Song of the Fireflies

“Yeah. He really is.”

Silence fell between us again. I reached down and pulled a couple more blades of grass from beside my shoe.

“Elias?”

“Yeah?”

“What did you really bring me out here for?”

I had been trying to figure out how to tell her and also trying to figure out if this was what I needed to do.

Her hand touched my arm. I looked down at her and smiled faintly.

“Elias?” she asked again, being very patient.

“I’m going to be your witness,” I said.

She rose up from the ground, a blank look in her eyes.

“What the hell do you mean?” She knew exactly what I meant.

“I can say that I was there when it happened.” Already she was beginning to shake her head no. “No one can prove otherwise. I’ll tell the police, a jury, whoever I need to, that I was there and I saw what happened and that it was an accident.”

“No,” she said with complete resolution in her eyes. “I won’t let you do that.”

“You don’t have to let me,” I said. “I’m going to be your witness.”

She stood up and crossed her arms with her back to me.

“Bray?”

She snapped around. “No! I said no!” Her arms fell at her sides and her face was wild with anger and concern. “What if they ask you to take a lie detector test? Or, they get us in separate rooms—because they will—and one of us slips up and tells them something different?” Her voice began to rise. “Jesus, Elias! One tiny detail, one seemingly insignificant detail and they have us. They’ll have you. They’re trained to spot things like that! They’re trained to trip us up!”

I stood up in front of her. “We have some time while we’re still with Tate to get the story straight. Make it simple and straightforward. Don’t include a bunch of small details. Just give them the basic picture and stick to it.”

“No. No f**king way.”

She turned her back to me again.

“We have to do something,” I said. “We can’t run for the rest of our lives, Bray. They’ll catch us sooner than later. The longer we run, the worse we make it for ourselves.”

She wouldn’t respond or look at me. I watched her from behind as her head fell over forward between her rigid shoulders, her arms crossed again tightly over her stomach.

“Then I’ll say it was me,” I added.

Even with her back to me I could tell her face had locked up along with the rest of her body, as her head rose solidly from between her shoulders, she slowly turned around. I had never seen her look so stunned before.

Both of her hands came out in a flash and she shoved me hard, but I didn’t fall. Then she grabbed my shoulders and shook me. “Don’t ever say that again. You f**king hear me, Elias? Don’t you ever say that!”

I just stared into her wild eyes, seemingly unfazed by her outburst. I needed to keep my cool, because one of us needed to be calm and it clearly wasn’t going to be her.

I reached up and tried to cup her face in my hands but she shoved them away.

“I can’t believe you said that!” she snapped.

“You can’t believe I said it, or that I’d actually do it?”

“It doesn’t matter. I won’t let you go down for me.”

She began to pace.

“I can’t go down for you, but you’ll let me go down with you?”

She froze. I knew my words would hurt her, but they needed to be said. Because it was exactly how I felt.

“There’s not that much of a difference, Brayelle.”

“Is that what this is about? You’re just trying to prove a point?” Resentment laced her voice.

“What point would that be?”

She shook her head with dismay. She couldn’t respond. Maybe she didn’t understand her own question, I didn’t know, but I admit even I was somewhat confused by my own. Did I just openly blame her? I thought to myself.

Not wanting her to feel that way even if it were true, I took her into my arms and kissed the top of her head.

“You’re not going to lie for me and say you were there and you’re not going to go down for me, either.”

“Then what am I doing here with you?” I asked calmly, surrendering, knowing that her resolve was unshakable.

“Maybe you shouldn’t be,” she shot back, but I knew it wasn’t something she wanted to say.

She stayed in my arms and didn’t try to pull away. I wouldn’t have let her if she did.

“Is that what you want, Elias? To leave?” She sighed and nuzzled her cheek against my chest muscle. “If you want to leave I’ll understand.” The pain was soft in her voice, but pain nonetheless. It wasn’t to make me feel guilty at all, but it did anyway.

“Well, I’m not leaving you,” I said. “But we need to figure out what we’re going to do. Partying every night and running around with Tate isn’t going to make this go away. A few more days. That’s it, Bray. We need to figure this out in a few more days, or we’re going back together and I’m going to be your witness.”

“You can’t do that.”

“If it’s the only option we have then I will do it.”

I placed my hands on her arms and took one step back, looking down into her tightened face. “Just promise me that,” I said. “If we don’t think of anything else, you’ll at least let me be your witness.”

“What if I’m lying? Would you still be my witness?”

That caught me off guard. “I know you’re not lying.”

“How do you know?”

“Because I trust you. And because I know you.”

Her gaze strayed, but it wasn’t because she was hiding anything.

“Just promise me that you’ll go along with it.”

She didn’t answer at first. I knew she didn’t want to. Finally, she nodded.

“Good,” I said and hugged her close to me again.

We stood there quietly for a moment. I had a feeling that even though she agreed, when the time came, if it ever did, there was a chance she might change her mind.

“Elias, what’s going on with Caleb and Tate?” she changed the subject. “What if this is our last stop with them? I doubt Adam will want us here after Caleb leaves. And besides, I’d feel weird about staying anyway.”

Yeah, so would I, I thought.

“I’ll talk to Tate,” I said. “Ask him to keep us around for a few more days at the most. Long enough for us to figure out our next move.”