Hook looks at me and I don’t like how empty his dark eyes are. I don’t like that he’s closing himself off from me. I won’t allow it.
I cross to him and stop just short of touching him. The temptation rises to demand an explanation, to push him to let me in, but I change course at last moment. Hook will tell me when he’s ready. I have to believe that.
So I jerk my chin toward the bathroom. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”
“You don’t have to.” He still doesn’t sound like himself.
“I know.” I walk into the bathroom, holding my breath until I hear him following. It takes a few seconds to get the shower going and then I return to find him reaching for the buttons of his shirt with hands that shake. “Let me.”
“Tink.”
“Let me,” I repeat.
He finally drops his hands and I waste no time working the buttons free. His shirt is tacky with blood and it clings to his skin as I peel it off his body. He shudders out a breath. “You’re not going to ask me what happened?”
“You’ll tell me when you’re ready.” I finish wrestling his shirt off his arms and reach for his pants.
“I can handle this bit.” He gets his pants off quickly enough and tosses them on top of the shirt. Hook hesitates, something almost vulnerable crossing his face. “Join me?”
Any other time, I’d tell him to shower by himself because I have work to finish, but this isn’t any other time. He needs me right now, and the work can wait a bit longer. “Sure.” I strip quickly and follow him into the shower.
Hook heads directly into the water and ducks his head under the spray. I hang back and watch the water run red. Even without his clothes, there’s so much blood. I doubt the person it belongs to is still among the living.
The thought should probably bother me. A normal woman would have questions and demands for answers if her husband came home like this. She might be packing her bags right now and calling the cops.
The only thing I can think of is how hurt he looks. He wouldn’t take a life unless there was no other recourse left to him. I might doubt many things in my life, but I will never doubt that. I will never doubt him.
He scrubs his skin, over and over again, and the aching in my heart gets more intense. “Let me do your back.”
It’s only when he turns from me that he speaks. “It was a challenge in a roundabout way. Trip went after Nigel’s girlfriend.”
I stop scrubbing his back. “Is Laura okay?”
“Yes. She held him off and made enough of a racket that Nigel got there before Trip did more than split her lip.” His shoulders shift under my hands. “I handled the rest.”
I slip my arms around him and hug his back. It’s only this close that I realize little shakes are working through his body. “You did what you had to do.”
“I know.” He takes a big breath and an even longer exhale. “I’m fine.”
“It’s okay if you’re not.”
Hook shifts and turns in my arms. I look up to find the tiniest bit of mirth in his dark eyes. “I half expected you to kick my ass over this.”
That stings a little, but I push the emotional reaction away. Even after months together, we’re still figuring each other out. We each have our histories and old wounds, and that means sometimes we unintentionally prod at them in each other. Sometimes it’s intentional because we’re both a little bit of an asshole.
I cup his face, his beard tickling my palms. “Being the head of the territory means sometimes you have to do fucked up shit. I can admit that I don’t like it while still understanding that days like today are what keep us safe the rest of the time.” I shift my hands to the back of his neck. “You made an example of him.”
It’s not a question, but he answers it all the same. “I did.”
“Then the next person who comes after one of ours might hesitate.” I tug him down until his forehead is pressed against mine. “I am sorry you have to bear the burden of it.”
“It’s what I signed up for.”
Yes, it is. But not because he wanted the power. Because he had no other option, not if he wanted to keep the people he cared about safe. “That doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt you.”
His exhale ghosts across my lips. “No. It doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.” Hook strokes his hands down my body to rest on my hips. “I need…”
I’m already nodding. “Yes.”
He lifts his head enough to smirk at me, though it’s still a ghostly impression of his usual arrogance. “You didn’t even wait for me to finish that sentence.”