The Time Paradox (Artemis Fowl 6)

“This is not a shampoo commercial. Please stop flicking your hair.”

Holly was bent almost double, her hand on her heart.

“Hurry,” she groaned, “or I’ll have to go without you.”

“Please,” Artemis pleaded.“We need to go. It’s a matter of life and death.”

Young Artemis was unmoved. “I had a feeling you would be back. This is where it all began, right on this spot. I reviewed the security tapes, and you simply appeared in this room. Then you followed me to Africa, so I thought if I saved the creature’s life you might end up back here with my lemur. We simply blocked our heat signatures and waited. And here you are.”

“That’s pretty flimsy reasoning,” said Artemis the elder. “We were obviously after the lemur. Once we had the lemur, why would we return here?”

“I realize the logic was flawed, but I had nothing to lose. And, as we can see, a lot to gain.”

Holly did not have the patience for a Fowl gloating session. “Artemis, I know you have a heart. You’re a good person even if you don’t know it yet. You sacrificed your diamonds to save my life. What will it take for you to let us go?”

Young Artemis considered this for an infuriating minute and a half.

“The truth,” he said eventually. “I need to know the absolute truth about all of this. What kind of creature are you? Why does he look so familiar? What makes the lemur so special? Everything.”

Artemis the elder clutched Jayjay to his chest. “Get me a pair of scissors,” he said.

Opal ran into the manor, casually squashing the magical nausea that flared upon entering a human dwelling without permission.

A time stream, she thought, almost giggling with excitement. Finally I can test my theories.

The manipulation of time had long been Opal’s ultimate goal. To be able to control one’s passage through time was the greatest power. But her magic was not strong enough without the lemur. It took teams of LEP warlocks to slow time down for a few hours; the magic required to open a door to the tunnel was stupendous. It would be easier to shoot down the moon.

Opal tapped this into her notepad.

Reminder. Shoot down the moon? Viable?

But if she could gain entrance to the tunnel, Opal felt sure that she would quickly master the science involved.

It’s more than likely an intuitive organism; and after all, I am a genius.

She scaled the stairs, mindless of the scuff marks the high human steps inflicted on her new boots. Mervall and Descant trailed behind, surprised at this lack of footwear prudence.

“I got thrown into the pigpen for boots,” muttered Descant. “Now she’s scratching those ones on the stairs. Typical Koboi inconsistency. I think I’m getting an ulcer.”

Opal reached the upper landing and raced immediately through an open doorway.

“How does she know that’s the right room?” wondered Descant.

“Oh, I don’t know,” said Mervall, resting his hands on his knees. Scaling human steps is not easy for pixies. Big heads, short legs, tiny lungs. “Maybe it’s the magical red glow coming from the doorway, or perhaps it’s the deafening howl of the temporal winds.”

Descant nodded. “You could be right, brother. And don’t think I don’t know sarcasm when I hear it.”

Opal traipsed from the room, her expression sour.

“They have gone,” she announced. “And the tunnel is about to close. Also my boots are ruined. So, boys, I am looking for someone to blame.”

The Brill brothers took one look at each other, then turned and ran as fast as their tiny legs would carry them.

Not fast enough.

CHAPTER 14

THE HOLE IN THE ACE

Holly felt herself relax as soon as they entered the stream.

Safe for the moment.

Jayjay was safe. Soon Artemis’s mother would be well, and when that was accomplished, Holly decided that she would punch her erstwhile friend in his smug face.

I did what I had to do, Artemis had said. And I would do it again.

And she had kissed him. Kissed him!

Holly understood Artemis’s motives, but it wounded her deeply that he had felt the need to blackmail her.

I would have helped anyway. Definitely.

Would you? Would you have disobeyed orders? Was Artemis right to do it his way?

These were questions that Holly knew would haunt her for years. If she had years left to her.

The journey was more arduous than before. The time stream was eroding her sense of self, and there was a syrupy temptation to relax her concentration. Her world seemed less important wrapped in its sparkling waves. Being part of an eternal river would be a pleasant way to exist. And if the fairy races were wiped out by plague, what of it?

No1’s presence pricked her consciousness and bolstered her resolve. The little demon’s power was evident in the stream, a shimmering thread of crimson pulling them on through the miasma. Things moved in the shadows. Darting, sharp things. Holly sensed teeth and hooked fingers.

Had No1 mentioned something about quantum zombies? That was probably a joke. Please let that be a joke.

Concentrate! Holly told herself. Or you will be absorbed.

She could feel other presences traveling with her. Jayjay was surprisingly calm, considering his surroundings. Somewhere in the periphery was Artemis, his sense of purpose keen as a blade.

No1 is going to get a shock, thought Holly, when he sees us pop through.

No1 didn’t seem very shocked when the group tumbled from the stream, solidifying on the floor of Artemis’s study.

“See any zombies?” he asked with a spooky wiggling of his fingers.

“Thank the gods,” proclaimed Foaly from the television screens, then exhaled loudly through his broad nostrils. “That was the longest ten seconds of my life. Did you get the lemur?”

There was no need for an answer, as Jayjay decided he liked the sound of Foaly’s voice and gave the nearest screen a lick. The little primate’s tongue crackled, and he scampered back, shooting Foaly a glare.

“One lemur,” said the centaur. “No female?”

Holly shook the stars from her eyes, the fog from her brain. The stream lingered in her head like the last moments of sleep.

“No. No female. You’ll have to clone him.”

Foaly peered past Holly to the shuddering form on the ground behind her.

The centaur raised an eyebrow.

“I see we have an—”

“Let’s talk about that later,” said Holly sharply, interrupting the centaur. “For now we have work to do.”

Foaly nodded thoughtfully. “I’m guessing, from the look of things, that Artemis has a plan of some sort. Is that going to be a problem for us?”

“Only if we try to stop it,” said Holly.

Artemis took Jayjay into his arms, stroking the little lemur’s Mohawk and calming him with a rhythmic clicking of his tongue.

Holly felt that she too would be calmed—not by Artemis’s clicking, but by the sight of her own face in the mirror. She was herself again; her one-piece fit snugly. A grown woman. No more teenage confusion. She would feel even better once she retrieved her gear. There was nothing like a Neutrino on the hip for a self-confidence boost.

“Time to see Mother,” said Artemis grimly, selecting a suit from the wardrobe. “How much fluid should I administer?”

“It’s powerful stuff,” said Foaly, entering some calculations on his keyboard.“Two cc’s. No more. There is a syringe gun in Holly’s medi-kit on the bedside table. Be very careful with the brain drain. There’s an anaesthetic tab in there too. Give Jayjay a swab, and he won’t feel a thing.”

“Very well,” Artemis said, pocketing the kit. “I shall go in alone. I do hope Mother recognizes me.”

“So do I,” agreed Holly. “Or she may object to lemur brain juice being injected into her by a total stranger.”

Artemis’s hand hovered over the crystal doorknob on hi

s parents’ bedroom door. In its facets he could see a dozen reflections of his own face. Each one was drawn and worried.

Last chance. My last chance to save her.

I am forever trying to save people, he thought. I’m supposed to be a criminal. Where did it all go wrong?

No time for drifting. There was more at stake here than gold or notoriety. His mother was dying, and her salvation was perched on Artemis’s shoulder, searching his scalp for ticks.

Artemis closed his fingers over the knob. Not another moment to waste on thoughts; time now for action.

The room seemed colder than he remembered, but this was doubtless his imagination.

All minds play tricks. Even mine. The perceived cold is a projection of my mood, nothing more.

His parents’ bedroom was rectangular in shape, stretching along the west wing from front to rear. It was actually more of an apartment than a room, with a lounge area and office corner. The large four-poster bed was angled so that tinted light from a medieval stained-glass porthole would fall across the studded headboard in summer.

Artemis placed his feet carefully on the rug, like a ballet dancer, avoiding the vine pattern in the weave.

Step on a vine, count to nine.

Bad luck was the last thing he needed.