"You became a cop to punish yourself, Sloane. You made a cage out of the rules and the laws. But you don't have to do that. You don't need to be punished. Justice won that night, I promise you."
I shook my head. "No. This isn't about Harvey Grier--it's not," I said, though he had raised no protest. "It's important to me, those rules, those codes. It's my life."
"And if I wanted you to be my life?"
His words, said so simply and plainly, were nothing more than a sucker punch. And I had to work not to shake. Not to cry out. Not to shout for him to please not say that again, because just the mere idea of it was too damn tempting--and I couldn't afford to be tempted.
Slowly, when I thought I could manage it, I shook my head. "We both know that's never going to happen." I felt the tears behind my eyes, and as I sat with ramrod posture, I kept my eyes wide open, determined not to cry.
He stood by the sink, his eyes firmly on my face. "I have never wanted a woman the way I want you," he said, his voice so full of promise and raw emotion that it almost broke me. "And I've never let a woman see into my cracks the way I have you. I understand your hesitations. I respect them. But know this. I'm damn well going to push against them."
I ran my fingers through my hair. "I'm tired. And I'm confused. I want to be with you, but I don't know how. I told you. This is the chasm, and I don't see a way across. I mean, Christ, Tyler. You're running an extortion scheme."
"No," he said. "Not extortion. Those tapes weren't for money, but for protection."
"What do you mean?"
"You might be surprised to know that not all politicians are fine, upstanding citizens. As it happens, the newly elected Alderman Bentley used to be a cog in a wheel that the guys and I ran."
"The kind of wheel that I'd disapprove of?"
He hesitated only a second, then said flatly, "A money laundering scheme. Bentley was right in the thick of it. And that means he knows too much about our operation. And now that he's an elected official, he may be inclined to try to use that information to gain pull."
"Use it and he exposes himself."
"Maybe. But it might be worth it to him."
"But it wouldn't be worth it if those pictures got out," I said.
"That's the plan. He stays quiet, the pictures are never released."
"That doesn't make it any less illegal."
Tyler shrugged. "Not really my main concern."
"What is?"
"Lately? Lately, it's you."
"Tyler ..." I felt like a hand was squeezing tight around my heart.
"It's true. It's why I'm here running off at the mouth. Do you know how much I'm risking letting it out in the open? Because when you get right down to it, what I've told you could destroy us. And I've never been so careless before."
"Why now?" I asked, both dreading and craving the answer.
"Because I'm an idiot," he said. "I'm an idiot for falling in love with a cop."
"Tyler." Just one word, but it was full of passion and apology and, yes, love.
He moved from the kitchen to kneel in front of me. "This is more than a game to me, Sloane. And you're more than just a prize. I want a woman who burns with me. Who melts into me. Who fits into all my hollow places. That's you, Sloane. Do you see that? Do you know it? You're my everything. You're my whole world."
I swallowed, overwhelmed with emotions--confusion, fear, love.
He rose up and brought his mouth to mine, his kiss both possessive and tender.
"I told you once I want no secrets between us," he said, as he trailed his fingers up and down my arm. "I meant it. I want to tell you everything. I won't bore you with a laundry list, but if you have questions, just ask."
I had so many, but I didn't know where to begin, or even if I wanted to ask them all. "You said Destiny was clean. But it wasn't always, was it?"
"No," he said.
"And it is now because of Evan. He gave it up for Angie, didn't he? Because what he does could damage her father."
"Yes. And I think the thrill was fading. He likes business, plain and simple. I like taking a different approach."
"Could you do that, though?" I asked, realizing how much hope was lacing my voice. "Could you give it up?"
He was silent so long I thought he wasn't going to answer. When he did, it wasn't the response I'd expected. "Could you give up being a cop?"
"It's not the same. I'm enforcing the law. You're twisting it around to your liking. And you can't do that. You can't push the envelope and not expect to pay." I licked my lips. "That's the crux of it. I love you, too, Tyler. Desperately. It amazes me because it's hit me so hard and so fast. But it's true." I sighed. "Even so, it's not enough, because I don't know how to get past this."
"Then we don't get past it," he said. "Not yet. We've been living in a bubble, sweetheart. Let's stay in it for just a little longer."
I drew in a breath and considered. I only had a few more days before I had to report back, anyway. And the truth was, I would do anything for a few more days with this man.
"All right," I said as I glanced around my crappy apartment. "But can we stay at The Drake?"
Chapter Twenty-Five
The condo that Angie and Evan shared was about the most amazing place I'd ever seen. It was huge, and one side of the living room was made up of a wall of windows that looked out over Lake Michigan, and the boats lit up on the water at night made it look like there were stars both below and above us.
"It was my uncle's," Angie explained. "I inherited it. And since Evan loves the place as much as I do, we mostly live here."
They had invited Tyler and me over for drinks, along with Cole and Kat. Kat had arrived before us, so I got a good look at her face when Cole entered. Attraction, fascination, and then--when Cole told Angie that someone named Bree wouldn't be joining him--disappointment.
I liked Cole--he had a straightforward manner that I appreciated, and a deep-seated passion that I admired. I'd seen some of his art, and had been shocked by its beauty and power, the imagery in contrast somehow to the burly man with the dragon tattoo. I thought also of what I knew about Cole and Michelle and the dungeon. And then I said a little prayer for Kat. But whether it was for her to figure a way into a complicated man like Cole, or for her to just move on, I really didn't know.
"Got any beer, Dragonbait?" Cole asked Angie.
"You know we do. Help yourself."
He paused by me on the way to the kitchen. "I'm glad you and Tyler got clear," he said. And then he surprised me by pulling me into a quick, tight hug.
While Cole went to the kitchen, the rest of us followed Evan and Angie through a living room filled with art, most in the kind of frames that each had their own spotlight.
One piece, however, stood out. It was a handmade quilt, framed and hung just off the living room in an adjoining hallway. "Isn't that like Tyler's quilt?"
"The same woman gave them to all three of the guys," Angie said.
I glanced curiously at Tyler. "Really? How interesting."
Kat snorted, but Tyler only rolled his eyes. "Mind out of the gutter, Detective. They were handmade by the grandmother of the very first girl we pulled out of the trafficking scheme."
"They're very special," Evan added.
"They are," I agreed. "You touched a lot of lives."
Evan turned to Angie. "Wh
y don't you girls head up to the patio. We'll bring the drinks up."
The patio turned out to be a massive outdoor living area on the roof of the high-rise. Angie and I sat on two of the plush outdoor sofas, and Kat plunked herself down on the ground. "I thought you were running a con," Kat said to me. "When I first saw you, I mean."
"A con?"
She shrugged. "I knew the guys were keeping an eye on you, and I couldn't figure out why. I didn't know you were a cop, so I figured you were trying to scam them. I couldn't believe that anyone would be stupid enough to think they could pull a con on those three and get away with it. Trust me, I know."
"Yeah? How?"
"Well, not personally," Kat amended. "My dad did a real estate deal with Tyler years ago, but I wasn't involved. I got to hear about it from Dad's end, though." She grinned. "That's how I know you don't play mind games with Tyler Sharp."
"He took your dad?"
"Let's just say he didn't let my dad take him."
"That sounds like Tyler," I said, and couldn't help but wonder which side of the line Kat's father fell on.
The guys were back soon with the drinks, and the evening fell into an easy rhythm. They talked about work and various projects, all of which sounded legitimate, and it occurred to me to wonder just how much Kat knew about what these men did.
As for Kat and Angie, they asked me all sorts of questions about being a cop and about stripping at Destiny. I had to admit, it made for an interesting mix of topics.
I was on my second glass of wine when Kat stood up and said she had to go. "Work," she said, then pulled a face. "There really needs to be an easier way to make a living."
She headed out, and Angie and I moved to the glass barrier that shielded the patio from the abyss below. "He's gone on you," Angie said, as soon as we were out of earshot of the men.
"It's mutual," I said. "But it doesn't matter. Our lives just don't intersect, you know? And I'll be back in Indiana by the end of the week."
"Maybe it'll work out," she said. "I didn't think it would for Evan and me, but here we are."
I shifted to look at her better. "Can I ask you something? I know your dad's a senator," I began after she nodded. "And I know the guys are into a few things that are less than legitimate."
She cocked her head. "You figure?"
"Tyler told me," I said.
"Oh." Her eyes widened. "Well, that is interesting."
I grinned wryly. "Yeah, well. I imagine Evan's clean. What with your dad being who he is. Am I right?"