Bad Teacher

I don’t want to know.

I don’t want to realize that I fucked up … and that there’s no going back from here.

* * *

Hailey

As I walk through the school building, more people are looking at me than usual. I mean, I get that a red bob draws attention, but I’ve never had this many eyeballs on me. Could it be the earrings? Just in case, I take them off and tuck them in my pocket. Still, people are looking at me, and not just that … they’re whispering too. And laughing.

Someone bumps into me and giggles when she sees me, exchanging looks with her friends.

One of them whispers into her ear, and I can just catch a few words.

“She’s that girl.”

That girl?

I walk past them only for more stares to find me in the cafeteria.

It’s as if everyone suddenly knows who I am.

Or worse.

They know something I don’t.

I hurry to the vending machine and get a Snickers before running off again.

While I walk, I still hear them talk behind my back.

“Look, it’s her.”

“Who?”

“That girl they’re talking about.”

Who is they? Is it everyone? Why? What do they know?

Panic zaps through me as I walk fast, trying to get away from the people who seemingly know me for no other reason other than rumors. I don’t even know what’s going on or how they all suddenly found out.

I go into the bathroom to try to escape it all. That’s when I run into Lesley.

“Hailey, oh my god, have you heard the rumors that are being spread around?” She grabs my arm and pulls me aside.

“Yes, but I don’t get it. What are they saying?” I ask.

She looks around to see if anyone’s snooping before leaning in and whispering, “Everyone knows about your fling with Mr. Hard.”

“What?”

My throat clamps up, and I struggle to breathe.

“Listen, someone found out. They saw him leaving our dorm room, and then rumors started spreading. It’s been going on since this morning, but most of it is about Mr. Hard.”

My heart beats in my throat.

“They all know it’s me …” I mutter.

“Some girl found out who was living in our dorm room, and at first, they thought it was me, but then one of them remembered they’d seen you two together an awful lot lately. They put two and two together … and well, the whole school is talking about it.”

“The whole school is talking about it?” I repeat.

“I’m sorry, Hailey.”

“Everyone knows I’m screwing my professor?” I say, tears welling up in my eyes.

“I’m really sorry.” Lesley pulls me in for a hug. “God, I wish it never happened. But you should’ve been more careful. Why did you invite him to our home?”

“I don’t know … so many things happened. My mom’s boyfriend called. I needed him,” I say, still not getting to terms with the fact that everyone knows.

But then it hits me.

If they know about me … they know about him, as well.

Thomas.

“Oh, god.” I slap my hand in front of my mouth.

“What?” Lesley asks as I pull myself out of her embrace.

“He’s gonna lose his job,” I mutter. “Shit. Shit!”

“Calm down. What do you mean lose his job?”

“He’s a professor. I’m his student. Everyone knows,” I say, pacing around in the bathroom.

“Oh … damn. I hadn’t thought about that. His reputation will be ruined.”

“Exactly.” I run my fingers through my hair. “And it’s all my fault.”

She cocks her head and sighs. “Don’t say that.”

“It is. I practically seduced him to continue with our affair. He wanted to quit, but I wouldn’t let him.”

“He agreed on his own. He’s a grown man. He’s responsible for his own mistakes,” she says, but I’m not listening anymore.

I feel so guilty.

So bad.

I just have to go to him.

“I’m gonna see if he’s in his office.”

“He’s not. I already checked.” She clears her throat when I look confused. “When I heard the rumors, I wanted to go tell him, but he wasn’t there. Do you think he’s gone home? Maybe he knows too.”

I take a deep breath and sigh. “I don’t know, but I’m going after him.”

“What? Wait,” she says as I open the door. “And then what? What are you gonna do when you get there?”

I shrug. “I don’t know, but anything’s better than staying here where everyone’s talking about me. I’m now that girl.”

“That’ll blow over. You know they don’t remember this shit,” she says as I walk out.

I glance at her over my shoulder. “Still, I fucked up. I have to go talk with him.”

“All right … well, just take care of yourself, okay? I’ll be in our dorm room if you need me,” she says.

“Thanks,” I say, smiling at her, but it’s all fake.

On the inside, I’m burning. Burning with rage.

Burning with regret.

If only I’d been more careful.

Then it wouldn’t all have gone to shit.

* * *