I was so lost in my happiness that I had forgotten the painful truth I’d been hiding from Alessio and everyone else.
I was still the enemy’s daughter. Alberto’s fiancée. I was an Abandonato.
Shaking my head at my own stupidity, I leaned against the sink as a new wave of tears assaulted me. I was in too deep and now it was impossible to go back now
Even if I tried to forget what I had with Alessio…I couldn’t forget. The memories were etched deep inside my heart and soul.
His touches. His gentle caresses. His soft and then possessive kisses. His sweet words. His enthralling bluish-steel eyes. Our moments together…I couldn’t forget.
Because I felt it. Every day. Every minute. Every second. I felt it deep inside my soul.
The tears ran down my cheeks and I brought a hand up to my mouth, covering the sob that threatened to come out.
Instead of escaping, I ended up trapping myself.
I cried for the gruesome memories that continued to assault my mind. And then I cried for the dreams and the future that I desperately wanted to hold on…but they seemed impossible.
After my tears had dried out, I stood up and washed my face again. I quickly braided my hair into a French braid and then stepped out into the bathroom.
But my steps faltered and I froze at the sight of Alessio pacing my room.
He must have heard me because he quickly swiveled around toward me, his shoulders dropping in relief. “You were taking so long. I got worried,” he said. He took a step toward me but stopped when I moved back. “Ayla?” His brow furrowed. “Don’t do this, Ayla.”
“Please go,” I whispered brokenly.
He shook his head and took a step toward me again. “I’m not going anywhere.”
“Alessio, leave. Please. I don’t want you here.”
“No.”
Growing frustrated at his stubbornness, my head snapped up and I stared into his eyes. “Why won’t you leave me alone?” I screamed.
“I’m not leaving you alone like this. I didn’t leave you last night and I’m not leaving you now.”
“Alessio…please…don’t do this. I can’t do this now.”
Instead of caving in to my begging, he walked forward, stopping right in front of me. Alessio wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his chest. “I’m not letting you go.”
My hands instinctively came up and I grasped his shirt tightly. “Why do you keep doing this?” I sobbed.
“Because I can’t have you go back into that dark place. I need you here with me,” he replied gently. He bent down, wrapping an arm around my waist and then behind my legs before pulling me up, cradling me into his chest.
I placed my head on his shoulder as he carried me to my bed. Alessio sat down, keeping me into his warm and protective embrace as he settled me sideways on his lap.
“Ayla, talk to me,” he said after a few minutes of silence. When I didn’t answer, he sighed, his arm tightening around me. “Please.”
“What do you want me to say, Alessio?” I whispered tiredly, keeping my face buried in his neck.
“Anything. Just talk to me. Don’t shut me out.”
“What do you want to know? You already know the truth, but if you want me to say it, I’ll say it. I was raped, Alessio. There. I was raped,” I said bitterly, harshly pulling away. I struggled, but his hold was tight.
He cupped my cheeks in the palms of his hands, tilting my head up to face him. “Ayla, do you know how strong you are? You are the strongest woman I have ever met. Your strength shines brighter than anyone else.”
“Alessio…” Never in a million years would I have thought that Alessio Ivanshov would utter such words to me. He gave me hope.
“I don’t know exactly what happened, and I’m not going to push you for more. You can tell me when you are ready. I will wait,” he said. “But please don’t shut me out. Don’t run away from me.”
We were both silent for a few seconds. He placed a kiss on my forehead, letting his lips linger there. “I didn’t expect you to say anything, but now that you have said it, please tell me who the fuck hurt you, so I can kill the motherfucker.”
I stared into his eyes.
They glinted with fury and such ferocious intensity that it took my breath away. I also saw the hurt and pain there.
But what surprised me most was that I didn’t see disgust. He didn’t look at me as if he hated me.
Remembering his question, I shook my head. His eyes lost the light there and he sighed. I couldn’t tell him.
I didn’t want this dream to end now. I wanted to continue living in this world.
“Ayla—”
“Please don’t ask me about him. I don’t want to talk about him. Please, Alessio.”