You couldn’t protect your spirit…as it faded more and more every time.
Bethany said it got easier as time went on.
No—it got worse.
The guard really got off on torturing me.
He continued to treat me like a dog, making me work for my dinner, like busting my ass all day wasn’t enough to garner a meal.
He pulled the chair from the wall and placed it in front of me, where he took a seat.
Fuck. This. Shit.
He held up the tray. “Wow, this looks good…pot roast, carrots, sourdough bread…some strawberries…” He took a loud sniff before he lowered it again. “Just as good as the dinner we get.”
The only reason I didn’t fall apart was because this torture was temporary. Magnus would return eventually, and this nightmare would end. I would get my meals like usual, even get some nice company—and maybe if I could convince him, my freedom. I hated all the guards when I arrived here, including Magnus, but now he was my ally, just like Bethany was. He would return…and rescue me from this hell.
I kept my eyes on his dark hood, seeing his thick black beard stick out a bit. I knew what his face looked like now, after spotting him inside the largest cabin. At least I didn’t have to look him in the eye now, just focus on the shadow over his face.
“No dinner every night… You must be hungry.”
“Not particularly.” Having to sit there in his presence chased away my appetite.
“Why don’t I believe you?” A deep chuckle came from his throat because he was enjoying this way too much. He grabbed the fork and stirred the contents on the plate, moving the beef through the gravy.
My stomach growled.
I heard it.
He heard it.
I didn’t need to see his smile to know it was there.
“I’ll make a deal with you.” He moved the tray forward and placed it in my lap.
I wasn’t stupid enough to touch it.
“You can have all of that…if you do something for me.”
I already knew where this was going.
“Eat my cock…and then you can eat this.”
My goal was to stay strong, and in order to do that, I needed nutrition. I had definitely had a hard time working that afternoon because my body was at such a deficit. But there was no motivation that could make me agree to that.
I grabbed the tray.
He inhaled a breath, like he knew he was getting what he wanted.
I raised the tray higher then slowly tilted it, letting everything roll off the plate and onto the floor between us, my eyes on his hood the entire time, listening to the food splatter all over the floor in front of my bed. I turned the tray completely upside down before I released it and let it fall to the floor.
He was still.
There was a chance he would hold me down and force himself on me, but I took the gamble anyway.
He stayed in the chair for a full minute.
Bethany had never mentioned the girls getting raped by the guards, but there was no way it didn’t happen, not when they weren’t unafraid to beat us, starve us, enslave us. I was prepared to fight him, dig my nails into his eyes and make him blind.
He rose to his feet.
I flinched slightly, anticipating him charging into me and holding me down.
But he stood over me and kicked the chair back. “Looks like you aren’t getting lunch tomorrow either.”
Fine with me.
He walked out and slammed the door behind him.
I finally let the air out of my lungs, let myself breathe normally, relaxed now that the danger had passed.
The food was still all over the floor.
I didn’t hesitate to eat what I could salvage.
My guard made good on his threat.
Everyone was given a tray—except me.
Bad behavior was punished with less food, but not no food entirely.
Bethany spoke when the coast was clear. “What happened?”
“My guard said he would give me dinner if I sucked his cock. You know what my answer was.”
“I’ve never seen anyone get no lunch…”
“What can I say? I’m a trendsetter.”
“Why does he hate you so much?”
“No idea.”
Bethany put a piece of bread in her hand, like she was attempting to share her food.
“Don’t,” I whispered. “I’m sure he’s waiting for you to do that. I’m fine, really.”
Bethany put the bread in her mouth instead.
In truth, I was starving, and knowing I wouldn’t get dinner tonight either made my stomach cramp. I’d salvaged the meat and potatoes from the floorboards, but now that I wasn’t getting enough calories on a regular basis, it really affected my body’s performance. It was harder to carry the boxes, and there were times I was so fatigued, I wasn’t sure if I could pick them up at all.
It was exactly what he wanted.
So I would be the next victim of the Red Snow.