“Why would I feel different?”
“Because you’re married.”
I roll my eyes. “It doesn’t count. Nothing is different.”
It is, though. I don’t know how to explain it. Suddenly, I feel a bond with Jude. Like some invisible thread has stitched us together.
“This is different,” she says. “I can finally come over to your house to hang out with you.”
“True. I’m happy about that.”
“Me too. Who woulda thought you’d be living in a nice house, married to a hot guy? This is your year. I think all the good things are finally happening to you.”
I hope she’s right.
“Jude and I are roommates, Meg. Stop saying married. And don’t tell anyone at school. Not even Erik.”
“I promised you I wouldn’t. Don’t worry.”
I want to believe her, but Megan likes to talk, and I’m afraid she’s going to slip up and tell someone, or everyone, about my situation. Those snotty bitches will never shut up about it if they find out.
“How are things going with Erik?” I ask.
It’s cute how mentioning his name puts a big smile on her face.
“He’s so sweet, Sky. I swear, I can’t get enough of him. I almost didn’t come over today because I wanted to hang out with him.”
“Gee, thanks,” I say, lining up the nail polish bottles.
“I didn’t mean it like that. You know I love being with you. I’m here, aren’t I? I’m just saying I really like being with him. He makes me laugh. He’s not a dick, ya know? He really likes me. He takes me to dinner. He cares about me. He’s a real boyfriend, not like those other idiots I dated where we just randomly hung out.”
“I thought you said you just wanted something fun? Remember you said you didn’t want him falling for you?”
“I did say that, didn’t I?” She smiles slyly. “I guess I changed my mind.”
“Meg… are you falling in love with him?”
Her cheeks turn pink, and it’s adorable. “I think I might be.”
“Oh my God,” I say happily. “Have you said it? Has he?”
She shakes her head. “Not yet, but I’m pretty sure we’re both feeling it.”
“That’s awesome. Last year you thought he was a nerd and now look.”
“Right? Life is so bizarre.”
Nodding, I slide my hand under the UV light, hoping it’s safe. I’m a little leery of things Megan buys off the internet.
“We have to find you someone so we can double-date. Remember when we were little, we always wanted to grow up and double-date? Erik and I were talking about his friend Carson. He’s a little odd, but he might be fun for you.”
I crinkle my nose and shudder inside. “I’m not going to date someone named Carson.”
“Why not? He’s cute… in a strange way.”
Great. Sounds like a winner.
“Because Carson is a last name,” I reply. “It’s not even a name, it’s two things stuck together. Car and son.”
She gives me a frustrated frown. “It’s just his name, Skylar.”
“I don’t like it.”
Letting out a sigh, she scrapes a file across her nail. “You’re so weird. You focus on the strangest things.”
“And your point?” I say, grinning.
“It’s cute, but you’re limiting your options. You can’t be so picky about food and men. You’ll be hungry and single forever.”
“I’m not picky about food, Meg,” I say defensively. “Men, yes. But not food. It’s different.”
Her shoulders slump. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. I know you can’t help the food thing. You’re getting better, though. I’m so proud of you for eating that cookie.”
Earlier we ate the last two wedding cookies together before we came upstairs with the nail apparatus.
“I like my therapist. She’s like talking to a friend instead of a doctor. I’ve only seen her a few times, but I already think she’s helping me. We talk about everything, not just my eating disorder.”
I’m not ready to tell Megan I’m taking an antidepressant. Just the word makes me uncomfortable. Antidepressant. I’m not depressed. I’m happy and I have goals. It’s not like I’m holing up in the bedroom all day, refusing to leave, wishing I didn’t exist.
“What does the therapist think about you getting married for insurance?”
Gawd. It sounds so bad when it’s actually said like that. It makes me sound like I’m involved in an insurance scam, or like I’m using Jude.
“I didn’t want to tell her at first, but the only way she can help me is if I’m honest about everything. I could tell she was shocked, but it’s not her job to judge me. If it wasn’t for Jude, I wouldn’t be able to see her in the first place.”
Because I’m not on Jude’s plan yet, I’ve paid cash for the first few appointments. But if I had to be in therapy long-term without insurance, I’d be broke in a month and have to stop going.
“True,” Megan says. “It’s just a really weird situation.”