“Does anything mean anything?” she asked.
“Of course not,” he smiled. There was nothing warm about it. “You know me, I’m only ever about the game. Only good for short-term, meaningless...”
She chilled. He was talking about sex now. About them. “You d-d-don’t think you’re being a bit hard on yourself? If you...”
His nostrils thinned. “I’m not the right guy for any woman for long. You know this.” His voice hardened. “You’ve told me.”
She shook her head. “You’ve told me.” Her heart split. He didn’t believe in himself.
“Your team mate’s girl? You chose someone you knew you c-couldn’t have.” She realized it now. “You knew it couldn’t work.” In that weird way, he’d kept himself safe. “Now, if anyone gets too c-c-close, you push them away.” He was pushing her away. “Because you don’t believe you d-deserve... You let them down before they have a chance to reject you.”
She’d been wrong about him. It wasn’t that he didn’t give a damn about what anyone thought of him. Quite the opposite. He cared deeply about the opinions of those who mattered most to him. Connor especially. His friends. And his parents. Deny it he might, but they still hurt him.
And with women? He never let one get close enough.
She looked at him, aloof, silent. He’d totally iced over. Shutting her out. The slicing away had started. And there’d be no coming back for her. For them. She knew it.
“We survived the party,” he eventually said in a remote voice. “Connor has complete control. Father has retired. It’s probably time for us to end this.”
“So we’re no longer engaged?” she asked.
He said nothing.
“And we’re no longer fucking?” Deliberately she used the crude word. Trying to force him into revealing some kind of emotion.
But this was Logan Hughes. Swear words would never shock him.
He stood unmoved.
“You don’t want m-m-me anymore?” She was dangerously close to cracking.
“I don’t have relationships that last,” he said determinedly. “I’m too used to getting my own way. You said it yourself, too spoilt. Too selfish—”
“Too scared.”
That silenced him.
She walked up to him, suddenly past fear herself. “Then what was it you ‘loved’ last night, Logan?”
He didn’t even seem to be breathing.
“Just the sex? M-m-me m-moaning?” She shook her head. “You’re so pathetic.” Hurt howled through her the way the wind had scoured the snow from those mountains.
He was as bad as Bryce. Worse than Bryce. Because he’d made her open up to him totally. He’d made her believe in herself. Made her believe in him.
“You thrive on a challenge. And that’s what I was. The woman who didn’t want to want you. So you m-made me want you. You made me want you m-more than I’ve ever wanted any other man. You won. But now, where’s the challenge?” She flicked her fingers in his face, let them spread to show nothing but air. “G-g-gone. You’ve lost interest. You need some other challenge to go conquer. So shallow. So unfulfilled. But the thing is... you know there’s something m-missing.”
His gaze shot to hers. She saw the banked anger, like blue flames. She wanted to make it explode. He’d yelled at his sister, why wasn’t he yelling at her?
“Are you so afraid of failure, you’ll resist trying something in case you can’t make a success of it?” She goaded. “You’re not that much of a risk-taker at all. You’re not reckless where it really c-counts. You won’t risk your heart. And that restlessness will always be with you. You’re never going to be satisfied. You can be as gluttonous as you want, screw as many women as you can, but you’ll always hunger. It’ll never be enough. There’s a hole inside you that nothing can f-fill.”
“Don’t think you can save me, Min,” he said roughly. “There’s nothing to save here. You don’t want to stay with me, trust me on that.”
“You don’t trust yourself. You have no faith in yourself,” she spat at him. Furious with him. Fighting for him. “Of all the things to believe about you Logan, only you b-b-believe the worst.”
He shook his head. “Stop thinking you can fix me.”
“I know people can’t fix each other. But people can support each other. Love each other. But you have to let them. There’s nothing I can do to make you happy Logan. There’s nothing anyone can do to make you happy. Unless you let them.” She looked at him sadly. “But you’ve already made the d-decision. You think you’re not worthy. You think you’ll fail at it. And so you do.”
He looked down, hiding that beautiful blue from her.
“Where will you go?” he asked.
That was it? He wasn’t even going to try to engage? Of course he wasn’t. “Somewhere.”
“There are paparazzi still outside the building. You’ll need somewhere safe—”
“Don’t worry your p-p-pretty head about that now, Logan.” She turned. “I’ll be fine.”
“Min.” He suddenly grabbed her wrist.
Her skin sizzled, her silly heart leapt.
“Let me go,” she whispered.
She didn’t mean it. She wanted him to pull her to him. Tell her he was sorry, that he wanted this to work. That he’d try.... because what he loved wasn’t ‘this’, but her.
But that only happened in Hollywood fantasies.
And this was just an ordinary day for him. And a nightmare for her.
His eyes burned into her for a prolonged, pained moment.
“Pack your things,” he said, suddenly releasing her. “I’ll get Ed, he’ll escort you where ever you want to go.”
She didn’t even get the satisfaction of slamming the door.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
#NoHeating
Her apartment was freezing and in the three days during which she’d hid inside, it hadn’t gotten any warmer. She sat at her computer but didn’t turn it on. She wasn’t doing it to herself. Seeing those pictures? That whole online world of gossip?
But she was going to have to leave her apartment soon, she was all out of ice-cream.
She jumped as her phone rang, but her pulse settled as she read the caller display. It wasn’t him. It was never going to be him.
“Hi B-B-Blake.”
“Hey Min.” Her first and favorite client answered. “ You’ve been hard to get hold of lately. I was worried,” Blake said.
Min almost smiled. He was concerned for her? That was sweet.
“But then I saw you had happy news of your own,” he added.
Her momentarily lifted spirits crashed again. “Uh, yeah.”
“It’s fantastic. And I guess it makes things a bit easier, knowing you’re going to be busy with your own wedding and all.”
Makes what things easier? Not trusting her voice, Min waited.
“Uh, look, Sabrina’s going to take over the social media stuff for me.” He muttered awkwardly.
“That m-makes a lot of sense,” Min said, trying to keep it together.
“I really appreciate the work you did for me... I keep telling everyone to hire you, but you’re probably gonna scale back now, I guess.”
Guessing wrong. But she wasn’t going to correct him.
“Thank you. I liked working with you.” She really had. “But Sabrina’s right. She’s onto it.”
“She’s amazing,” he sighed. “I’m so lucky.”
“You sure are,” Min smiled. “Now don’t worry at all,” she said smoothly. “I’ll send you the final account later today. Just p-promise to stay in touch, okay?”
“Sure thing. Thanks Min.”
Min rang off, knowing he probably wouldn’t.
Not only had she lost her heart, and her apartment. Her career was in tatters too. She was hemorrhaging the few clients she had. The only thing to do was leave town and start over completely. She could hear her mother’s words already.
I told you so.
But despite that one mamm
oth mistake, she was good at what she did. She could succeed at it again. Or something again. She’d leave New York, find a new place, and new job.
Tomorrow.
She’d just have the night to cry first.
Min put her phone down and stared at her hand. She still had his big fat real diamond to prove their big fat fake engagement. She still hadn’t taken it off because she was so damn pathetic.
Well it was beyond time to pull it together. She’d get the ring back to him. Then get the hell out of this town. And she’d start over.
She wiggled her finger so the diamond caught the light. It wasn’t like she could send it by courier, it was probably worth more than her apartment. And there was no way she was returning it in person.
She was never seeing him again.
So how to get it back to him safely? She couldn’t go to his building. That creep photo guy had been past her window a couple times, they might still be at his place too. And she had no idea where any of his friends lived.
Except Rocco. That guy had a hotel.
And if Logan trusted Rocco to take care of his sister, he’d trust him to take care of this ring. She could go to Rocco’s hotel, give the ring to him and get out of there.
Sixteen hours later, she felt like a deranged person standing in the lobby of the stylish hotel. Only now did she realize the problem with the plan. She could hardly leave it at reception, but she didn’t want to have to go over there and ask the receptionist to call Rocco down. She didn’t want to see any of Logan’s friends. Didn’t want anyone to see her. And as it was, she thought there might be one of those horrible photographers out there.
“Min?”