He’d been so amazing, I’d have agreed to go anywhere with him. Hell, I’d even jump out of that damned helicopter again, if I had to. Ever since he’d stopped me from getting on that plane, he’d been nothing but kind and gentle. There was that last night on the island where he got a little rough, and his dark side peeked out, but he was definitely taking things slower now.
He seemed to have changed his approach to testing my boundaries just a tiny bit at a time, instead of just pushing me right over the edge from the start.
It was working.
He’d been holding back so much and I could tell. There was something always lingering right under the surface when I was with him. A restraint. An inhibition. Something inside of him that I could feel he kept bridled, like a horse prancing at the gate.
The fact that he’d been holding back only served to keep me guessing. Instead of bracing myself for his full assault on my senses, by not giving it to me—he’d made me want it more. I kept wondering, every time we made love, if this was the time he was going to unleash that side of him.
But he’d kept himself under control, for the most part.
I was beginning to feel terrible about it, too. I didn’t want him to stifle any part of himself for me. I wanted him to feel comfortable, to be able to express any part of himself around me. Ever since we’d talked, since he’d tried to explain why he was the way he was, I really felt like I understood him more.
I’d told him I accepted him, but I wasn’t sure he let it sink in just yet.
If we were going to be married, we’d have to find some sort of compromise. Of course, with the way he was going so slow with me now, maybe I’d eventually be able to take everything he wanted to give me. I had a growing suspicion that I’d only seen the tip of his fiery iceberg, so to speak.
My phone rang, pulling me out of my dreams of Bear. I picked it up on the first ring when I saw that it was Marie.
We had a lot to catch up on, since I hadn’t talked to her either. I’d sent her a quick text to let her know I’d changed my mind about coming back home and not talked to her since. She didn’t even know about Harlan and his crazy shenanigans.
“He did what!” she shrieked into my ear as I told her about it now.
“You should have seen Bear! He diffused the situation like he was dealing with a toddler or something. He was amazing. Harlan ate right out of his hands.”
“Well, I can’t wait to meet him,” she said.
“Meet him? Well, I’m sure you will eventually.”
“How about next week?” she asked.
“Next week?” I asked, my voice rising in surprise.
“I’m bored, Chloe! Can I come stay with you? I’ve always wanted to spend New Year’s Eve in the Big Apple. Unless you have other plans…” Her voice faded away and I could see her pout in my head.
“Of course you can stay with me, you dork,” I said. “I can’t wait for you to meet Bear. You’ll fall in love with him.”
“Awesome!” she said. “I already booked my flight. I’ll be there the morning of New Year’s Eve.”
I couldn’t help but laugh.
“Of course you did,” I said. “Max and I will pick you up at the airport.”
“Who’s Max?”
“My driver,” I replied.
“You have a fucking driver now?”
“Well, technically, he’s one of Bear’s drivers, but yeah…” I hadn’t told her about the engagement yet. I contemplated telling her now, but decided I’d rather see her face when I did, so I kept my mouth shut.
“Unbelievable,” she replied.
“Trust me,” I said. “You’ll be thankful for having a driver. It’s better than walking everywhere and taking the subway.”
“You sound like you’re getting soft, Chloe,” she teased.
“Oh, shut up,” I said. “Actually, I feel like I’m toughening up a bit.” A hard smack sounded in my head and my body responded to it immediately. I’d been dying for another spanking since we’d come back to the city, and Bear hadn’t laid a hand on me. My flesh was itching for that deliciously forbidden burning pain.
“Must be the cold,” she said.
“Yeah, must be,” I replied. “Speaking of cold, make sure you bring warm clothes.”
“Okay, mom,” she teased.
“Ugh, shut up,” I said. “Text me your flight info. I’ll see you next week.”
“Alright, alright,” she said, hanging up.
I looked around the apartment, at the fabric and needles and dress forms that had spilled out of the studio into the rest of the rooms and nodded.
“I’m going to need a much bigger place,” I decided, standing up. I poured myself a glass of wine and began tidying up before Bear arrived for our date, my head spinning as I thought of all the things I wanted to show Marie while she was here.
I wondered briefly what she would think of Bear, but everyone seemed to love him so far. He was charming and kind and generous. I’m sure he would be the same with Marie.
Still, a small thread of nervousness began slithering through me.
Once I told Marie and Matilda about the engagement, then that meant it was real. Somehow, keeping it under a shroud of secrecy had made it feel like a dream.
I reached up, touching the choker around my neck to remind myself that it wasn’t a dream at all.
It was a fairytale come true.
Chapter 8
I burst out laughing
when I saw Bear standing at my door.
“You look like a candy cane threw up on you!” I said. He had, indeed, bought us matching hats, scarves and gloves. Red and white striped ones, that is. “Or, perhaps, the Cat in the Hat.”
“It’s Christmas, where’s your spirit?”
“I have Christmas spirit,” I said. “I just didn’t realize you had so much of it yourself!”
“Well, now you know. It’s one of my favorite times of the year.”
“Now I know,” I laughed.
“Max is waiting outside, are you ready to go?”
“Sure am,” I said, pulling on my coat.
“Not yet, you aren’t,” he said, pulling me close and kissing me quickly, before pulling the hat over my head and throwing the scarf around my neck. I held my hands up and he slid the gloves on. I felt like a little kid and if it wasn’t for the excitement in his eyes, I might have been embarrassed.
Instead, I found my own excitement growing.
“You look great!” he exclaimed.
“So do you,” I said, beaming at him.
When I saw Max standing at the car wearing the exact same hat, scarf and gloves, I burst out laughing.
“You’re a nut!” I said to Bear.
“Hey I’m just spreading Christmas cheer!”
“If you say so,” I laughed.
“Hey, Max,” I said, sliding into the car.
“Hello, Miss Chloe! Merry Christmas!”
“You too, Max,” I said. Bear slid in beside me and we pulled away from the curb. He threw his arm around me, holding me close as we drove down the street.
“You look beautiful, Chloe,” he said, kissing my nose.
“You’re adorable,” I said. “I had no idea you were such a fan of holidays.”
“I told you we needed to get back for Christmas, didn’t I?”
“Indeed you did,” I said.
“You’ll love Rockefeller Center. It’s beautiful. The tree’s right in the middle of the rink and everyone’s so happy and smiling.”