Off Limits (Off 2)

As I get out of the cab at my apartment, I reflect on my father's advice. To go after my dreams and the things I want, and to not let anyone stand in my way.

That is damned good advice.

Rather than going up to my apartment, I get in my car and decide to head across the river.

***

I knock on the door to Linc's apartment. I have no idea if Nix is even here, and if he is, I have no idea what I'm going to say to him. But I do think we need to talk about what's going on between us. Clearly, there is an insane mutual attraction and frankly, I need him to give me a better reason why we shouldn't act on it.

My father said to go get what I wanted and I want Nix Caldwell. And I don't feel the slightest bit trashy for it. This is all part of my collective plan to experience life and there is something that I believe I can learn from Nix.

And I'm not just talking about sex, although, if I can get him to capitulate, I'm sure it will be amazing. No, there is something about Nix that is captivating me. He's got more facets than the Hope Diamond and he intrigues the hell out of me. I know he says he's not relationship material, and I'm not even sure I'm looking for a relationship, but Nix has experiences and wisdom that go beyond anyone I've ever met. I want to figure him out. I want to learn from him.

And if we have sex along the way...that would be great too.

The door swings open and Nix is standing there. He's clearly surprised to see me and an array of emotions play across his beautiful face. First, something hot flares in his eyes, then it switches to wariness, then--if I'm not mistaken--there's anger.

Just great. He's pissed off that I showed up.

Instead of telling me to leave, however, he grabs my hand and pulls me into the apartment.

"What's wrong?" he asks. His voice is laced with worry, which catches me off guard.

Can't he just think I might want to come over to seduce him?

"What makes you think something is wrong?" I grumble.

"Because you've clearly been crying," he says gently.

Oh!

Now I'm off my game. I was completely empowered driving over here. I was going to go after what I wanted, just like my father told me to do. Although I'm sure he was not specifically thinking for me to go after a man when he told me that. Still, the principle of his advice is solid.

And now I don't know what to say. So I just stand there like an idiot.

"Emily, why were you crying?"

"Um...it's nothing. Just a little run in with my mother."

Still holding my hand, Nix leads me into the kitchen. He releases it and opens the fridge, pulling out a bottle of white wine. He pulls down a glass from the cabinet and fills it. Handing it to me, he says, "What happened?"

I didn't come over here to spill my family dirt to Nix. I don't want to get sidetracked from my mission. After a small sip of the wine--which is delicious by the way--I look Nix in the eye. "I want to resume discussions with you about us having sex."

"What the fuck, Emily?" Nix literally steps away from me as if I'm diseased. "And that's why you were crying?"

"What? No, that's not why I was crying. I was crying for something else that I don't want to talk about. I want to talk about sex."

Nix is staring at me as if my head is on fire. A combination of horror and odd curiosity. "You want to talk about sex?"

"Yes."

"I don't understand."

I blow out a pent up breath of frustration. "Are you purposely being obtuse?"

Nix doesn't answer but reaches in the fridge and pulls out a beer. He twists the cap off and throws it in the sink. He takes a long swallow and just stares at me. The muscle that sits just along his jawbone is popping.

Finally, he says, "There's nothing to talk about. We are not having sex."

"Now you're just being stubborn," I mutter. "All guys want to have sex."

The corners of his mouth twitch and it's nice to know he finds me so amusing. I clearly need to change tactics because I was hoping he would find me alluring and sexy.

What to do?

I know. I'll try some logic first, and if that doesn't work, maybe I'll just strip naked and see what happens.

"Let me ask you something, Nix."

"What's that?" I can tell he finds this line of questioning from me to be quite entertaining.

"Do you find me attractive?" I don't intend for it to happen necessarily but my voice is throaty...full of promise.

He stares at me hard, the jaw muscle popping faster. "Yes."

I'm thrilled just by that simple admission and it fuels me on.

"Have you thought about us having sex? You know...down and dirty style?" I throw that last bit in there to amp up the heat factor on my logical argument.

He swallows hard and his eyes turn a darker shade of moss. His voice is harsh when he says, "Yes."

"And do you imagine me...doing things to you?"

I'm not sure where that question came from. My plan to lay out a logical path of reasoning seems to have evaporated as I realize my questions are nothing more than an intense seduction so I can get what I want.

Sometimes I don't even realize the depths of depravity I will sink to.

I notice that Nix is gripping his beer bottle so hard that his knuckles are white.

"I imagine you doing a lot of things to me, Emily." Nix's voice is low and guttural and it causes me to shiver. "What's your point in all of this?"

Hmmm...so he wants me to bring this to a logical conclusion after all? Well, you asked for it, Nix Caldwell.

I set my wineglass down on the counter and walk to him. I reach out and take his beer bottle from his hand. It slides easily from his fingers and I set it down next to my wine.

Stepping in close to him, he's looking down at me with such carnality, my knees almost buckle. We aren't touching anywhere but the physical heat swirling between our bodies is palpable, like the waves of hot air that roll off a blazing fire.

"My point is that I want the same things you do. We're not as different as you think we are."

Nix mov

es suddenly, bringing his hand up to the back of my head and grabs a fistful of hair. I gasp in shock and a thrill of hope runs through me. He slowly pulls my head back so my neck is exposed fully and I can't help but wonder if he's looking for my submission.

"What do you want from me?" His voice is hesitant, maybe a bit distrustful.

"Whatever you're willing to share with me, I'll take it. And I won't ever push you for anything more."

He studies me. His gaze flicks choppily between my eyes, trying to see if there is a lie somewhere. He looks briefly toward my lips, as if considering whether it's safe to kiss me, then he comes back to my eyes again.

Finally, he says, "I don't want to hurt you."

"You won't," I hastily assure him. "You can't. Not if I don't expect anything from you. I'm clear on that Nix, I promise."

He's on the edge, teetering. He needs just a tiny push. I step in closer to him, and press my body into his. His breath comes out in a mass exodus as he closes his eyes and grits his teeth. The man's self-control is amazing and I'm starting to feel like this may be an insurmountable mission on my part.

But before I can consider it any longer, Nix opens his eyes and pins me with a look that is resolute.

"Fuck it," he says, right before he slams his mouth down on mine.

I'm caught off guard. I was trying to gear myself up to either back away gracefully or amp up my seduction, so I am not ready for this onslaught. Regardless, my heart leaps in response to the knowledge he's made a decision and he's acting on it.

Nix loosens the grip on my hair, but it's only to spread his hand wide so he can hold my head in place. He takes his other arm and wraps it around my waist, pulling me tight into his body. I gasp when I feel his thickness press into my belly.

His kiss is brutal and I don't know if he's trying to scare me off or if he's just unleashing a firestorm of passion, but a small sound of pleasure bubbles low in my throat over his possession of me. And it is a possession in every sense of the word.

I notice that my hands are pinned between us and I work them out of the tight space so that I can wrap them around his neck. I scrape my nails along his scalp, feeling the slippery coolness of his hair in between my fingers.

Just as I'm getting accommodated to his body pressed to mine and to the way his tongue is sliding along my own, he drops both hands from me. I have no time to bemoan a protest because they immediately drop to my hips and grab fistfuls of my dress.