Shock rippled down her spine. Was that what she was doing with Grady? Not accepting that they were different now? That they had matured and learned a lot about living? She certainly hadn’t forgiven him. Was she meant to? Might help if she did. Might wipe out some of the hurt and anger that had resurfaced in the past two days. Might stop the need for him that crawled through her body, warmed her blood and started an ache in her sex whenever he was near.
‘It’s twelve point one.’
‘What?’
‘My glucose,’ Campbell grumbled.
‘Let’s double-check that.’ She wouldn’t put it past Campbell to have grabbed any figure out of the air.
*
Two house calls and one hundred and fifty kilometres later Sasha sped into the parking area behind the medical centre and leapt out of her vehicle.
‘Please, Flipper, please, please, kick me. Hard as you like. Bruise my ribs. I don’t care. I need to know you’re okay.’ Please.
She skidded on the mat at the back door, righted herself and raced down the hall towards the nurses’ room. ‘Jess, where are you?’ She spilled into the room and ran slap bang into Grady.
Strong hands gripped her shoulders, held her upright. ‘Hey, slow down. What’s up?’
‘Where’s Jess?’ She wriggled out of his hold and peered behind him, looking for her midwife. ‘Jess, I can’t feel Flipper moving. She hasn’t kicked for hours. Is she all right? Tell me I’m being silly, that she’s fine. Jess?’
‘Anything out of the ordinary happen today?’ Jessica stood up from the desk and came straight to her, reached for her hand at the same moment Grady caught her shoulders again, this time from behind.
‘I—I picked up J-Josh T-Templeton for a cuddle and my back t-tweaked.’ Why had she bent down to lift the overweight toddler? Because he’s so cute and he was holding his arms up, begging for a hug. ‘Have I hurt my b-baby?’ She’d never lift another child, another thing, until after her baby girl was born. She’d sit in a chair and read a book twenty-four seven. Promise. Just be okay, baby.
Jess squeezed her hand. ‘Deep breaths, Sasha. How long exactly since you last felt her move?’
‘I don’t want to breathe. I want to feel my baby moving.’
‘Sasha, how long?’ Grady echoed Jess’s question. Those strong fingers on her shoulders began making soothing circular movements.
She didn’t want to be soothed. She wanted Flipper kicking as though her life depended on it. She’d take all the pounding she could get to know her baby was safe, and only taking a longer than usual rest. ‘Jess, Grady, do something.’
Her knees buckled under her. Grady caught her, held her tight, backed her against his chest. She tried to soak up his strength but it wasn’t enough. It didn’t answer the overriding question. Was her baby all right? Was she alive?
‘Easy, Sasha. I’ll examine you immediately but there’s probably nothing to worry about.’ His tone was soothing but that didn’t help either.
Grady was going to examine her? Not in a million years. That would be too weird.
This isn’t about you. Or Grady. Your baby’s life is all that matters. Who examines you is irrelevant as long as they know what they’re doing.
Jessica glared at Grady. ‘You’re overriding my position?’
Sasha pulled out of Grady’s arms, her hands holding her belly. Waiting for a movement, imagining one and knowing she was wrong. Wanting didn’t mean getting. She looked from Jess to Grady.
‘We’ll examine Sasha.’
Something in his eyes must’ve made Jess feel okay with that because she backed off immediately and gave Sasha a loving smile. ‘Let me help you up on the bed.’
But before she could dredge up any kind of answer Grady had taken her arm to lead her across the room. She wanted to relax in against Grady’s body and feel safe. But she couldn’t. Not when Flipper needed all her focus. Flipper. ‘Oh, no.’ A chill sliced through her, lifted bumps on her skin. ‘Last night I told Flipper to stop swimming and go to sleep. This is my fault,’ she wailed. Where had that primal sound come from? Had she made it? Her bottom lip trembled so badly she had to bite down hard.
‘No, Sasha, this is not your fault. Babies do this. Chances are your little girl is absolutely fine.’ He spoke evenly, quietly. Professionally. He was being a doctor, no more, no less.
That calmed her somewhat, helped her take that breath Jess wanted, got her brain working so she could answer the question she hadn’t got to yet. ‘I’m not sure of the last time I felt her move. I think I might’ve while I was with Campbell McRae.’ Her lip trembled again. ‘But I can’t be a hundred per cent sure.’
‘Was that your last call?’ Grady’s hand under her elbow gave her balance as she climbed onto the bed, feeling more than ever like a heavily pregnant hippopotamus.
‘I did two more, and then had to drive back from Paton’s Rock,’ she answered.
‘So a couple of hours all up.’ Jess stood on the other side of the bed. ‘The usual thing to do now is make you lie down for one or two hours and relax—’
‘Relax?’ she shrieked. ‘When I haven’t felt anything from my baby all that time? I don’t think so.’
Jess’s calm smile didn’t help a bit. ‘Let me finish. You’ve been racing around all day, visiting patients, right?’
Sasha pursed her lips and glared at her friend. ‘So?’
‘So when you’re busy you won’t always notice baby’s movements as much as when you’re taking it easy. Lie back, Sasha, place your hands on your tummy and wait quietly.’
‘Since when have I ever done quietly?’ she grumbled, but lay back on the pillows.
‘Since you left that loser and came home,’ Jessica told her.
My own fault for asking. Jess had never hidden the truth, at least not about greaseball whom she’d never met but had an opinion about anyway. ‘T
hanks, pal.’
‘You’re welcome.’ Jess gave her a big smile. ‘Now, relax, will you?’
Beside her Grady lifted her wrist, pressed his fingers onto her radial artery. She watched his lips moving as he counted her pulse. His eyes had become inscrutable. Because of that loser comment? This was probably as strange a situation for Grady as it was for her. But if she could handle it then so could he. Only the baby mattered. Not his bruised ego or hers. Despite last night’s conversation about the past they were trying to be friends, and this was a good way to start. Don’t think about the kiss.
‘Pulse is normal.’ He laid her wrist down as though it was made of the finest crystal.
‘Why did you even take it? I wouldn’t have thought it necessary.’
‘Gives me something to do.’ He gave a deprecating smile. ‘Jessica’s got everything covered.’
‘What about listening in? Flipper might have something to say.’
‘Why not? Can’t do any harm.’ Friendliness had taken over his gaze.
But when Sasha tugged her top up, exposing her rounded belly for all to see, it was Grady’s bobbing Adam’s apple that caught her attention. So he was having massive trouble with the situation. She shouldn’t have suggested he do this bit. Should’ve asked Jess.
She turned in entreaty to Jess. Her friend nodded once in understanding and shoved the earpieces in her ears before placing the cold bell on her abdomen.
Sasha crossed her fingers and held her breath, and bit down on that quivering lip again. Please, please, please, please…
She watched Jess closely, looking for any change in her eyes or mouth, her expression. She knew Jess well, had learned to read her over the months as their friendship had deepened. But she saw nothing. Panic roared up her throat. She bit down hard to block off a cry. Her hands turned into fists and she thumped the bed at her sides.
‘Shh.’ Grady’s hand covered one of hers. ‘You’re making it hard for Jessica to hear anything.’