Her All Along

To be clear, I wasn’t the little ray of sunshine.

“Pop-Pop!” Grace yelled. “Unka!”

The two joined us in the living room. James slumped down in his chair, and Darius found a spot on the couch. Grace jumped over to him first and babbled animatedly about something only she understood. And when she didn’t get the reaction she was hoping for—more like a blank face and a hesitant, “Uh, sure. Yeah, I agree with you.”—she huffed and slid off the couch to make her way to James instead. He was better at humoring her and decided that her incoherent ramblings always meant that she wanted to talk about whatever project James was working on in the garage.

Darius nodded at the notepad on my lap. “Final preparations?”

I inclined my head. “Elise kindly pointed out that all smart people had to-do lists.”

He snorted in amusement. “Yeah, I’ve heard her kind hints before.” He leaned back a bit and settled one foot over his knee, and his arms extended across the back of the couch. “So, what’s left? Y’all have been running around all week.”

To put it mildly. “Housing. There’re enough options in Berkeley to ease my worries. Finding a place there won’t be difficult—it’ll just cost me.”

“I don’t get why you don’t stay with Ry and Angel,” he responded.

I’d already gotten chewed out by Ryan himself about that, but it was simple to me. “Elise needs peace and quiet for her studies.” And the reality was, Ryan and Angel had a small two-bedroom apartment above their bar. Elise stayed in the guest room. Adding a young child—and me—to that would take small and cozy and shoot it straight into crowded and too loud.

“I guess that makes sense,” Darius replied. “She’s starting her business economics class this semester, right?”

“Yes, so the last thing she needs is a screaming toddler nearby.”

“That’s the last thing anyone needs, buddy,” he laughed.

I smirked and shook my head.

“Oh, you’ll see one day, boy,” James said gruffly. Grace was getting cuddly on his lap, and it made me check my watch. Too early for her to get tired, damn it. She’d be cranky for the rest of the evening now.

“I won’t see shit,” Darius answered firmly.

James didn’t bother with a response. He addressed me instead. “Don’t be surprised if we join you after Christmas. Mary’s been houndin’ me for a time-share down there.”

“What the hell?” Darius frowned.

I was surprised too.

James shrugged a little and tucked Grace into his arms. “Only a matter of time before Ryan’s girl starts squeezing out kids. If he’s anything like me, he’ll want a big brood of his own, and he’ll have no patience once the first kid arrives.”

Ryan was a lot like his father. And James and Mary had welcomed four boys into the world in a span of five or six years. Then they’d waited a decade before they had Lias.

“Ma!” Darius yelled. “If Ethan and Ave give you more grandkids, will y’all stay in town more?”

I laughed.

Mary popped her head into the living room and narrowed her eyes at James. “What’re you talking about?”

“Nothin’,” James lied.

Mary huffed. “Well, I’ll go with whatever answer produces more grandkids.”

Shocking.

“I’ll have a word with Ethan,” Darius promised. “I’m not ready to encourage Ave in that department yet.”

“He doesn’t need it!” Elise hollered from the kitchen. “I’ll be encouraging him plenty as soon as we move back home.”

This goddamn family. Christ. I had no words.

There were no complaints from me, though. If anything, I was looking forward to that encouragement from Elise.

For the first time in my life, I was looking forward to a lot of things.

Thirty

“Daddy’s coming for you, Grace!”

“Nooo!” She laughed like crazy and tried to run faster.

She was such a sight. I’d taken countless pictures of her running around being a goofball today. Her dark curls bounced with every step, her cheeks were rosy from exertion, and I had to admit her wardrobe had received a nice upgrade since Elise started taking over. The boots, the leggings, the undershirt, and that cardigan had been a parting gift from Elise. She’d said they would be perfect for our ventures into the national parks along the way on our journey.

I eventually caught up to my little speedster and picked her up, and she squealed happily and became her own airplane. Arms extended, she urged me to go faster, faster, faster. I ran with her over my head toward the next big tree where I had to take a breather.

“’Gain, Dada! Go’gain!”

I chuckled, out of breath, and positioned her on my hip. “Let me breathe first.” This was supposed to be a short visit, so I’d only brought my daypack from the car. Diapers, water, animal crackers, wipes, and a banana—always there wherever I went with my girl. “Do you want a snack, Grace?”

“Nuh-uh.” She was peering up at the tall trees around us, and she pointed. “Big!”