Grind (Cal and Macy's Story 2)

Not the true woman.

So I continue to fuck her and with just a few deep thrusts, her body is clamping down tight against me and she starts to shudder in climax. Tears pool and leak from her eyes as she wails in ecstasy.

I slam into her, over and over again, and just as her own quaking starts to calm, I grit my teeth and let the air hiss out as I come inside of her. I shoot almost viciously into her pussy, shuddering hard with the initial wave, and then almost as quickly, my body comes to a quiet halt.

I'm absolutely empty of body and soul in this moment, and part of the reason is that I may have enjoyed that just a little too much. Even as I hated it.

It's the first time ever since I fucked Matt's wife that I've equated shame and sex together.

Macy touches a tentative hand to my cheek, and I resist the need to give her a reassuring smile. Instead, I pull out of her, taking her by the hand and urging her off the bed. When she's on her feet, I let her go, turning to grab my clothes. I don't spare the other couple, who are lying wrapped up in each other's arms on the floor, a glance.

Macy is utterly silent as she grabs her dress and pulls it over her in quick, jerky motions. I see the window in the wall is devoid of any onlookers, and that makes me feel better. Because I know without a doubt that there is no joy or flushed pleasure on my face right now.

Once we're both dressed, I head toward the door to leave without a word to anyone. The bodyguard murmurs, "Have a good evening," as we exit. I turn down the hall, Macy hot on my heels.

I keep waiting for anger to start bubbling hot within me, but all I can feel in this moment is confusion and a sick sort of disappointment over where Macy and I stand. She follows behind me, although I don't expect her to. I can honestly say if she wanted to stay here, I don't think I'd argue the point at all.

Down the hallway, through the massive lobby area that is still crammed full of people sipping at their cocktails, and right out the front double doors.

When my foot hits the graveled driveway at the bottom step, Macy reaches out and grabs my wrist.

"Cal, wait," she says determinedly.

I turn quickly and take a step right up into her. Leaning down, I growl, "I'm never doing that with you again."

My words are vicious and laced with disdain. Her eyes cloud over and just before they lower to the ground, I see self-loathing within her crystal irises. It punches me in the gut, knowing that my words are causing her shame, but it doesn't stop me from saying, "I tried that once for you, but never again. That's not me. It will never be me."

She doesn't look back up at me but gives a resolute nod. "I'm sorry," she whispers.

And damn... that makes me feel like shit. I take her hand and give it a tug as I turn toward the grassy parking lot to the west side of the mansion. "Come on," I tell her gruffly. "I'll give you a ride home."

I'm stunned when she pulls away from me and now her eyes are staring at me in defiance, her chin raised stubbornly. "No, thank you."

"Then I'll walk you to your car," I say in exasperation.

"I'm staying," she says quietly.

"What?"

"I get that this isn't you," she says softly. "But sadly... this is me. This is all I'm good for."

My stomach cramps so viciously, I almost bend over to ease the pain of it. This beautiful, broken woman truly believes that this is all she's meant to be. She's not choosing to stay here because she wants to, but because she believes she's not worthy to walk the path I'm offering her.

"Yeah, fuck that," I growl, grabbing her by the elbow. I turn and start pulling her along with me toward my car. "You're leaving and that's that."

I have no clue where we stand. I have no clue what tomorrow is going to bring. All I know are these few truths.

I'm never sharing Macy Carrington again.

I'm sure as hell not leaving her to believe that this is all that she's destined for.

And fuck if I'm going to let her become her own worst enemy.

Game on.

I have a woman to save.

Chapter 16

From the Diary of Macy Carrington: Dear Diary, I fucked up.

Big time.

And yet, I couldn't help myself.

I am a disaster. Cal is going to get hurt, and yet, I can't give him up. Thankfully, I haven't pushed him away yet, although I'm waiting for him to come to his senses any day now.

Selfishly yours, Macy

Chapter 17

I check my phone again, seeing if Macy texted me back.

Not a fucking word and it's making me cranky.

It goes without saying I've been on edge since our time together at Voyeur last weekend. That surge of anger I was expecting never came. Instead, I was filled with frustration and unease as I drove home alone. While Macy never attempted to go back in to the mansion, she insisted on going home in the limousine she had hired, and I didn't quibble. It was probably best to put some distance between us anyway since things were so... weird.

We both stayed silent all weekend, right on into the work week, neither one of us having the guts to reach out to the other. But when I woke up this Friday morning, I was determined. Before I even rolled out of bed, I grabbed my phone from the nightstand and sent her a quick text.

Dinner tonight. I'll pick you up at seven.

I didn't say anything else, but I hoped she understood the further implication. That we'd be spending all night together. It was my due. A matter of right. She owed it to me after what I gave her, and it would fulfill our original bargain.

But she hasn't texted me back, and I have no clue if she'll be at her apartment when I ring the doorbell.

I tuck my phone back into my breast pocket and push up out of my office chair. I've got a few more hours of work before the day is over and the weekend officially starts, but I can't concentrate on it for shit. So I decide to head down to Mac's office and see what she's up to. I haven't seen her in a few days, and while I certainly can't bring Macy up in casual conversation, maybe she'll drop me a breadcrumb or something.

It still chafes at me that I have to keep my relationship with Macy--if that's what you call this fiasco--from my best friend. But I have to respect Macy's wishes at this point, and I'm still bolstered by Matt's confidence in me that I'm good for that maddening wench.

Mac's door is open and I see her head bent over her laptop, typing away furiously. I give a sharp rap on the door casing as I walk in and she looks up at me, her face awash in pained concentration. But then a welcoming smile graces her lips, and she actually pushes the laptop away from her as I enter her office.

"What's up?" she asks brightly. "You've been a busy man last several days. Haven't seen hide or hair of you."

"Same shit, different day," I say with a sigh as I set down in one of her guest chairs.

"Got Macy's case all wrapped up?" she asks with a cute head tilt.

Mac knew that I had the case dismissed, something she learned from a quick email I had sent her before I boarded the plane from Utah to New York. I told her just the basics... that I had found out the case was a scam and it was a piece of cake to handle.

"Yeah... dismissal's been filed," I tell her.

Mac reaches into her purse and pulls out an envelope. As she hands it across the desk, she says, "Perfect timing. I had just had lunch with Macy. She asked me to give this to you."

My eyebrows rise in surprise as I gingerly take the envelope. "What is it?"

"A check... for five thousand dollars," Macy says with a smile. "Your legal fee."

I immediately push the envelope back toward her before she can release it. "I don't want this."

Mac engages in a little struggle with me by shoving it harder into my hand, even as her own eyebrows rise in shock. "Why the hell not? It's your fee. You earned it."

"I did a favor for your friend," I say as I push back, the envelope crumpling between us.

"No way," Mac says while shaking her head. "I never intended for you to represent her for free. We have a business to run."

She abruptly lets go of the envelope, and I'm left holding it like it's a slimy worm.

"Mac," I say gently. "It really wasn't a big deal. Just consider it a favor... please."

"Nope," she says matter-of-factly. "If you've got a problem with it, you take it up with Macy. She was emphatic that you get paid for your services."

Anger surges through me, that Macy would even think to try to pay me for what I did. Didn't she know that it was absolutely my pleasure to help her out of a sticky situation? Didn't she understand that I had a measure of care for her, regardless if she's only in it for some dirty, hard-core fucking?

This, coupled with my frustration that she hasn't texted me back to confirm our date tonight, has me on the edge and threatening to explode. Which is so not me. I'm the laid-back variety, calm to my core.

Apparently, that's changed since I got in deep with Macy Carrington.

Crumpling the envelope in my hand, I stand from the chair and turn away from Mac. I walk away without another word, which is completely uncharacteristic of me. In the two years we've been practicing law together, I realize that Mac has never seen my temper... largely because it's non-existent.

When I reach her door, her voice calls out to me. "Are you okay?"

"Fine," I mutter as I exit and continue down the hallway.