If she believed he would head east again for any reason, of course she’d play safe where her heart was concerned. He would.
You already are. You’re not calling Bren and laying everything out there for her to see how much you want it to work between you.
‘Dad.’ Dylan stamped his foot. ‘Come on.’
Since he’d been so distracted, Hunter let Dylan get away with that one. Picking up the beer, he ruffled his boy’s hair. ‘We’re outta here.’
‘Why doesn’t Poppy want to see me any more? I love her.’
‘She loves you too, buddy, but sometimes everyone gets very busy and there’s no time to visit.’ And sometimes people just had to take the raging bull by its horns and risk everything. ‘We’ll stop in and say hello on the way back from Jess’s.’
‘Yippee.’
If only he could please everyone as easily.
CHAPTER NINE
BRENNA WHISKED THE softened butter to a cream, added vanilla and then icing sugar. She was probably about to make a fool of herself, but some things were worth the risk. She’d kept her word and spent days thinking about Hunter and their future, all the time knowing she had to talk to him and tell him everything about how she felt and apologise for the past.
Icing sugar flew through the air, and she slowed the beating she was giving the icing enough to save most of it for the cake and not the walls.
Poppy sat up on her haunches, watching every move, waiting expectantly.
‘I’m not giving you the whisk to lick, Pops.’ She’d have it herself. ‘But the good news is we’re going for a walk as soon as I’ve iced the cake.’ Around to Hunter’s house with her peace offering. Now the procrastinating was over, it was time to step up and lay her heart on the line. At least then she’d know for sure where her future lay.
Banana cake with buttercream icing had been his favourite. She hoped it still was. Not that she believed a cake would win him over, but it might soften his stance when he remembered the other times she’d made it for him, and allow her to apologise for leaping to conclusions. Conclusions that might turn out to be right, but she’d finally realised she had to ask him, not blindly accuse him.
She owed Geoff Carr. His cycling accident had brought her to her senses. That and her mother’s quiet way of putting everything into words that registered through the pain and confusion that had taken over her mind these past weeks. She didn’t need to throw herself down mountainsides to prove she could cope with anything. She’d survived her birth mother’s betrayal and her father’s death. She’d even made it past her and Hunter breaking up, maybe not in one piece but she was here, doing well as an emergency doctor and surrounded by family and friends.
It was time to be realistic. That could’ve been her breaking her back the other day, or any of the days she’d skied, snowboarded, cycled or leapt out of planes. While not about to turn into a couch potato, she’d begun backing down on the need to throw herself at everything. It would break her mum’s heart if anything happened to her, and she couldn’t do that when Mum had accepted her as her own from the day Dad had introduced them. Neither did she want to hurt her sisters, or anyone else, or be beholden to whoever got the short straw and had to look after her if the worst happened.
Hunter had been correct when he’d said she was selfish. But at the time it had been the only way she’d managed. With Dad gone from her mentally and her family trying to cope, there’d been no one to talk to about how much she loved Hunter despite him walking away.
‘Walkies.’ She rubbed Poppy’s head as she licked the whisk, trying to ignore the longing in her pet’s eyes. ‘You wouldn’t like buttercream icing.’
Poppy sank onto her belly and dropped her jaw onto her front legs with a sigh as if to say, ‘Try me.’
‘I know, it’s your favourite treat.’ Or would be if she got half a chance.
With the cake iced and put into a container that went into her backpack Brenna clipped Poppy’s lead to her collar and headed out the front door, glad to be doing something positive instead of mooching around the house.
By the time they reached Hunter’s front path sweat was dripping down her face and pouring between her breasts. When spring had decided to come out of hiding it had done so with a vengeance. ‘I could do with some iced water, Poppy. Bet you want a drink too.’
The house was all locked up. ‘So much for ice in my water.’ She found a hose lying in the back yard and turned on the tap for Poppy to lap at the water, then did the same for herself. Looking around the yard, she whistled.
Poppy stood alert, watching her.
‘Down, girl. Look how much work Hunter’s done out here. The garden’s enormous, like he plans on feeding the whole street with his vegetables.’ He hadn’t been wasting any time getting it prepared. A lightness she hadn’t felt in a long time crept up on her. Hunter was serious about this move. Just as he’d told her. As she’d refused to accept. ‘I’ve been an idiot.’
A cautious idiot looking after her own heart. Since that revealing conversation with her mum she’d spent days going over and over what Mum had advised, weighing up the consequences if it worked out—and if it didn’t. Every night as she lay in the dark, waiting for sleep to submerge her, she’d admit she had to give her and Hunter a chance. If, after six years, she still loved him, then what was there to lose? There was only one way to find out if he felt the same.
Except he wasn’t home.
Now what? She had a cake to deliver.
Just as well she’d put ice packs in with it because now she placed the container and packs on the back step in the shade. No need for a note; not that she had a pen or anything to write on.
Then she headed away, aiming for the beach where Poppy could chase her ball into the water and expend some of her energy.
* * *
‘Poppy’s not home,’ Hunter told Dylan after calling out and ringing the doorbell three times. Damn it. Where were they? As if he had any right to demand an answer, but now he’d made up his mind to talk to her and lay his heart out for her he couldn’t stand having to wait.
‘Can I see Brenna?’
‘She’s not here either. They’ve gone out together.’ He ignored the ache behind his ribs. When he’d finally found the courage to visit and beg for forgiveness she had to go out. Like a punishment, except there was no way she’d have known he’d call round.
‘I want to go to the beach.’
‘Might as well.’ Better than returning home to mope around the house, wondering where Bren had gone.
Pulling into the last vacant parking space at Kitsilano beach, Hunter hauled on the handbrake and got out to unclip Dylan’s seat belt.
Dylan slid out and stepped onto the sand. ‘Poppy,’ he shrieked, and began running.
‘Dylan, come back here now.’ Hunter chased after him. ‘Stop. Now.’
> ‘Poppy, Poppy, it’s me.’
Hunter skidded to a stop, his eyes finally lifting off his son and following the direction in which Dylan was scampering. Poppy was barrelling towards them.
Followed by Brenna, walking slowly with a cautious smile on her face.
He owed Dylan for suggesting the beach. ‘Hi,’ he said as he closed the gap.
‘Hello to you too.’
‘We’ve just been to your house.’
‘Poppy and I went by your place.’
They stared at each other.
He tried breathing but it wasn’t easy with all the longing building up in his chest. Longing to love and be loved. To share their lives as they’d always meant to do. Hell, he loved this woman. Always had, always would. How could he have been so callous to call her out on her activities? She was right, they were her choice. Just as when he’d headed back to Kamloops to help his parents had been his. Whether they were right or wrong, it didn’t matter, though the consequences of his actions had mattered big time. ‘I’m sorry. For everything. Right back six years.’
Bren stared at him, her eyes watering and her mouth softening. ‘So am I.’
‘You didn’t do anything wrong.’
‘Yes, I did. I could’ve followed you out to the Okanagan, finished my training in the hospital there, come home to visit Dad every second weekend.’ Brenna swiped her eyes with the back of a hand.
‘Don’t cry, Bren.’ He took a step towards her, his heart floundering. He’d lay the world at her feet if she’d have him back. ‘I wouldn’t have let you do that to your career. Or to your dad. It wouldn’t have been fair on anyone, and eventually it would’ve come between us.’ Would’ve caused irreparable damage.
‘None of it was fair.’ She took another swipe, but the tears kept coming. ‘I dug my heels in and stayed away, blaming you for everything.’