Curvy Valentine Match

What if Will didn’t remember me? What if he did and he hated me?

What if everyone felt pity because I didn’t have a family?

“It doesn’t matter,” I told myself firmly as I navigated the dark, poorly lit roads that led to Tulip. It didn’t matter if they hated me or pitied me, I was only going to dinner because I promised Helen I would. And because I would really enjoy catching up with my old foster mom.

That was it. At least that’s what I told myself as I drove past the Tulip welcome sign and down the idyllic, tree-lined streets, decorated for Valentine’s Day. Hearts, bows and cupids were illuminated by the street lights, and every other business awning had been replaced with red, white and pink.

Typical.

I turned on the familiar street and parked at the end of the block to avoid being seen while I observed. Will and Audrey had just arrived with their respective families, and the two foster siblings remained outside chatting with friendly, affectionate smiles. They were a family, and a happy one at that.

I wasn’t sure there was a place for me here anymore, but I had to take Helen at her word. She wanted me there and that had to be enough. It is.

The sound of my cell phone ringing beside me was the perfect excuse to avoid going inside for a few more minutes. “This is Mara.”

“Hi Mara, it’s Olive. How are you?” Her chipper voice put me on edge, but Olive was nice, so I was polite.

“Good. You?”

“Exhausted, but excellent. I’m sure you know why I’m calling,” she said easily.

I shook my head. “Actually, I don’t.”

Olive’s excited squeals echoed on the other end of the call and I pulled my ear away. “We have a match for you! Isn’t that exciting?”

I shook my head even though she couldn’t see me and let out a heavy sigh. This is why I usually kept my distance from people, because the truth often sounded rude. “No, Olive. It’s not exciting. I already told Eva I wasn’t interested in finding a match.” And honestly, I was starting to feel like a broken record.

Olive gasped. “Wait, so you’re not coming in for etiquette or fashion training?”

“Nope.” I shook my head again, smiling sadly at Olive’s genuine confusion. She had an adorable baby and a man who loved her, of course she didn’t get my lack of excitement over dating. “I told Eva I wasn’t interested, but you know how she is, insistent. She pushed, so I did the questionnaire to get her to shut up.”

“But…” she stammered, “you’re not even a little bit curious about who you were matched with or what your perfect match looks like?”

“Nope. I held up my end of the bargain and I expect you ladies to do the same.”

“Of course,” she said, clearly defeated and still confused. “Can I ask why?”

“Sure. I just don’t want to date, that’s all. It’s not about finding the right one or anything like that, I’m just not interested.” I didn’t feel as if I had to justify my feelings, but Olive was a friend, and she deserved some kind of answer.

“All right, I won’t push. But if you change your mind you know how to find me.”

I laughed. “You’ll be the tired woman with the sore boobies?”

Olives barked out a laugh. “Exactly. Good night.” She ended the call and I turned my gaze back to Will and Audrey, siblings in every way despite the distinct lack of physical similarities. They had grown up together, forged that sibling bond, and they were family in every way that mattered.

I’d given up on that when I decided not to return to Tulip after leaving juvie. Hell, I’d pretty much thrown it away and I hadn’t looked back. So when Helen stepped outside and looked up and down the street, no doubt in search of me, I waited until the family went inside and started the car. I made my way back to Pilgrim.

Helen will understand.

She was a wise woman in addition to being kind, she probably knew I wouldn’t show up anyway. That didn’t mean she wouldn’t call or turn up at Bread Box again, but it meant she probably wasn’t hurt.

Hopefully.

She would be a little hurt I hadn’t kept my word, but I would call and explain. At least I would once I figured out why the hell I’d chickened out in the first place. Something else Helen probably already knew.

Pilgrim at night, was every bit as decorated and as kitschy as Tulip. There were signs of Valentine’s Day everywhere. The Pilgrim statues wore red and pink sashes, the signs adorning the town’s history were draped in red and white twinkle lights, and the street signs had been temporarily changed to a romantic theme.

I made a right onto Eternal Love Way, the name of my street until the end of the month, and let out a sigh when my tiny two bedroom home came into view. I hadn’t bothered with any repairs because it was just a rental, and I didn’t care that much as long as it was clean and safe, which I always made sure it was.