Own My Soul (Sixty Days 3)

He sat back in his chair with a grin on his face. “I played it very loyal. Said I need answers and need to know what’s on the cards going forward. Said you’ve been wired and holding back in a shit ton of ways this past while and I wanted done with it.” He paused. “Then said I didn’t deserve a bash around the temple and I’d have let him in quite happily without the force.”

Part of me wondered whether there was some truth in that final statement. If Drake had in fact turned up with smiles and handshakes and demanded access to Paige through Eric, whether he’d have opened the doors willingly and handed her over.

But now wasn’t the time to be thinking about that.

“You need to get to his location,” I reiterated. “Whatever you need to say or do in order to get there, is a must as it stands now.”

He nodded. “I know. I get it.”

I hoped he did.

I hoped he got how intense the upcoming environment was going to be alongside a guy who was trying to maintain profits on a business he had no genuine handle on and hadn’t for several years.

“I’ll make sure she’s ok,” Eric said. “When I get there, I mean. I’ll make sure she’s doing ok. My future sister-in-law, after all.”

I didn’t laugh. I couldn’t laugh.

My stomach lurched all over again.

“I just want her away safely from Drake.”

“Yeah, and safely up the aisle with you. Sure thing.”

The thought of walking up the aisle to waiting commitment made me feel physically sick. I’d given so much of my attention way back when to the prospect of taking a girl up the aisle and becoming my other half for all time. So much of my attention to giving my permanent committal to someone I believed was the person to be with me from young until old, for richer and poorer.

I’d loved a girl that much. Loved her with everything. Loved her with all of me.

And she’d made me feel a fool for the rest of my life on the back of it.

I forced down a retch as Eric stared at me across the table.

“You’ve always been so held back in your shit from all those years ago,” he said out loud. “You really do need to open yourself up if this is a girl who’s gonna change everything for you.”

“Squishy love?” I grunted. “Sure, yes. I need to hold back such squishy love.”

“I’m serious,” he said. “Tell me, is your thing for Miss Emmerson really the same kind of love stuff you had going all those years ago for your first actual lover? What was her name again?”

And that’s when I had to be honest. On some level I had to be honest.

My throat was clamped up and my gullet was still dry and wanting to hold back everything truthful. My confessions felt like lumps of crap on a tight road, but I forced them out. I really fucking forced them out.

“I have feelings,” I told him. “I have feelings for Paige Emmerson that mean a lot. I think that’s likely… more…”

“Love?”

I managed a nod. “I care for her.”

“Love her?”

How I wished I could say it. Love.

“You’re going to take serious care of her when you get into Drake’s place, yes? Sister-in-law or not?” I prompted.

His nod was strong. “Hell yeah, if she’s my future sister-in-law, I’ll be giving her the family treatment, I’m telling you. Just admit it.”

Yet still I couldn’t.

I couldn’t admit it.

He was still staring over at me as his handset pinged again. He read it through before speaking, then mumbled out the words from Drake as I forced myself to stay calm.

“He said I did need the battering along with the rest of our team, and I should have learned my lesson from it. He says there are plenty of questions for him to answer, but he needs to be assured I’m turning my back on you, then he’ll talk.” He paused as another buzz of words came through. “He said he’ll be needing some assistance going forward if I can assure him my priorities are aligned with his.”

“So say it,” I told him. “Assure him your priorities are aligned and get him talking.”

I watched Eric’s fingers in a blur, responding. There were only a few moments of total silence before another buzz of response came through in return.

“He said he’ll call later today,” Eric said. “And he’ll check things out and demand some privacy and commitment on my part.”

“Good,” I said. “Then we’d better wrap you up here and ship you on out in his general direction.”

“And you?” Eric quizzed. “You really going to cause all the trouble you were talking about in the meantime? You really going to send out that message?”

I couldn’t hold back the smirk on that front.