“No wonder you got yourself into Logan’s shirt,” she laughed. “You look amazing in that dress, sweetheart.”
“Thanks,” I said. “Feels a bit weird to be wearing it at 10 a.m.”
She gestured to her wardrobe. “I’ve got plenty of comfies in there. You’ll likely fit into a load of them.”
I wasn’t so sure of that, but I appreciated her optimism.
“Honestly,” she said and pointed over again. “Go take a look. Can’t have you in that thing all weekend now, can we?”
All weekend.
I appreciated her optimism even more.
I took a look while she took a fresh look at me. She had a load of joggers I’d just about get into and some t-shirts too.
“Thanks,” I said again and took an outfit’s worth.
She patted the seat next to her bed. “Now come and tell me how you ended up in here on a Saturday morning, darling. I’m all ears.”
So, I did.
I told her about dropping my bookmark on the train and how he’d been amazing and given it back to me. I told her about reading books in the mornings and commenting on the titles, and how one day I’d seen him go into the hospital and not known who he was, but ended up in the same ward as him, and how good he was as Dr Hall.
She listened to every word, nodding and smiling, and quizzing me for more.
It felt so weird to talk about it like that – about just how crazy a story it was, but she didn’t make it feel like that. The smile on her face told me she thought it was so much more than weird.
“Synchronicity,” she said when I got to the Gina’s leaving party bit. She patted my hand. “You a believer in synchronicity, sweetheart?”
“I believe in loads of stuff,” I told her. “People think I’m a bit dappy for it most of the time.”
“Never stop believing in it,” she said. “No matter what people think, never stop believing in it. I never have. It’s where your heart sings loudest, when that belief in the world comes true.”
She was just like me.
The eternal optimist.
I could see it a mile off, that she was a glass always full, even if it’s empty kind of person like me.
I loved that. I rarely found it in other people, especially people in her position.
Her oxygen was rumbling. Her chest was strained and tired. Her limbs were so frail they looked like they might snap, but her energy, the energy from within. You could never snap that. Not with all the strength in the world.
She cleared her throat before she spoke again. “So, what do you know about my boy?”
I smiled before I answered.
“Nothing very much,” I said. “Apart from that he’s a fantastic doctor and a big reader. Both of those things are brill.”
I left the great in bed stuff unsaid, but she laughed and hinted at it for me. “Pretty damn good at other stuff too, I imagine. Or you’d have been off like a shot this morning.”
I knew I was blushing beetroot, and she laughed at that as well.
She paused, and her eyes sparkled. “Let’s get you a bit more clued up on Logan Hall, then, shall we?”26LoganI couldn’t think about emails. I couldn’t think about anything other than the girl upstairs. I managed to drag my attention back hard enough to my laptop screen that I got the emails fired off, but I was desperate for her, being so close but so far.
It was a while before I climbed the stairs to pull the sparrow from the clutches of my nosey mother, but clearly that didn’t matter. Those clutches were welcome.
I’d known that would be the case.
I could hear their laughter from out on the landing – mother’s amazing screech of a cackle seemed more energetic than ever, and Chloe’s sweet little giggle along to match.
It was a beautiful thing, hearing them together. It was enough to slam me right through my gut, that lurch of such genuine affection inside.
Mum wasn’t wrong, and I knew it. I was besotted with the girl in a way I hadn’t even contemplated since Evelyn all those years ago. I barely mentioned her name anymore, not even to myself, but I couldn’t avoid it with Chloe here, in my home. The similarities of how I felt about her were undeniable. I craved her with every part of me.
Hearing her with my mother was a beautiful thing, but not nearly so beautiful as when I put my head around the bedroom door and saw them there, laughing together – sweet Chloe and my mum, both of them lost in each other and the humour in each other’s words.
Mum was sitting up high in her bed, leaning towards the delightful ball of energy at her side as she giggled. Chloe was leaning right back at her, looking divine in her dress from the night before.