“I don’t know how, but they accepted me. I started doing tasks for them, errands. I made some changes to the way they set up their drug network that made it harder for my superiors to arrest their low-level drug guys, which annoyed some people in my department, but it earned me a lot of credibility.
“I spent years undercover with them. I gained the trust of the second in command, a man named Alfonso. He took me under his wing, began teaching me everything about their organization, and wanted me to take over some important role as soon as I could.
“But one day, my superiors got impatient. I’d messed with their plans once already and they didn’t like the way things were going. Political winds had changed and the city needed a big bust and needed it badly, so they turned to me. They had me give them everything I could, and they took it all to the DA.
“The DA had a hard-on for some higher-up mob bosses. It wasn’t the big guy, the head of it all, but they were still some of his most important men. One day, our agents kicked down doors, and arrested the lot of them. Six upper-level made men ended up doing serious, long-term sentences because of me.
“Two days after the trial, not long after Tabitha was born, I came home from work to find my wife with her throat cut ear to ear. Tabitha was crying in her crib, thank fucking god they hadn’t touched her. Those men, they’re monsters. I wouldn’t put it past them.
“After that, I ran. I took Tab and I ran. I moved around for a while, hopping from town to town, but after a few months I realized that Tab couldn’t grow up on the road. So I ended up here in Loftville, some tiny little nowhere town in rural Virginia. Close enough that I didn’t think they’d suspect it, but far enough that they shouldn’t have had any eyes here.
“My wife died because of what I did. She was murdered because I did the right fucking thing. And now I think they’re back. Now I think they’re coming here to finish the job.”
We sit in silence. She stares at me with wide, stunned eyes. She doesn’t move a muscle and I want her to say something, but I’m also afraid of what she’ll say.
Fucking hell, I bet she doesn’t believe me. I mean, I just told the most insane story possible. If I were her, I’d turn around and run away. That’s probably for the best.
I’d rather she thinks I’m crazy than end up dead like Beth.
“It must be so hard,” she says.
“What?” I look at her, surprised.
“Living like that. Living on the run, looking over your shoulder. It must be really hard.”
“I… yeah, it’s hard. But did you hear that story?”
She nods once. “I heard it. And I’m so sorry you went through that. Your wife’s death wasn’t your fault, you know.”
“I know that. It’s just, I bring danger with me wherever I go. If I could give Tab away somehow and know for certain she’d grow up safe, I’d do it, but I know I can’t. I’ll never know for sure that the mob let her go, and at least I can keep a close eye on her when we’re together. Otherwise, I’m a walking train wreck. I’m death for you.”
“No, you’re not.” She leans toward me. “Just because some bastards want to hurt you… that’s not your fault. You did the right thing.”
I stare at her, taken aback by her response. I lean toward her and take her hair in my fingers. She leans toward me, lips parted, and a little moan escapes her lips. She purrs when I kiss her, tongue in her mouth.
I didn’t expect this. God, I didn’t expect it at all.
We kiss slowly and I taste her, groaning to myself. I love it, love the way she kisses me with such passion and intensity. She needs it just as much as I do and it drives me wild.
But fuck, no, no. This isn’t right.
I pull back. She’s breathing hard, body shifted toward me. I release her hair. “You should run away,” I say. “You heard that story. The last woman that got close to me ended up dead.”
“I’m sorry for her,” she says. “I really am. But I’m not her.”
“I know that.”
“I have money and resources. I have protection back at the manor. I’m safer than you are.”
I hesitate. I cock my head. She’s right about that, actually. She’s much safer than I am in the manor, although she’s not much safer out here. I feel exposed and I have the insane urge to usher her inside, away from the forest, but I know that wouldn’t help anything.
“Look, I want you. I’m not going to pretend like I don’t. But I’m not about to put you in danger.”