“You’re such a fucking pain in the ass, Blake,” he spat irritably as he got up to get his blankets and laid back down on the floor.
“I just think you’d be more comfortable on a mattress,” I said quietly.
“Yeah—maybe I would be—but maybe I’d rather be closer to you,” he replied grumpily.
I was thankful the room was dark and he couldn’t see my shocked smile from where he was laying. I’d never tell him, but Cole made me feel safe.
Justin didn’t go back to school the following week. Because of his broken arm, he was replaced by Cole as starting quarterback. I inwardly smiled at all of this thinking that my friend karma was a real bitch, and she got Justin good.
The guys made me swear that I would tell them if Justin ever spoke to me again. He did speak to me again—he apologized for what he almost did to me. I couldn’t even look him in the eyes as he spoke. For a while, the only male eyes I looked into were Greg’s, Aubry’s, and Cole’s. I trusted them. I loved them. And that scared me more than almost getting raped ever could.
Chapter 7
Present
Aubry skipped out on his date and comforted me with ice cream. He watched Home Alone with me before he made me watch the Cubs game. He insisted on sleeping on the floor next to my bed. When I woke up, I called Russell and asked him to come over. The first thing I need to do is break up with him. I hate doing this but knowing that I’ve been watched my entire life—and that those around me could be in potential danger—freaks me out. I know that I’m stuck with Cole, Becky, Greg, and Aubry, so I don’t even try to isolate myself from them. Russell has nothing to do with this, though. Besides, as nice as he is, our relationship is going nowhere fast. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about-
“Hey, beautiful,” Russell says interrupting my thoughts before giving me a sweet kiss on the lips.
“Hey, Russ, do you want some tea?”
I hate tea, but Russell loves it, so I bought a kettle shortly after we started dating.
“Sure. How are you feeling today?” he asks as he runs the back of his hand down my face softly.
“Fine, I guess,” I reply with a shrug.
We sit on the barstools around my kitchen island, and I can feel his eyes on me as he sips his tea. I’m chipping my nail polish, trying to figure out how to start this conversation. My previous breakups were easy. Boyfriends start getting possessive or too opinionated, and I cut them off. Russell is sweet though. He’s laid back, he’s honest, and he’s nice. Too nice for me.
I take a deep breath and turn in my seat to face him. “Russ, I think we should take a break.”
He sets his mug down and blinks at me rapidly. “What are you talking about? A break between us? Aren’t you happy?”
The mix of confusion and hurt in his voice makes me cringe. I should’ve never gotten involved with this one—he’s too...nice.
I smile sadly. “I am Russell. It’s not you—”
“Oh, don’t give me that rubbish,” he snaps. “It’s not you; it’s me. I don’t want that. Tell me what’s going on.”
I bite down on my lip to keep from smiling because angry Russell is kind of hot and very funny. “Really, Russ. I know it sounds cliché, but it’s not you. It is me. I need to be alone right now. I’m lost, and I need time to myself.”
He takes a deep breath and stands in front of me. He holds both of my hands in his and presses them to his lips while he looks at me intently with his hazel eyes. “I can help you find yourself. Let me help you, babe. I can make you happy.”
I close my eyes because I can’t stand to see the hope in his. “Russell—”
He takes my mouth with a possession he’s never used before. He explores my mouth with his tongue as if he’s searching for the part of me he thinks he has lost. He doesn’t realize he never had it to begin with. When he breaks the kiss, he looks at me again. His eyes are desperate.
“Take a week. We’ll take a short break. I’ll call you next week, and we’ll talk about this again.”
“Russell, I can’t. There’s no point,” I say slowly.
“Please, Blake,” he says as he walks to the door. “Just think about it.”
“Russell—” I say, but he walks out before I can finish my sentence.
That did not just happen.
I take a minute to process what just went down before calling Becky.
“Oh my God, and he just left? Just like that?” she asks amused.
“Yeah, crazy right?” I say with a nervous laugh.