Origin (Scales 'n' Spells 1)
Page 126
“You can’t honestly tell me you’re surprised.”
Cameron groaned softly. “No, not exactly. I mean, I campaigned hard for him to date me. It’s not like I went into this blind, as it was mostly me to begin with. It just seems fast.”
“Some know right away. Your sister—”
Cameron huffed a laugh. “Cassie is different. She’s always been different. She’s fearless. She has no problem jumping straight into something with a woman. Doesn’t seem to care if her heart’s gonna get stomped on. She just leaps.”
“Do you think Alric is going to stomp on your heart?”
Sighing, Cameron dropped his head back against the seat and closed his eyes. Would Alric intentionally hurt him? Never. There was zero doubt in his mind Alric would do anything and everything to keep him safe and happy. “No. No, it’s more the culmination of everything on top of what I feel for Alric. Which is a lot. Because choosing Alric means I’m immigrating to another country, learning a new culture, a new language—all of which is stressful and huge by itself—and to top that off, I’ll be gaining two new jobs. TWO. Because being a mage is only one job that I come with. Being Alric’s mate also means learning how to be a co-ruler of a clan, and that’s…whoa. Just a lot to take in all at once, you know?”
“I do not discount what you are saying, as you’re perfectly correct. It is a great deal to consider. But you’re wrong to think Alric would demand all of that from you at once.” Cameron opened his eyes to see Dieter give a little shake of his head. “You will have every ounce of support that he can give you, young mage. For that matter, the entire clan is behind you. I don’t want you to hesitate to choose Alric because you feel overwhelmed.”
“I can’t help feeling overwhelmed, Dieter. Like, that emotion isn’t easily shuffled off to the side.”
“I do understand. What I’m trying to convey is that you need to speak more candidly to Alric about this. Your hesitation with him has not gone unnoticed, and he fears you might have doubts. Or that you’re second-guessing your choice in him.”
Cameron jerked around in alarm. “What? What have I said that gave him that impression?”
“It’s not what you’ve said, but what you’ve failed to say. I believe Alric has known you are his mate since that first day, but he’s been terrified of making a mistake too similar to the one that cost him his family. Not to mention he doesn’t believe he deserves someone as perfect as you.”
A loud scoffing noise erupted from Cameron’s throat, and he shook his head. “I am not perfect.”
“True, but you are in Alric’s eyes.” Dieter paused, and his smile softened to something a little dreamy. “The same way I am sure no one is as perfect as Lisette.”
Insecurities. Cameron sometimes forgot those rode along in Alric’s brain, whispering evil things. He’d been so wrapped up in the huge consequences of his actions that he’d failed to really think about how Alric perceived all of this. Oh damn. He really didn’t mean to give the impression that he had doubts. Well, he did have a few, but they were perfectly natural and could be dealt with.
One doubt in particular reared its head. Cameron hoped and prayed that he and Alric were meant to be, but really, he had no baseline to guide him. How did the dragons and mages know? With such confidence? “When did you know Lisette was your mate?”
Dieter slowed the car for a particularly tight turn and lowered the visor against the glare of the sun. “It took a little while. I was young and brash. Best friend to the king of the Burkhard clan and his most trusted advisor, I was sure I knew everything. She was a young, know-it-all mage we’d met on a trip to England. We butted heads from the first moment. I was sure there was no one more insufferable and she thought the same of me. Every time we spoke, it was like thunder rumbled through the air. And yet, when it was time to leave, I couldn’t. My human brain was in denial, but my dragon knew she was mine. I had to take her home with me.”
“What about Lisette? Did she know?”
“Luckily, she did prove to be smarter than me.” Dieter looked over at Cameron and grinned broadly. “She’d figured it out. When I arrived at her home to ask her to return to Germany with me, she was already packed and waiting.”
Cameron snorted. Yeah, that sounded like Lisette. But his happiness was short lived. It drained away when he thought about being Alric’s mate, because it wasn’t just about being mate to a dragon. He would be the mate of the king. That was big. Huge. His talk with Lisette had helped him get perspective on that, but it was still hard to wrap his head around. Hell, his parents didn’t even trust him to manage his own life, making all the big decisions for him. And yet this clan was eager to have him as a leader? It really made no fucking sense.