"It spells disaster," she answers me back softly and in a completely nonargumentative way. I know she does this because Ben is in the backseat and she doesn't want him to understand what we're talking about.
"She's a sweet girl," Delaney says carefully. "And you're...um...probably not the best person for a sweet girl right now."
"I understand that," I tell her candidly.
"You have to think about..." she says, and
then points over her shoulder to the backseat. "He's crazy for her. Don't ruin that."
"I've got it handled, Delaney," I say in exasperation.
"Do you?" she asks, her voice starting to sound a little hysterical. "Do you really, Zack?"
I turn to give her a quick glance. Her eyes are filled with worry. "I won't hurt her," I tell her with soft reassurance, even though this might be a lie. "She and I have an understanding."
Delaney takes a deep breath and lets it out. "I don't want her hurt, and I don't want you-know-who hurt," she says as she points again to the backseat. "But I don't want you hurt either."
My head snaps back over to her. "Me? Why would I get hurt?"
"Because I don't care what you think is going on, I can tell you have feelings for her," she whispers urgently.
Yeah...I do. Have feelings for Kate. I've admitted that to myself.
But that doesn't matter. The feelings I have aren't enough for her, and she deserves better than what I can give her. So until such time as she expects more, and as long as she is okay with the tiny bit I can give her, I'm not going to worry about it.
Self-centered prick that I am.
She's silent for a moment and then she raises a hand to squeeze my shoulder. "You are a beautiful man, Zack, inside and out, and I know one day you are going to find someone that makes you very happy."
I can't help the snort that comes out of me as I immediately dismiss that idea.
"It's true...you will," she asserts, completely ignoring my skepticism. "You have so much to give and share with someone."
A wry smile comes to my face even as sadness creeps into my heart. "I love you, Delaney. Think you're pretty brilliant too. But I'm here to tell you, Sis...you're wrong. Anything special I had to give to a woman died in the car that night, right alongside Gina."
Chapter 26
Kate
Zack sure knows how to send a text.
Get naked and be in my bed waiting. Be there in twenty.
Tingles of anticipatory pleasure skitter up my spine and I give a squeak of excitement as I practically skip my way into his bedroom.
Yes, I've been invited into the inner sanctuary this past week and a half that Ben has been gone. Zack had never once taken me into his room at the other house, but the minute he walked into the house after dropping off Ben and Delaney at the airport, he simply picked me up, threw me over his shoulder, and walked into the master suite. He tossed me on the bed, followed me down, and didn't let me out of it for several hours.
Since then, I feel like I've been in a cocoon with Zack. The playoffs started last week and the first best-of-seven game round was against the Atlanta Sting, the number-eight seed in the conference. Zack had practices and team meetings and the first two games of the series were at home because the top seed gets home ice advantage. The Cold Fury won those games handily, as was expected, and Zack was in a very good mood following those two wins.
We almost broke his bed after each of those games.
It's a long-standing tradition in the league that the players don't shave during the playoffs. Zack hasn't taken a razor to his face since the last regular season game and it's filling in nicely.
It feels fabulous between my legs and I feel wanton and sinful even thinking that as I walk back toward his bedroom and start taking my clothes off. I can't believe what a hussy I've become sometimes, but damn...Zack and his attentions have awakened a part of me that I didn't know existed. He's made me feel like a woman.
I wonder what kind of mood he'll be in when he gets here. While the Cold Fury won the third game on the road in Atlanta, taking a 3-0 lead in the series, they lost tonight's game badly.
And I mean really badly.
I watched with my heart in my throat from the comfort of Zack's couch, wincing every time the other team scored and every time we failed to score.
The Cold Fury lost 5-0, and it was an old-fashioned ass-whuppin' that was handed down by a low-ranked team. So Zack may be in a foul mood. Judging from his text, whatever the mood may be, it's not diminished his desire for me. By ordering me into bed, it's clear what he wants to do tonight.
Same thing we've done over and over again, repetitively, sometimes without rest or food; the only time we took a long break was when he was on the road the few days he's been in Atlanta for the last two games. Which was just enough time for the red scrapes on the insides of my thighs from his beard to heal up.
It's late. The team plane flew back to Raleigh right after the game and it will be close to two A.M. by the time he pulls into the garage. I'm not tired in the slightest.
On the contrary, I feel wired, restless, and needy.
I'm ready for Zack to get home and ease my worries. I need him to show me that what we've built up over the last several days with each other is not just my imagination.
Because not only have Zack and I been having wild monkey sex practically everywhere in his house, we've also been talking. He's opened up to me some more about Gina and what happened in the accident. Here in the privacy of his home and within the bounds of our tentative relationship, I think he finds relief in the fact that I don't judge his guilt, but I don't condone it either. I've also learned more stuff about Zack. He's told me about growing up in Nova Scotia, how he started playing hockey when he was just four years old, and he even told me about how he and Gina had been high school sweethearts.
I was surprised to learn that they had broken up for a few years when he first entered the league. He told me that was his decision, and that he didn't want any ties back home. It was sort of his way to sow his oats while embarking on a new and exciting career. He did get back together with Gina a few years later, and they were together ever since.
He doesn't ever mention why they never got married, and I don't press the issue. Because when Zack does talk to me about these things, he does so hesitantly and without a lot of detail. The few times I tried to poke and prod for more information, he shut down on me. Thus, I've learned to accept what he's willing to tell me and leave it at that.
So he's not sharing all of his dark secrets with me, but we have forged a definite bond because of all the personal and intimate time we are spending together while Ben is away. I'm anxious to see if this will hold, or if his walls will be put back up when Ben gets home tomorrow. I'm hopeful, but I suspect he'll withdraw from me again.
I'm anxious to see Ben. I hadn't realized just how much I've grown attached to him over the last several weeks. I wasn't exaggerating when I told Zack that I loved his son. That is a true and hard-core fact. And while I may not have the freedom once the little rug rat gets home to be with Zack the way I have been over the past several days, I'd still much rather have him here than gone.
I quickly take off the remainder of my clothes and pull back the comforter on Zack's bed. I haven't slept in here while he was away in Atlanta, thinking it to be a little creepy stalkerlike to do so. Instead I slept in my room while he was gone and merely fantasized about what would happen when he got back.
I crawl into bed and wait for Zack to arrive. Looking around his room with interest, I take in the glaring differences from the room he shared with Gina. The walls in here are a dark brown and accentuated by a taupe-and-cream geometric comforter that he bought a few days ago when he was out running some errands. There's no art on the walls, and I suspect there never will be. I think Zack became comfortable with this room the minute he got rid of the white lacy spread that had graced his bed in the old house.
Exactly fourteen minutes after I crawled into his bed, Zack walks in. He must have been speeding to get here from the airport. I have the lamp on and it throws a warm glow across the room. He looks tired as he walks in, wearing a black suit with a white dress shirt underneath, the top two buttons undone. His beard is starting to thicken and I can hear the scratch of his fingers against it as he rubs them along his jaw.
"Tired?" I ask softly from my perch in his bed.
"Yeah," he says as he walks into the master bath.
I turn on my side and watch him as he gets undressed, carelessly throwing his clothes on the floor. I'll be picking those up later. He walks out of the bathroom, turns off the light behind him, and comes toward me, gloriously naked and unabashed to be so.
When he reaches the bed, he looks down at me and asks, "Got any clothes on under there?"
"See for yourself."
Zack's tired eyes flash hot and the corners of his mouth lift up in a half smile. "Are you challenging me?"
I bring my hand up to cover my mouth and gasp in mock astonishment. "I'd never do such a thing."
Zack doesn't respond, but merely takes a hold of the blanket that is covering me and peels it back. His eyes roam over my body, back and forth, as he takes his time with just the visual for now.
"Missed that body," he murmurs.
My heart purrs like a kitten from the effects of his sweet words and I start to fidget under his bold perusal.
A quick flick of my eyes to the right, and I see Zack's erection standing out stiffly from his body. So damn beautiful. Long, thick...very hard. Very ready.
"What are you waiting for?" I whisper to him, and his eyes drag up my body until they connect with mine.
He smiles at me deviously for just a moment before turning toward the nightstand beside him. He opens it, grabs a condom out from his stash, and says, "It's our last night where we can be as noisy as we want. Trying to figure out what's going to make you scream the loudest."
My eyes flutter closed and a soft moan floats out of my mouth. I hear Zack open the condom and I imagine what he must look like right now as he rolls it on, but I open my eyes only when I feel Zack's hand curve behind my neck and his mouth closing over mine. He kisses me hard and with swift surety, his tongue rolling over mine with possession. It's one of the reasons why my heart is all tangled up...because of the way Zack kisses. Like I'm the only woman he's ever kissed, even though I know that's not true.
He lifts his lips from mine and pulls me up out of bed by his grip on the back of my neck. He pulls me right onto my feet in front of him and wraps an arm around my back to drag me in to his body. He kisses me again. Long and deep, his hard length pressed between our bodies and pulsing with excitement.
"Missed this so much," Zack mutters against my lips, and his admission causes me to shiver in delight. He's a man of few words, so when he does say something like that, it affects me deeply.