Uncivilized (Uncivilized 1)

"You might need to give him some time though. Some space. He's very angry with you for taking him away from the Caraicans. His plan is still to return."

Randall's smile fades a little. "I understand. I won't pressure him."

"That would be good. He can be a very stubborn man," I say with a smile.

"Tonight will be very casual. I'm having my niece and nephew over. They're close to Zach's age, and I figured it would be nice for him to have some friends he can pal around with."

"Sounds lovely," I tell him. "Now, I think I'm going to take a shower, if you don't mind, and then we'll just see you for dinner at seven."

"Thank you, Dr. Reed," Randall says, his voice thick with emotion. "For bringing my boy home."

"You're welcome," I tell him, but honestly, he's wrong to think that Zach has come home.

Chapter 13

Zach

A knock sounds softly on a side door in my room that I had noticed earlier but didn't pay any mind. I open it hesitantly and see Moira standing there. We're due to go down to dinner in about fifteen minutes. I'm not surprised to see her, but I am surprised she's at this side door, not understanding where she came from.

"Looks like our rooms connect," Moira says by way of explanation and points back into the bedroom I can now see over her shoulder.

"Interesting," I say out loud, even as my thoughts turn toward the possibility of sneaking into her room tonight.

Fuck, I'm going crazy with wanting this woman, and not exactly even sure if I'd be welcomed into her body again. I was so confused and angry over her denial of me that I wanted nothing to do with her.

That lasted all of about five minutes.

Then it was back to this insane, unmitigated craving I have for her, and I had to argue with myself for another three days that it was foolish to even pursue anything further. We are too different. I can't afford to lose control. She wants things of me I can't give.

I still have no more clarity on the issue.

Moira walks past me into my room. I see she's put on a white skirt that hugs her hips and stops just above her knees. She paired it with a light blue, sleeveless top so I can see the hint of freckles on her shoulders. As is normally her custom, her hair is brilliantly long and loose and I'm dying to run my fingers through it.

Preferably with her bent over before me and fucking her from behind.

But no, that's not quite true. Not preferably. The minute Moira told me the other day she wanted to take me in her mouth, I've been obsessing about that. I immediately shut that notion down because I didn't think I would be able to handle it and not lose control with her. But the prospect of sinking my fingers into her hair, holding her face still while I pumped in and out of her mouth... yeah, okay. Getting an erection and need to think of something else.

"How old are you, Moira?" I ask her, as it's something I've been curious about.

She walks over to my bed and sits down on the edge. Laughing lightly, she says, "Cultural lesson number one when it comes to women... never ask them their age."

I can't help the smile that pops back at her. "Oh, yeah. Why is that?"

"Because modern women are sensitive to aging. A direct question is apparently interpreted to mean, 'You look old and haggard. Maybe you should consider Botox.'"

"What's Botox?" I ask in confusion.

Moira giggles and shakes her head with laughing eyes. "It's something a woman does to make herself look young and pretty. But to answer your question, I'm twenty-eight."

"Older than me by three years," I muse out loud.

"You missed a prime opportunity," she teases as she stands from the bed. "You should have said, 'Moira, you don't look a day over twenty-one. You are so youthful and beautiful, you'll never need Botox.'"

I can't help but smirk at her. "You don't need me to tell you that. You know that already."

Coming to stand before me, Moira pats my forearm. "See, that's just it, Zach. Women are insecure creatures at times. We absolutely need to hear that."

"Not you," I scoff. "You are the most confident woman I've ever known."

"Your experience is with Caraican women," she points out. "Of course, I'm the most confident woman you've ever known."

"I've met plenty of other women over the last few weeks. Observed even more. Trust me; no one holds a candle to you in that respect."

"But yet it's a turn off for you," she says quietly, and her eyes cast downward.

I blink at her in surprise, not just by her words, but by the way she drops her gaze. So not the confident Moira I know. "It's not a turn off."

"No?" she asks dubiously but with a hint of challenge as she raises her face upward. "You haven't spoken to me in several days. You don't want me unless you can put me on bended knee. I'm not Tukaba, and I never will be."

Reaching out, I take a lock of her silky hair in my hand, absently rubbing the softness between my fingers. I study it carefully, watching the way the light dances on it. When I raise my eyes to her, I say, "Don't ever think I don't want you, Moira. I'm just not sure I can have you and not lose myself along the way."

"Zach... I don't want you to lose yourself. And I don't ever want you to be anyone other than your true self. Please don't think that."

I release her hair and step back. "I know. But I also know that you will never be the woman that is going to bend to me completely. If you don't bend, then my existence is wrong. I don't know any other way."

"That's not true," Moira says quickly and reaches out to take my hand. Her fingers lace in between mine. "You keep your ways, Zach. But you can learn new ways too, if you want. That's how you should treat everything in life."

I'm silent for a moment as I look at our fingers intertwined. Her touch is warm and caring, and it gives me a measure of peace. "I don't want to hurt you," I tell her honestly. "I always feel like I'm getting ready to lose control when I'm with you. I want to possess you so thoroughly, and I'm afraid I might hurt you in the process."

"But you haven't yet," she assures me.

"Because I was in control the entire time, Moira. If I give that up, who will protect you from me?"

Raising our joined hands up, Moira kisses my knuckles so sweetly. "You won't hurt me. I trust you. But let's talk about this after dinner... later tonight. They're expecting us now."

I nod at her, and she releases my hand. Heading toward my door that opens to the hallway, Moira looks back at me. "And Zach... I don't think Randall should know about us. I mean, about how close we've come... in an intimate way."

"I prefer him not know anything about me at all, so you don't have to worry about me sharing."

"It's just... what I did... having sex with you. It's inappropriate from a standpoint of where Randall is coming from. He wouldn't understand."

I smile at her. "Our secret isn't going anywhere. So don't worry."

She breathes out a sigh of relief and smiles. "Thank you."

When we reach the bottom of the stairs, Sam is waiting for us. "Everyone is in the library if you'd like to join them for a pre-dinner drink."

I give the man a nod and motion for Moira to precede me. I follow her in, steeling myself against the futility of this evening. I don't want to know this Randall Cannon. I want to go home... back to Brazil, and back to my people.

Except, for the first time since I've thought of home, I'll admit that the thought of leaving Moira causes a tightness to form in my chest. While I have no clue where our relationship is headed, I'm most certain I'm not ready to be parted from her yet.

Moira enters into a set of open double doors and when I follow, I see Randall standing there with a man and a woman that look roughly my age. Both of them are tall and have golden blond hair. The man wears his in a similar hair length to mine, and the woman's hair is long but wrapped up in a knot at the back of her head. She's quite beautiful actually, with wide, blue eyes and delicate features.

"Ah, there you are," Randall booms and, with a beckoning arm, he says, "Come in. Come in. I want to introduce you to my niece and nephew, Cara and Clint Cannon."

I follow Moira in, keeping slightly behind her. She smiles at the man and woman and holds her hand out to each in turn for them to shake.

"Hi. I'm Moira," she says. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

She then steps aside, so I can shake their hands. Clint steps forward and gives my hand a mighty pump. With a dazzling, white smile, he says, "It's so good to meet you, Zach. Uncle Randall has told us all about you. We're going to have so much fun together this summer."

I don't know what to say to that because Moira said we were leaving in two days, so I just give him a halfhearted smile and turn to the woman.

I hold my hand out to her, but she steps forward and wraps her bare arms around my neck, pulling her body in flush against mine. She gives me a tight hug, pressing her pelvis against mine, which stuns me. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Zach."

She releases me slowly and looks at me intently. "My, my... Uncle Randall... you didn't tell me how gorgeous Zach is. Such secrets."