The Seventh Dwarf (Artemis Fowl 1.5)
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Able to throw fireballs
They go on all fours when speed is important
Forked tongue
Less than a metre tall
Slimey, fire-proof skin
Character:
Not clever, but cunning Argumentative Ambitious Power-hungry
Loves:
Fire
A good argument
Power
Situations to avoid:
Don't get in the way if they're throwing a fireball
Centaurs
Distinguishing features:
Half-man, half-pony Hairy - obviously! Hoofs can get very dry
Character:
Extremely intelligent
Vain
Paranoid
Kind
Computer geek
Loves:
Showing off Inventing
Situations to avoid:
They aren't very dangerous physically, but they will sulk if you criticize their latest invention, mess with their hard drive or borrow their hoof moisturizer
Sprites
Distinguishing features:
About one metre tall Pointy ears Green skin Wings
Character:
Average intelligence
Generally happy-go-lucky attitude
Loves:
Flying - more than anything else under or above the earth
Situations to avoid:
Watch out for low-flying sprites - they don't always look where they're going
Pixies
Distinguishing features:
About one metre tall
Pointy ears
Apart from their ears and their height, pixies look almost human
Character:
Extremely intelligent No morals Cunning Ambitious Greedy
Loves:
Power and money Chocolate
Situations to avoid:
Never get on the wrong side of a pixie, especially one as clever and ruthless as Opal Koboi, unless you are as brilliant as Artemis Fowl, of course
Interviews
Interview With Artemis Fowl II
If you weren't a criminal mastermind, what would you most like to do?
I think there is a lot of work to be done in the field of psychology. If I did not have my criminal plots to occupy my time, I think I would devote my energies to putting right some of the mistakes made by Misters Freud and Jung.
What do you really think of Captain Holly Short?
I have immense respect for Captain Short and I often wish she would come over to my side, as it were. But I know she never will. She has too many principles. And if she ever lost those principles, perhaps I would lose my respect for her too.
You have travelled a great deal. Where is your favourite place in the world and why?
My favourite place in the world is Ireland. As the fairy People say, it is the most magical place. Its landscapes are the most inspirational in the world. And the people are witty and genuine, though we do have a dark side.
What was your most embarrassing moment?
I once scored a mere ninety-nine per cent on a mathematics assignment. I was mortified. I had forgotten to round up the third decimal place. Imagine my embarrassment.
What is your favourite book?
My favourite book this week is The Lord of the Flies by William Golding. It is a fascinating psychological study of a group of boys stranded on an island. I can't help thinking that if I had been on that island, I would be running the place in a week.
What is your favourite song?
I rarely listen to popular music with the exception of David Bowie, who is quite a chameleon. One never knows quite what to expect. I think Bowie is a fascinating individual and I am thinking of approaching him with a scheme of mine for rediscovering a lost Mozart opera, which, of course, I have written. My favourite song of Mister Bowie's is'It's No Game Part 2', from the Scary Monsters CD.
What keeps you awake at night?
My plans.They run around my head at night keeping me awake.There is one more thing that keeps me awake. Sometimes I feel bad about the things I have done. If this feeling of guilt strikes, I do a quick online check of my bank balance, and it soon goes away.
What is your most treasured possession?
My most treasured possession is a cache of LEP equipment that Butler confiscated from a fairy Retrieval team.There are a thousand inventions in there that have never been seen by humans.These will be my retirement fund.
Who is your best friend?
I believe that we agreed that this question would not be asked. If my enemies discovered who my best friend is, they could get to me through him or her. Let me just say that my best friend is never far away and has been with me since the day of my birth.
Interview With Captain Holly Short
Do you mind being the only female elf in the LEPrecon Unit?
Some days it's a pain. It would be nice to have a female colleague to talk to at the end of a long shift. In the beginning some of the male officers used to give me a hard time. Now they're too busy chasing my flight records to insult me.
What was your proudest moment?
My proudest moment was when we shut down the goblin revolution. If those scaly gangsters had managed to take over Police Plaza, our entire culture would have been destroyed.
What was your most embarrassing moment?
I got bitten in the behind by a swear toad once. We were sweeping a tunnel for a rogue troll and the little guy just popped out of a hole and took a chunk out of me. It was a small chunk, but the venom caused a lot of swelling. I will never live that day down. I just hope Artemis Fowl doesn't find out about it.
You often get into trouble with Commander Root for not following the rules. Did you used to get into trouble at school for not following the rules too?
My father always taught me to do what's right, no matter what the cost. And that's what I do. Rules are important, but the right thing is more important. Sometimes that got me in
trouble at school. I can never keep my mouth shut if I see someone being bullied or punished unjustly. It's just the way I am.
What was your favourite subject at school?
I loved virtual school.You get to put on a V-Helmet and travel through history.Those helmets are amazing - they even have special air filters so you can smell the period you are studying.
What do you really think of Artemis Fowl?
I'm in two minds about Artemis. Half of me wants to hug him and the other half wants to throw him in a cell for a few months to teach him a lesson. For all his brains, Artemis does not understand the consequences of his schemes. Every time he sets off on an adventure, someone seems to get hurt. And Butler is not always
going to be around to save him. And I'm not always going to be around to save Butler.
What are your hobbies?
I read a lot. Mostly the classics - Horri Antowitz is a good author, and Burger Melviss. I like a good thriller. I also like crunchball and I play in the police league. I'm the second dunker, which can really take it out of a girl.
What is your most treasured possession?
I still have the recon acorns given to me by Commander Root himself. No matter how many medals and promotions I earn, the first acorns are still the best.
What keeps you awake at night?
Some nights I lie awake and think about what the humans are doing to the planet.And I wonder how long will it be before they find out about us. Some nights, if I'm feeling a bit paranoid, then I swear I can hear human crafts over my head. Digging. Burrowing.
Who is your best friend?
Tough one. I'm going to have to go for two: Foaly and Captain Trouble Kelp. They have both saved my life more than once. And they stuck by me in the bad times, when everyone else had written me off as a failure.
Interview With Butler
What are your three top tips for being a successful bodyguard?
Train hard: there is no substitute for knowledge.
Listen to your sensei: they have the experience that you need.
Be prepared to sacrifice everything for the job.
You are very close to your younger sister, Juliet. Were you pleased that she wanted to follow in your footsteps and do you think she will make a good bodyguard?
I was hoping that Juliet would pick another profession. Juliet has too much life in her to smother beneath a bodyguard's uniform. I think that my little sister may still decide to pick a less dangerous profession like wrestling.
What is your most treasured possession?
My most treasured possession is etched into my skin. It is a blue diamond tattoo from Madam Ko's Bodyguard Academy. I was the youngest ever graduate of the academy and this tattoo gives me access to circles most people don't even know exist. It's like carrying a resume on your arm.
What is your favourite book?
I don't have much time to read.Artemis's schemes keep me on my toes. Mostly I read helicopter manuals and keep an eye on weather reports and current affairs. If I do have a moment to myself, I do enjoy a good romance story. If you tell a soul, I will hunt you down.