I grinned. “Another ringing endorsement from Jesse Hunt.”
He grinned back. “It’s still weird.”
“So you met her?”
“Once. She seems sweet. Her mom’s a whack job so we’ll see how far the apple falls from the tree, you know?”
“Yeah, look at my parents and me. I didn’t fall far.”
He groaned, tipping his head back and raking his hands through his hair. “I didn’t mean that at all. I just meant, oh to hell with it. I want you to come to my game.”
I opened my mouth, a hot argument on the tip of my tongue.
He stopped me. “You haven’t been to one game. We’ve been playing for a couple months now. You owe me.”
“You owe me the truth.”
He slouched forward again. “I told you. It’s not my secret to tell, but trust me when I say I’m trying.” He reached over and drew me to him. HIs voice softened, “Believe me, Alex. I am trying. My fucking bed is too big for me. It feels empty now. I can’t believe I’m even saying that, but whatever. That’s how I feel. I want you back. I want you to move in. I want you with me again.”
My body melted. I sagged forward, wanting the same thing, but the back of my throat was burning. It was so fucking painful to pull away from him. The tears were there again, threatening to spill as I shook my head. “I can’t. You can’t keep something
about my brother from me. I can’t come back until there are no secrets.”
He cursed under his breath.
Since I was at it, “And we define what the hell we actually are.”
“What do you mean?”
“What am I to you? Or what was I to you? A body to keep your bed warm? Fuck buddies? That’s what we were before—”
He jerked me back and bit out, “We were never that. You were never that to me.”My hand went to his chest, to push him away. It lingered instead. It curved against him and I felt his heart again.
“You were my fucking sanctuary, that’s what you were to me. You were my guilty indulgence. I should’ve stayed away from you, but I couldn’t. I still can’t. Jeezus. Look at me. I’m damn near on my knees here.”
“Jesse.”
“Stop. I don’t want to hear it. I got it. You want the secret. I’ll deliver. I have to, but when you find out—don’t be mad at me. This wasn’t my secret. This was what Ethan wanted. I was just trying to do what he wanted from me.”
The pain doubled in me. “Ethan wanted this kept from me?”
“I was left fucking instructions from his lawyers.” A threat of violence mingled with his tone. It was low and heavy. It sent shivers down my back. If Ethan had been alive...
“Will you come to the game? Please come.”
I broke. I heard myself saying in surrender, “I won’t sit with my parents. I can’t do that.”
“Fine. But they want to do dinner after the game. Your mom emailed me. She wanted me to ask you, but…” Sensing my resistance, he pulled me close again. “I want you to come for me. Be there for me. My dad’s going to be there. No doubt some whore will be with him and my sister. I can’t get through this damn dinner alone. I need you.”
“Jesse,” I murmured. My head fell to his chest. The fight was leaving me. Every second he touched me, it was becoming harder to pull away.
His hand cradled that back of my head. His thumb moved back and forth against my neck in a soothing manner. “Please, Alex. I don’t usually ask for much.”
“You don’t ask for anything.”
“Except sex.”
I felt the rumbling in his chest from laughter.
And he finished with, “I really, really enjoy screwing you.”
What every girl wants to hear.
I refused to sit with my parents or Jesse’s family so I asked Hannah and Beth to go with me instead. Our seats were across the gymnasium and higher up. The view was perfect for me to spy on Jesse’s new sister. I already knew what to expect with my parents, avoidance, and I knew Malcolm Hunt was a douchebag most of the time. I also had met a few of his girlfriends to know they were the same. Model thin, big breasts, and an aspiring actress/supermodel/singer/take your pick. A few had made sexual advances on Jesse when they were bumped off the line by his father.
Hannah put her binoculars down and sat back. “Jesse’s dad is hot. He doesn’t look like some big-time movie producer. He looks like an actor or someone who’d be in front of the camera, if you know what I mean.”
Beth grabbed for the binoculars, but she put them in her bag instead.
“Hey!” Hannah tried to grab for them again.
“No.” She moved the bag out of reach. “I can’t believe you brought these. I’m emo and I think it’s embarrassing. That says something.”
“What do you mean by that? I can’t see. This place is huge.” Hannah dove for the bag again.
Beth threw it on my lap as she held her cousin away with a hand on Hannah’s forehead. “That I usually don’t give a damn what people think about me, but that’s too much. It’s embarrassing on Alex’s behalf.”
I shrugged. “I don’t care.” I was tempted to use them myself.
“See. She doesn’t care. Only her opinion should matter.” She reached over and snatched them from my lap. No one stopped her this time.
Beth glanced over. “You really don’t care that Hannah has binoculars to scope out Jesse’s family?”
“I don’t. Really. I’d like to use them too.”
“Oh. Here.” Hannah had pulled them out and held them across Beth’s lap. “You were spot on about the girlfriend. I think she’s a Playmate. The sister looks weird. And your parents are still bitches. They won’t talk to the sister or the girlfriend.”
“The sister looks weird?” As I put the binoculars in front, I was able to follow along until I saw a girl sitting between Malcolm Hunt’s girlfriend, or I figured because of the long legs and big cleavage, and my mother. Ignoring the tension that came over me, I skipped over my parents and centered on Jesse’s father. He was striking, just like his son. He had a similar build, tall and lean with broad shoulders that tapered down to a slim waist. However, unlike his son, who had inherited his mother’s dark eyes, Malcolm had green eyes. It’d been years since I had spoken to Jesse’s father and judging from the confident authority that clung to the movie producer, I wasn’t looking forward to it. I hadn’t been surprised by Hannah’s comment. Malcolm wasn’t a womanizer just from his money. He had the looks to draw them in, but I was among the few that realized how careless he was when it came to his son or their relationship.
I backtracked to Jesse’s sister. She was petite with golden brown hair. It looked lightly curled and I could tell that it was long. Sitting down, it covered her shoulder and fell to her waist. It was then that I caught a slight movement. She had a hand wrapped around her hair. It was hidden underneath her other hand, but as her arm tensed the strand of hair tightened as well.
She was nervous. I understood.
“She looks weird.”
I lifted a shoulder. “She’s scared.”
“I don’t know what about. She’s set for life. Didn’t you say that he paid her off?”
I was regretting my one moment of confession with Hannah and Beth. Even though I still hadn’t given them any explanation of my relationship with Jesse, they weren’t stupid. They knew things had gone south so I had been interrogated why I was going to his game. So I broke and told them Jesse’s new sister would be there and I was curious. That started a whole new interrogation, which I tried to appease with a quick recant of the illegitimate daughter’s court case that never made it to court.
I hesitated about the mother, but figured they’d kept quiet about his sister. I hoped they’d keep quiet about her mother as well. “He paid off the mother, not the daughter.”
Hannah snorted, fixing the binoculars on them again. “Yeah, right. I’m sure she got a nice settlement.”
Beth punched her in the shoulder. “Stop that. He’s trying for a relationship with his daughter.”
“You don’t know that.”
“He brought her to this game.”
“Yeah, his legitimate son’s game. If he wanted a relationship, don’t you think he’d meet her in private for a while, father/daughter bonding and that crap? My bet, it’s some guilt manipulation to work on Jesse. And why are your parents here as well?”
I sighed. I gave them some explanation, but like my falling-out with Jesse, they had heard from Tiffany about my real relationship with them as well. Finally, I murmured, “I have no idea what my parents are doing here. But they like Malcolm. They went to one of