alexis."
Stung, she pulled back, but he wouldn't let her go. "The Fen, though they are not as simple as I thought, are still simple. And yet they saw what you do not."