She sighs while shaking her head. “You’re wrong.”
How can she know? “Has he told you he doesn’t want kids?”
“He wants children.” She covers her face with her hands. “But I don’t think he wants them with me.”
Addison is clearly shaken and lacks her usual confidence. “Why would you say that?”
“We’ve been together a year and he hasn’t proposed. Shit, he never even talks about marrying me. The only future we ever discuss is one with him owning his own vineyard. I’m never part of the equation.”
Wow. I had no idea. But that doesn’t mean he has no plans to marry Addison. I’ve seen the way he looks at her and I know he’s head over heels in love with her. “He’s ambitious. I’m sure he’s waiting because he’d like to have a way of supporting you and your habits before he makes you his wife. Zac’s no fool. He’s figured out that you’re high maintenance.”
She grins but it’s halfhearted. “Then we could be years away from him being able to afford me. Or maybe he’s years away from being ready to be a husband and father.”
“Zac might have a choice on the husband part, but he doesn’t on the parent thing. Kids don’t wait around for their parents to be ready. They come when they decide they want to.” Look at me. It took over twenty years for my parents to finally act like a mother and father. Sort of.
“Maybe he thinks I’m good enough to fuck but not good enough to be his wife or the mother of his kids.”
“There’s no way he thinks that. I’d bet money he asks you to marry him as soon as he knows there’s a little Zac inside you.”
“But don’t you see? That’s exactly what I don’t want. He needs to marry me because he loves me more than anything in this world. Even more than his dream of owning a successful vineyard. I want him to love me the way Jack loves you. I won’t settle for less.”
That’s probably one of the most mature things I’ve ever heard come out of Addie’s mouth. “And you shouldn’t have to.”
“Oh my God, Laurie. I’m going to have a sweet little adorable chubby-cheeked … shit machine.” She leans over and rests her forehead against her palms. “I’m going to get fat and have stretch marks. And hemorrhoids. You know that has to be a total turn-off. Oh God. My sex life is over.”
And here we go with the exaggerating. “I’m sure there are measures you can take to prevent those things, or at least reduce them. You should do some research so you’ll know what to expect.”
Her head spins so she can see me. “Let me guess. You’re suggesting I read that book about pregnancy expectations.”
Addison makes no bones about it. She is no intellect and doesn’t claim to be. The world is lucky if she reads stop signs. “It might be a good place to start … after you tell Zac.”
She shakes her head, her face stern. “No way. I’m not ready to do that.”
She’s being unreasonable. How long does she plan to hide this? This secret has an expiration and it will reveal itself with or without her permission. “You can’t keep this from him for long. He’s going to figure it out and I can’t imagine that going over well.”
“I know. It won’t take long before he figures out I’m missing my period. God, he’s such a control freak. He keeps up with my cycles better than I do, but I need a little time to sort out how he might take the news.”
A control freak is exactly what Addie needs—someone to steer her in the right direction. I know her and I understand what she’s saying without hearing the words directly. I’m afraid it won’t go over well if she baits Zac to get his reaction. She’s not considering the whole picture. It’s easy to say what one would do when they’re not actually in the situation. No one truly knows how they’ll feel about a circumstance until it happens to them. “Please don’t try to make Zac speculate about a proposed pregnancy. Your baby isn’t hypothetical. It’s real and he deserves to know as soon as possible.”
“And I’ll tell him but I need to know how he feels about me—minus a baby—first. If he asks me to marry him, I want to know it’s because he loves me, Laurie. Not on account of an obligation or because he wants to hang on to me because he’s afraid his child will slip away.”
Okay. I understand her desire to want to know his true feelings for her before he finds out about the baby. I would feel the same if standing in her shoes. “Be smart about the way you do this. The last thing you need is for him to feel deceived.”
A shocked expression comes over her. “What if I’ve been looking at this the wrong way? I’ve imagined him asking me to marry him because he wants to do the right thing but what if I’m wrong and he tells me he never wants to see me again? Or wants me to get an abortion? He has so many dreams for the future and I’m afraid he’ll think a baby will ruin it all.”
I hadn’t considered that possibility and I’m not sure why. Isn’t that sort of what my dad did to my mom? “If he does, then screw him. He can piss off because you have me. I’ll always be on your side and will help you raise this baby.”
Addison reaches across the table to cup her hand around mine. “You’re always the stable one and I’m the loose cannon. It should be you having a baby. Not me.”
This is probably the one time Jack Henry would completely agree with Addison. “It will be one day.” Hopefully one day very soon.
Jack Henry’s sitting at his desk looking at a vineyard map. “Hey, babe.” He puts his arms out for me so I go to him. He pulls me onto his lap and nuzzles his nose against my neck. “How did brunch go with Addison?”
He’s really asking if I got an explanation out of her regarding why she didn’t tell me about Chloe and Ben. “She said it slipped her mind.”
He pulls back and looks at me. “And you believe her?”
I put my hand up, indicating that I need to explain. “Not at first, but then she told me about everything going on in her life and I knew it was the truth. She’s been preoccupied.”
He leans back in his chair, taking me with him. “What has little Miss Self-Absorbed gotten herself into this time?”
“She’s pregnant.”
He lifts his brows. “Is it Zac’s?”