Stout (Men of Lovibond 2)

She’s traded her skintight red dress for a black one, equally as tight and hoochie. And her sights are set on Oliver.

“I didn’t tell Lawry about the grand opening. But I should have. I know she wouldn’t have invited her if she knew what happened.”

Ivy punches Oliver in the arm. “Oh hell to the naw, Stout. You can’t throw that out there and then not tell us what she did.”

Oliver’s voice is a whisper. “She lured me outside to fuck.”

Kelsey and Ivy each display their own version of a that is so nasty face. “I hope you didn’t.”

“Hell, no.”

“Hell-llo, birthday boy.” Her voice reminds me of Marilyn Monroe doing “Happy Birthday, Mr. President.” A bad cross between babyish and the intent to be sexy.

“Marlana.” She leans in, embraces him, and presses a kiss to his cheek. For real?

Oliver’s arm is wrapped around me. And he doesn’t release me even when she tries to swoop in like a vulture.

“Having a good time?”

“Oh, yes. A wonderful time indeed. Even better now.”

“You can thank Adelyn for that. She organized everything, just like she did with BCC’s grand opening.”

Bootylicious leans in and whispers, “It’s so hard to find good help these days.” She’ll need some good help when I put my foot in her ass.

She loops her arm through Oliver’s. “I must have a dance with the birthday boy.”

“Actually, Adelyn asked me to dance with her just before you walked up.”

I might have gone along with him had he properly introduced me to his sister’s friends but I’m still annoyed, even if he has kept his arm around me. “It’s okay. Dance with Marlana. We’ll have our dance later.”

He digs his fingers into my hip. “You sure about that? I already told you I would.”

“Oh, I’m quite sure. Go cut a rug, Thorn.” I sort of feel bad as I watch Oliver walk away with Marlana.

“She has a ferocious case of twat odor.”

I must have misunderstood what Ivy just said. “What was that again?”

“You heard her right. She’s a labor and delivery nurse. Her sniffer can identify stinky twat from across the room. It’s her only gift.”

“That woman has trich. I’d bet money on it.”

“You talking about Trichomona-whatever-that-word-is and however you say it?”

“Yes. Treatable but it’s some foul-smelling shit. Very avoidable when you don’t mess with infected dick.”

Infected dick. That’s a new one on me. “Got it.”

“I’m thinking Oliver must have pissed you off about something.”

I must look like a total bitch. Not the impression I wanted to make with women so close to Lawrence. “He did.”

“Don’t forget we’ve known Stout for years. So we also know he probably deserves worse.” I’m not so sure. That woman was a handful at the grand opening. I was a witness to that. And now I’ve sent him away to dance with her and her stinky fish taco.

“Nicely played. He’ll think twice before pissing you off again.” Kelsey gestures toward me with a nod. “I think she could fit in just fine with Law and us.”

“I think you could be right.” Ivy slips her foot out of her shoe and flexes her toes. “There’s an open table. Let’s sit down. These things are killing my feet.”

“That’s whatcho ass deserves for wearing four-inch fuck-me pumps.”

Ivy puts her feet in Kelsey’s lap. “These fuckers may hurt, but they look damn good.”

Kelsey pushes Ivy’s feet away. “You look like you have a butt plug shoved up your ass when you walk in those things.”

Ivy makes a show of loudly whispering. “Bitch, I thought we agreed we weren’t going to talk about my butt plug issues in public anymore.”

“Don’t listen to her. She’s crazy.” These girls are my kind of crazy.

“I am a little. And mildly inappropriate. That’s why I’m not afraid to ask the burning question: What’s going on between you and Stout?”

What makes them think anything’s going on? His arm around me? “You heard what he said. Apparently, I’m just his neighbor and corporate event coordinator.”

“There’s only one reason those descriptions would piss you off bad enough to send him to the dance floor with that woman.”

“Oooh, mama.” Ivy’s mouth pulls to the side, as do her eyes. She puts her hands together and does the wiggly-villain-fingers thing. “I can’t wait to tell Law she was right. Adelyn is putting the shine on Stout’s knob.”

“I don’t believe I’ve ever heard it called that before.”

“Did you hear that, Kel? She didn’t deny it.” Ivy sounds excited.

“No need to when it’s the truth.” I can’t help but wonder what Oliver’s sister might have said about us. “Will Lawrence think that’s a good or bad thing?”

“Very good. She’s been pulling for the two of you to get together since Stout moved next door.” These are Lawrence’s best friends. I guess they’d know.

I’m relieved to know his sister is in our corner. Makes things a whole lot easier.

Ivy leans over the balcony railing. “Awe, hell. Look at Stout and that dancing fuck hole.” I actually feel a little bad for sending him down there with her. “I think we all agree he chose his words poorly but making him dance with that woman is cruel and unusual punishment.”

Kelsey turns away. “It’s too fucking brutal to watch.”

“Girl, it’s his birthday. You have to go save him before all of his nose hairs are singed.”

The punishment doesn’t fit the crime. “You’re right. He doesn’t deserve that.”

“No one with a sense of smell deserves that.” Ivy waves her hand under her nose. “Ugh. I think her odor is stuck in my nose. Makes me want to puke.”

“Okay. I’m going down to rescue my man.”

The band is playing their rendition of “Your Body Is A Wonderland.” Not bad. I like it, but the same can’t be said for Marlana or the way she’s hanging all over Oliver. My Oliver.

I time my approach perfectly with the end of the song. She’s danced with him long enough so there shouldn’t be a protest about giving him up.

“May I cut in?”

“I need him for one more, hon. We didn’t get a slow song.” Bitch.

“Bad timing, I’m afraid. This is our song.”

“Your song?”

“That’s right. Adelyn and I are dating.” Oh, he decides to claim me when it’s c

onvenient.

“Thanks for coming, Marlana. Enjoy the rest of the party.” Oliver steps away from her, turns his back, and takes me in his arms.

She has been dismissed.

That’s right, bitch. He’s mine. “Be sure and get some stout cake before you go. It’s delish.”

Oliver leads me, maybe in some kind of a two-step, to the other side of the dance floor. “You have some smooth moves tonight, birthday boy.”

“I think yours are much smoother. Or underhanded.” Okay. He’s calling me out on what I did. Guess I deserve that.

“I’m sorry.”

“Why the fuck did you send me off with her?”

Admitting I’m angry about the way he labeled me is going to reveal a lot about my feelings. But I don’t care. Maybe Oliver should know I think of myself as more. “I got a little pissed off when you introduced me as your neighbor and employee.”

“But you are my neighbor. And we’ve hired you for two events in a month.” Not the answer I was looking to get from this confrontation.

“So all of your neighbors and employees suck your dick?”

He laughs while nodding. “Okay. I get it now.”

I’m not finished with him yet. “And another thing. We agreed to try this. A relationship. Don’t you think I’m worthy of being told today is your birthday?”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t think of how that might make you feel.”

“Well, it hurt my feelings.” I hate admitting that. Makes me feel weak. “Keeping it from me says more than you might think.”

His looks thoughtful for a moment. The skin around his eyes wrinkles before the blue diverts away from me. His mouth pinches into a tight line so nothing slips out before he’s given it plenty of thought.

I can almost see the wheels in his head spinning out of control as he considers my words. He isn’t immediately jumping on the excuse wagon like so many men do. He’s giving this thought. Considering my feelings.

“It’s not like that, Max. It’s just . . . I’m not big on celebrating my birthday. It’s like any other day to me.”

“Except it’s not. You’re turning thirty. One of those numbers with a zero behind it. They only come every ten years so they’re special.”