She only had to turn a fraction to kiss him.
‘We’d better get back out there,’ he said, as if it was the last thing he wanted to do.
‘Of course.’ It was the last thing she wanted to do too.
They tiptoed out of the room, closing the door on the calm inside. She paused, not wanting to go back to the lawn. He stood still too, looking at her.
‘Nadia …’
She knew he wanted to kiss her. And she wanted to kiss him. No games this time—just because it would feel so good. So right. But something was stopping him, and Nadia didn’t know what.
‘Where is she?’ Jess appeared in the hall.
Ethan turned away and answered. The relief on Jess’s face revealed the stress she’d been feeling. Ethan put his arm along his sister’s shoulder and teased, ‘Soothing irritable girls is my speciality.’
Nadia didn’t know if that was a coded message to her or not. But the fact was she didn’t want to be soothed. She wanted to be stirred.
Ethan chatted to his sister for a few minutes more, but the second Jess wandered away to mingle, Ethan’s teasing façade dropped and he looked plain tired. No wonder. She’d just seen how hard he worked to be the charming guy who held it together for the women in his family even when he was at the very end of his own patience. But he’d masked it, protectively cared for Bella—and Jess—a gently wicked joker who’d made them feel better. But right now he looked like the one who needed help to feel better. She wished he’d talk to her. But why would he open up to his opponent in this stupid fight of theirs? She knew he was mortified by his mistake about his father, and she didn’t want to embarrass him more, but there was something there and she wanted to know.
‘I’d never have thought you’d play the piano like that,’ she said to lighten the atmosphere. ‘You look too rugby.’
He managed a grin. ‘The girls had to learn. I got sent along too. They never liked it enough to practise.’
‘But you did?’
He nodded briefly. ‘Let’s get out of here.’
People were departing, so it wasn’t as if they were the first to leave, but Nadia was glad they weren’t going to be the last.
‘You outdid yourself, Jess. Again.’ Ethan gave his sister another hug.
‘Thank you very much,’ Nadia said to Jess. ‘It was the most beautiful afternoon tea I’ve ever seen. Everything was so perfect.’ She wasn’t lying. The décor, the food, the style of it all had been amazing.
Jess smiled at her. So did Polly.
‘It would be really nice to see you again some time, Nadia,’ Polly called after them.
With an uncomfortable ache in her heart Nadia kept walking to his car and pretended she hadn’t heard. She couldn’t face another forty minutes of silence on the drive back so she went for light, safe conversation.
‘So tell me about your work. All those billable hours, huh? Are you prosecution or defence?’
Ethan gripped the steering wheel even tighter. Oh, hell, he really hadn’t told her anything—and he grimaced about telling her now. He didn’t do the save-the-innocent barrister act, and if she really was all about ‘making a difference’ then she was going to be disappointed. Still, he was used to that—right? His dad had never got over his decision to go corporate rather than chasing after the Queen’s Counsel dream, despite the fact Ethan earned more now than he’d ever have done in chambers. But for his father it was all about public prestige. For Nadia it was that higher purpose thing—which meant she was going to be even more sceptical than his dad.
‘I’m not a barrister,’ he said heavily. ‘I don’t go to court and present arguments to a judge.’
‘Oh? What do you do, then?’
‘Corporate.’ His discomfort was stupid, because his job was unbelievably competitive. ‘I’m an aviation specialist.’
She frowned. ‘Aviation?’
Yeah, there wasn’t that much adulation in that. ‘As in big deals between big airlines and aircraft manufacturers. Leasing and financing and stuff.’
‘And that’s law?’
‘They need legal advice to do the deals—so, yes.’
‘Oh.’
‘It’s very interesting.’ Hell, did he sound desperate for approval or what? But he loved it. Wouldn’t work crazy hours if he didn’t.
‘I’m sure.’
‘It’s more interesting than HR.’ Totally defensive now.
‘Well, that wouldn’t be hard.’ She laughed suddenly. ‘So, does that mean you get to go for rides in flash private planes?’
‘The question everyone asks.’ He rolled his eyes. ‘I expected more from you. Sometimes—not often.’
‘But you like planes?’
‘Always have. I like flying.’
‘Can you?’
‘I have my pilot’s licence.’ And he sky-dived. He liked the rush of that.
‘Oh, that’s cool. So you really love it?’
‘Yeah, I do.’ Finally the grin broke out of him. ‘Going to work is fun. But it’s not what people think of when you tell them you’re a lawyer.’
‘Who cares?’ she said. ‘You work in a field you love. You’re lucky. Your parents must be proud.’
Ethan sent her a sideways look, but she was smiling ahead at the road, all innocence. Yeah, right. She was fishing, but he wasn’t biting. Because, no, his father wasn’t proud. ‘You mean you don’t love HR? But you get to make people miserable, right?’ He teased his way out of answering.
‘Very funny.’
‘So why did you get into it if it’s not floating your boat?’
‘I wanted a job in a big firm. All big firms need HR people.’
‘Why big?’
‘The usual reasons—money, security.’
‘Yeah, but bigger isn’t always better.’
‘You’re wrong.’ She shook her head. ‘It was nice meeting your family.’
Nice—great. That awful word again. And she couldn’t possibly think it had been nice. She was back to fishing. Apprehension slithered down his spine. Inviting her into his life this way had been crazy. How was she going to report back to her web-witches? He figured he’d be in for a caning. But had she seen hi
s family’s vulnerability? Did she even care? What about Bella? Those moments by the piano that had filled him with pleasure before now made him wince. Did Nadia think he was superficial enough to have orchestrated that? She was so untrusting she probably did. He wanted to skip this as the third date. They should do something else. But that would mean seeing her again—and that seemed like a really dumb idea. This wasn’t the game it had been, and it sure as hell wasn’t uncomplicated.
As he pulled up outside her flat he knew he had to address it. ‘Please don’t write about today in your blog.’ Annoyed at how husky he sounded, he spoke faster, more harshly. ‘I don’t want all that out there. Not Dad. And I didn’t set that up with Bella to prove anything to you. Can’t—?’
‘Do you think I don’t know that?’ she interrupted, her voice shrill. ‘Do you really think I’d mention any of that?’
He was silent.
In the confines of his car her anger reverberated. Her outrage. Her hurt.
‘What kind of a person do you think I am?’ she asked, totally wounded. ‘You haven’t gotten to know me at all, have you? You haven’t listened to anything I’ve told you.’ She leapt out of the car and ran up her path.
Ethan stared after her—hating himself even more than he had that moment almost two hours ago. He’d felt sick when he’d seen his father talking to Nadia. He’d seen the look. It was how he looked at her—as if she was some delicate morsel to be devoured. Nadia had been wrong. Or maybe she’d been right and it was just that Ethan was so paranoid about his father he couldn’t see straight.
Either way it didn’t matter, because the revelation was still clear and still true. He’d always said he was nothing like his father, but Nadia had said differently. And he was the same—every bit the same selfish, insensitive jerk. He’d just proved it.
He swore and leaped out of the car.
‘Nadia!’ He grabbed the front door handle so she couldn’t open it and get away from him. But she didn’t turn around. A slender, silver fairy-woman stood in front of him—one he wanted to pull back against him and keep her there. He ached for the hot, sweet relief to be found with her.
He bent his head, lightly brushing his lips in her hair, hoping she couldn’t feel it as he breathed in her scent. ‘I’m sorry.’