Their solution was simple: Ruby must go. The good name of Euronia must be protected and if the Prince Regent wanted to date then it must be handled by the press team.
He hated this. He hated all of this. For the first time in his life he wished he was free of all this. Free of the responsibility. Free of the ties. He wanted to be free to love the woman he’d loved for the last ten years. He wanted to be free to tell the world that. He didn’t need to ask their permission.
‘Ruby, talk to me. Tell me what you’re thinking. Whatever it is you’re worried about—we can fix it. We can make this work. You and I can be together. I love you, Ruby. I’m not going to lose you twice.’
She sucked in a deep breath. It was the first time he’d told her how he really felt about her. But this wasn’t the way he’d wanted to do that. Telling someone you loved them should be for sunsets and fireworks—not bright libraries, with three other people listening to every word.
Ruby pushed herself up from the chair and walked over to the window, looking out over the gardens. It was almost as if she hadn’t heard his words.
‘I need to go, Alex. I need to get away from all this. I can’t think straight.’ She reached out and touched one of the ornate curtains at the window. ‘I need to get away from here. This isn’t my place. This isn’t my home.’ She spun around to face him. ‘I need to get away from you, Alex.’
It was like a wave of cold water washing over him. She hadn’t reacted to his words. She hadn’t even acknowledged that he’d said he loved her.
Doubts flooded through him. Maybe he’d been wrong all along. Maybe she didn’t feel the same way as he did. Maybe this was her way of letting him down gently.
He felt his professional face fall into place—his Prince Regent face—the one he’d never had to use around Ruby.
‘Where will you go?’ He couldn’t help it, his words were stumbling.
This time her eyes seemed more focused. ‘I’d always planned on visiting my mum and dad at Christmas. I’ll go now. They’re in France. I can get there in a few hours.’
Her shoulders straightened. He watched her suck in another deep breath and look his advisors square in the eyes. She was determined. It was almost as if now she’d made a decision nothing would get in her way. She started to walk forward.
He tried to be rational. He tried to think logically. ‘I’ll arrange for the jet to take you.’
She gave him the briefest nod and walked straight out of the door. Not a single hesitation or backward glance.
His advisors all started talking at once. But Alex couldn’t hear them. All he could focus on was the stillness of Ruby’s skirts as she walked along the corridor. The spark and joy he’d felt around her last night had vanished. Even the sway in her steps had been curtailed.
His Princess Ruby was vanishing before his eyes.
* * *
She couldn’t breathe. An elephant was currently sitting on her chest, squeezing every single breath from her lungs.
Her legs burned as she climbed the stairs and strode along the corridor to her room.
Alex had told her that he loved her.
Alex had told her that he loved her.
Her heart should be singing. Instead it felt as if it had been broken in two.
All those conversations. All those questions about whether she was sure, whether she was ready.
The cold, hard truth was that she wasn’t. Right now she doubted she ever would be. Waking up to see people she didn’t know telling lies about her, people the world over reading and believing those lies, was like being dunked in an icy-cold bath.
Was this what her life would become?
She opened the cupboard and pulled out her suitcase, leaving it open on the bed. She started yanking clothes from their hangers, not bothering to fold anything.
Then she stopped, her fingers coming into contact with some of the more delicate fabrics. Some of the more beautiful designs.
Were these clothes even hers?
Should she even take them?
Confused, she walked into the bathroom and emptied the area around the sink with one sweep of her hand into her toiletries bag.
There was a movement to the side of her eye. She sighed. Alex. She needed some space.
Except it wasn’t Alex. It was Annabelle, her eyes wide as she looked at the disarray in the room.
Ruby was shocked. She dropped to her knees and put her hands on Annabelle’s shoulders. The little girl’s bottom lip was trembling.
‘Oh, honey,’ she said. ‘I’m sorry. But I need to go away for a little while. I need to leave.’
Annabelle shook her head. Her mouth opened and she scowled fiercely.
‘No.’
It was one word. It was a tiny word—fuelled by emotion. But it was the biggest step in the world.
She flung her arms around the little girl. She hadn’t thought it was possible for her heart to break any more. But she hadn’t counted on this.
She cradled the blonde curls in her fingers and whispered in Annabelle’s ear. ‘I love you, honey. And I’m so proud of you for saying that word. You are such a clever little girl.’ She pulled back and held Annabelle’s face in her hands. ‘That’s the best word I’ve ever heard.’
‘No.’
Annabelle said it again, and pointed to the case. There was another movement to the side. This time it was Alex. His face was pale.
‘Ruby?’
She nodded. ‘Yes. She spoke to me.’
She kissed Annabelle on the forehead, then lifted her and handed her to Alex as she continued to pack her case.
Alex was the parent here—not her. It was his job to be by his daughter’s side. She doubted she could ever fulfil her professional role again. Loving both Alex and Annabelle had wrecked her perspective. Becoming emotio
nally attached would make leaving harder for them all. She had to draw a line in the sand.
Alex’s face was racked with confusion. ‘And you’re still going to go?’
She nodded. She had to.
Everything was too much right now. She didn’t just love Alex. She loved his little girl too. If she didn’t leave now she didn’t know how her heart could ever recover.
She jammed the last thing into the case and closed it. Picking it up, she turned to face him.
He was clutching his daughter and shaking his head. ‘How can you? How can you go now?’
‘Because I have to. Because this is the right thing to do.’ She stepped up close to him. ‘Because if I stay this will only get worse. You think I didn’t see the panic on your advisors’ faces? You think I don’t know that every single action you take could affect the people in this country—your trade agreements, your business? I’m not so stupid as to want to destroy the country that you’ve built. I’m not that stupid and I’m not that selfish.’
‘But what about us?’ He glanced down towards Annabelle, who had cuddled into his chest. ‘How can you leave us now?’ He was getting angry. He was getting frustrated. ‘Don’t you have a heart?’
She flinched. But it was exactly what she’d needed to hear. It made it so much easier.
‘I left my heart in Paris ten years ago, Alex. You should know.’
And she held up her head and walked out of the room before her shaking legs could stop her.
CHAPTER TWELVE
IT WAS STRANGE, spending Christmas in France. The weather was unseasonably warm. Ruby was used to Christmases in England, with freezing temperatures and snow.
Her mother appeared at the door. She had a pale cream envelope in her hand. ‘This came for you. I had to sign for it.’ She turned it over and over in her hands.
Ruby sighed. ‘Is it from Alex?’
She stared at her desk. It was already littered with A4 envelopes—some from Alex, and some from his advisors. All full of details on how to deal with ‘the situation’. Pages and pages of plans for dealing with the press.