My Kind of Love (Finding Love 1)

Then, after about a half a mile, she points to a house that’s for sale. “This used to be my friend Jenny’s house. She moved her senior year. I’m surprised the house is still for sale. It has the most beautiful floor-to-ceiling fireplace.”

“The market is at a standstill. It was booming for a while and everyone was buying properties, but then people got greedy and started raising the prices. Now there are too many overpriced homes for sale and not enough buyers.”

“Makes sense,” she says. “Is that why you haven’t bought anything?”

“Yeah,” I say, leaving it at that. I’m not about to mention I’m rarely ever home, so it would be a waste of a house. Once I get back from this deployment, things are going to change. For years, I was restless, volunteering for deployments to try to find something to make me feel whole, connected, centered. But I never found it—not until Micaela, and now RJ.

“How are you feeling?” I ask, changing the subject.

“I’m okay. Still sore. The pain meds help. The doctor said it’s good to walk. I’m just not supposed to lift anything heavy, so I had my mom carry the stroller out for me.”

“For six weeks, right?” I ask, mentally calculating how long that is. I’ll be gone soon and she’ll still have four more weeks of needing help. Help I won’t be here to give her. It’s a good thing she’s living with her parents. Between them, her grandparents, her siblings, and my family, someone will always be around to help her.

“Yeah,” she says.

As we’re walking past her grandparents’ house, Liz comes barreling down the sidewalk with Cooper following after. “I knew that was you!” She pulls Micaela into a hug first and then me. “We just got in and were getting settled. We were about to head over to see the baby.”

Cooper and Liz are best friends with my parents, so I practically grew up here. They now live half the year in Florida since they’re retired, but they must’ve come back early when they heard Micaela had her baby.

“Congratulations,” Cooper says, shaking my hand and then hugging his granddaughter.

“Thank you.”

“Come inside,” Liz insists. “It’s too cold out here for the baby.”

Micaela wheels the stroller to the front door and then Liz pulls him out, carrying him inside while giving him kisses and commenting how adorable he is.

We spend a little while with them, until RJ gets cranky, and then Micaela tells them she’s going to feed him at home so she can lay him down afterward. After we say our goodbyes, we head back to Micaela’s place. Shockingly, she invites me inside. We spend the rest of the day together, watching TV and taking turns holding RJ. When dinner rolls around, Bella invites me to stay, so I do, but only after asking Micaela if it’s okay. After I’ve helped with the dishes, before Micaela can push me out the door, I leave on my own.

“Text or call if you need anything,” I say to Micaela, handing her back RJ.

I can tell she’s warring with herself, unsure if she should ask me to stay, but I’m not going to put her in that position. Whatever the reason she pushed me away, she’s still not ready to discuss it yet. Besides, going for that walk with her made me think… and now I have some things I need to take care of before I leave.

“Good night,” I murmur, my lips close to her ear.

She visibly shivers, telling me all I need to know. She still wants me… She just needs time.

Micaela

I wake up, but delay opening my eyes, already dreading the day before it even begins. December twenty-fifth. Christmas. Also known as the day I lost my husband. It’s also my son’s first Christmas, so I take a deep breath and open my eyes, determined to make it a good day. But before I can do that, I need to do something first…

It’s still dark out. Only five in the morning. When we were little, we would wake up before the sun would come up, excited to open presents, but now that everyone is older, we sleep in a little. After feeding RJ, we head out. The ride to the cemetery is short. Ian was buried locally since his entire family lives here. When I arrive, I take him out. My stroller is too big for the trunk of my car and I’m not supposed to carry the heavy car seat yet. RJ is half asleep, so I lay him out on a blanket next to me in front of Ian’s grave.

“Two years.” I stare at the headstone until the tears blur my vision. “I miss you so much.” I clutch my hand to my heart and focus on calming my breathing. I have to drive home, so I can’t get too worked up.