We laughed. “Me, too. Plus my word vomit is atrocious.”
“Word vomit? I don’t understand what that means.” She looked at me with a raised eyebrow. Even though Francesca spoke fluent English, sometimes she wasn’t able to follow slang.
I took another bite. “It’s like my filter to my mouth has gone. This morning in the doctor’s office, I was thinking about how built Gabe was. More so than before he was deployed. I told him he was big and that I liked him big.”
Francesca sputtered and laughed. “You did not.”
“I so did. Then I continued the nightmare by telling the doctor I was not currently having sex with Gabe standing right there like I was a virgin.”
Francesca dropped her spoon as she held her stomach and laughed. “I’m so glad I did not get word vomit. I’m becoming a carnivore. Red meat is all I can think about.”
We put our spoons back in the ice cream. “Here’s to pregnancy.”
“Morning.” I shuffled into the kitchen where Gabe stood at the stove, cooking. His low-slung lounge pants, messy hair, and T-shirt were not helping my thoughts stay on the straight and narrow.
I will keep my mouth shut. I will keep my mouth shut.
With expert skill, he flipped an omelet.
I am so screwed.
“Morning. How’d you sleep?” His deep voice was sexy as hell. Always had been.
“Really well.” I motioned to the couch where blankets were strewn to the side. “You know you can sleep in the room Nonno was in. You would get a better night’s rest.”
He sprinkled some cheese on the omelet before sliding it on a plate and pouring more egg batter into the pan. “I slept perfect, knowing you were okay. Unless it bothers you, I would prefer the couch.”
Last night I had debated whether to call Gabe on my phone from my bedroom to hear him talk. When he had been Tack, there were many nights I wasn’t able to sleep. To help, he read to me, which chased away all the nightmares.
“No, it’s fine.” He glanced over his shoulder and there was no missing his quick appreciative glance at my body.
I was wearing silk shorts with a camisole. The appreciation brought delight to me.
Gabe added some peppers to the pan as I came to stand beside him.
“I feel bad you’re cooking all the time. I need to set my alarm to get up one morning and cook that bacon quiche you love.”
He pressed a quick kiss to my cheek. “I like cooking breakfast for you. Grab your omelet before it gets cold. Mine will be done in a second.”
As soon as I grabbed the plate, the smell of eggs hit me out of nowhere. It was raunchy and I gagged. Normally, I loved eggs, but this was foul and rank. It got worse as I tried to breathe through it. My stomach turned. This wasn’t going to end well. I knew what was coming as I dashed to the bathroom. The stench followed me as if it had permanently soaked into my skin.
My cracker I’d eaten was lost as I heaved into the toilet.
Morning sickness. I hated it. More heaving. It was as if I had food poisoning from the smell alone.
Gabe kneeled beside me with a warm cloth as I flushed the toilet. There was a dull ache in my stomach after retching.
“What triggered it this time?”
I wiped my face and muttered, “Eggs.”
“No more eggs. Check.”
A small giggle escaped. “That’s probably wise to start a checklist.” I stood and tossed the cloth into the hamper. “I’m going to stay in here until we leave for the hospital. I don’t think I can stand smelling it again.”
I gagged thinking about it and closed my eyes tight. Think about something else.
“How about some crackers and ginger ale?”
My stomach was raw, but I needed to eat something. The thought of either wasn’t causing any additional nausea. “Yeah, I’ll try it.”
Gabe took off and I shut the door behind him to keep the smell out. I sniffed my clothes and swore there was a faint egg aroma.
I’m going to be sick. Oh my gosh!
It was like I had some sort of super sniffer. I gagged again. Hurriedly, I stripped off my pajamas and threw them into the hamper like they were toxic.
“Here you go. A plate of crackers and—”
I spun around. Naked. I felt the heat creep over my skin.
Gabe took me in, swallowed hard, and tried to look at my face, but his eyes kept drifting down. My arms instinctively covered my breasts.
His face remained blank. “Willow… we… I… the doctor said no sex right now.”
Kill. Me. Now. Apparently my body was taking over since I had put my mouth on lockdown.
This had to be explained. “I… uhh… I was changing. I smelled eggs on my clothes and stripped. I wasn’t asking for sex. No sex!” My sentence ended on a near squeal. My word vomit wasn’t over yet. Of course not. “I don’t mean no sex ever. I love sex with you.” My hands flew to my mouth. “Why can’t I stop?” I muttered. Pregnancy was stripping every ounce of dignity I had left as my hormones took over.
Gabe set the plate and drink down.
Would I still be sexy even pregnant?
Reemerging, Gabe held a white terry cloth robe out and helped me put it on. “For my sanity, let’s get you covered.”
Tears pricked my eyes. His sanity? Was I that horrid looking already? What was wrong with me? Word vomit, tears, horniness… all in the last two minutes.
Averting my eyes, I tightened the sash on my robe. “Thank you. I wasn’t thinking when I tried to get away from the egg smell and stripped down.”
A finger came underneath my chin raising my gaze. “You have nothing to be ashamed of. Hell, Willow, I want you so bad. If I thought I could control myself, I’d want you naked all the time. But we can’t. The doctor said not for a week. And I don’t think we’re ready for that step. But, I want nothing more than to make love to you while you are pregnant with my children. Every. Single. Day.”
“You don’t think I’m hideous?” A tear slipped free and then the dam burst and I cried. I wasn’t showing, but I felt off.
Gabe wrapped his arms around me.
“I’m a mess. I’ve never been this emotional.”
“You’re pregnant, sweetheart. It’s messing with your hormones.” I felt his lips press against the top of my head. “You’re perfect. All I ever want is you. I love you.”
“Love you, too.”
I wrapped my arms around his waist, loving the muscular feel. Oh, how I’d missed Gabe all these months. He caressed my back and the soothing motion calmed me.
“I’m trying to keep my distance physically from you.”
“Why?” I knew the answer was obvious, but I needed to hear his thoughts.
The depth of his stare penetrated my soul. “Because, I need to know you want to be with me and not because of the chemistry.”
My heart clenched at the pain in his words. This was the effects of his childhood. Plus, I had been all over the place emotionally and giving mixed signals. I wanted him, then I was scared or aggravated. Mentally, I told myself I needed to decide fully. Right now, I had only one foot on the path and one foot off, which wasn’t fair to any of us including our unborn children.
I squeezed him tighter. “We’re both holding back.”
“We’ll get there.”
And I knew we would.
Guiding me to the bed, Gabe placed the crackers and ginger ale before me. Thankfully, there was no smell associated with either.
“Here, eat some of this.”
Mercifully, I took a small bit of the cracker. “Thanks. I may dub this the breakfast of champions.”
He chuckled. “If it keeps you from getting sick, it’ll earn that title. Hopefully, this subsides after the first trimester.?
? How much had Gabe read on pregnancy? I’d read quite a bit since I found out. From Gabe’s comments, he had been reading as much as I had.
“After we stop to see Carson, I was wondering if we could run home. Just for a bit, not to stay the night.”
Gabe touched my leg, and I felt the familiar warmth that was like a drug. His fingers retracted and I stilled his hand.
“Please don’t. I want your touch.” I wanted to put both feet on the path. Yes, it was terrifying, but all the same, love was worth the risk.
The heat from his hand returned. “Trent stopped by. Marie and Bennett want us there to meet with the doctors this morning regarding Carson.”
The cracker dropped on my plate. “Wait. Why? Is there something wrong?”
“Not that I know of. Don’t stress. If Dr. Byrum sees you, he may bring you back to the hospital.”
I took a deep breath, picked up my cracker, and took a small bite. “Do you think it’s an update?”
“It could be. I suspect they’re going to update the options.”
Options. There was only one option I wanted, which was to bring Carson back. What other options were there? Take him off life support before he was ready? Absolutely not. Thank goodness Bennett and Marie were levelheaded, and I wouldn’t have to worry about them doing something radical.
A few days ago, the doctors indicated Carson wasn’t strong enough to breathe on his own yet. Had something changed? Was it for the worse? Better? I hated vague meetings with doctors. It was much better to get right to the point.
Gabe’s fingers on my cheek brought me out of my spiraling thoughts. “Let’s wait to worry until we hear from the doctors. All we can do is focus on the facts.”
He was right.
“How’s Francesca?” I asked, worried about her. Now, I was even more grateful we had spent time together last night. We had laughed and left all of the worries from our lives behind. Time had flown until eleven when we simultaneously yawned. Two pregnant women staying up that late was a miracle with how much sleep we now required. It had been worth it.
“They aren’t mentioning this to her until we get there due to the stress. Bennett and Marie are worried.”