Snatching my phone and my keys off the coffee table, I grin at her. “Let’s go. We’ll get him everything he needs. You can bring him with us, and he can pick out toys.”
Her expression lights up as if I just turned into a unicorn right in front of her. “Really?”
“Of course.”
“Can we stop by the craft store while we’re out? I want to get some paint stuff.”
I throw her a quizzical look as I snap the leash on the dog. “Paint stuff?”
“Yes. I have a list.” She grabs her notebook off the end of the couch and flips the pages to a numbered handwritten list. “See? I need all this stuff to paint pictures. I don’t know why. I just want to try it.”
“Oh. I thought you meant to paint the walls.”
She shakes her head as she shoves the list into her purse. “No, I want to paint scenes. On canvas. I still want to paint the walls, but that’s different. Kenzi’s going to do that with me.”
“Okay.” Ember could never draw or paint, but if she wants to try now, why not? “We’ll get you all set up.”
Smiling, she touches my arm and cranes her head up to kiss my cheek. “Thank you. I’m so glad Teddy’s here with us. I can’t stop smiling.”
“That’s all I want. A smile on your face every day.”
I hated shopping all the years I was alone, but shopping with Ember and watching her make decisions is fascinating to me. She contemplates everything, holding things in her hands and studying them, comparing prices. All of it proves her brain is working. Like the inside of a clock, all the pieces are moving and working together like they’re supposed to.
Her recognition of the dog only proves her memories are still there. There’s no rhyme or reason to them. They might be jumbled up and sporadic, but they’re there.
By the time we get home, feed the dog, and get all her paint stuff set up in a corner of the porch, Ember’s exhausted and falls asleep on her bed while I’m in the shower. She and Buddy—now Teddy—look so content all curled up together that I can’t even be upset that I’ll be back to sleeping alone tonight.
Chapter Thirty-One
Breathe.
I’m Ember.
This is my home.
Asher is my husband.
These are my family and friends.
My name is Ember Valentine.
I’m happy to see you.
I squeeze the damp water bottle and press it against my cheek. The distraction of the chill takes the edge off my rising anxiety. Temporarily, at least.
The window is a barrier between myself and the twenty-or-so people talking and laughing in our backyard.
Asher told me we’ve been hosting Friday night barbecues for years, but this is the first one since I came home from the hospital. He presented it to me as a way for our closest family and friends to meet baby Tia and, for lack of a better word, for me to re-meet them in a casual atmosphere.
But to me, it doesn’t feel casual. It feels terrifying having a crowd of people at our home that I don’t know or recognize. Other than maybe five of them.
A few of the guys I recognize from photos Asher and Kenzi have shown me, but since they all have long hair and tattoos, it’s hard to tell them apart. If their significant others stay next to them, I can use the girls as a tool to help me differentiate between them.
The one with the tiny blonde.
The one with the big-eyed brunette.
The one with the girl with burgundy hair and the sweet smile.
This is what my life has come down to. Thank God people can’t read my thoughts.
Muscular arms encircle me from behind, and I lean back against his rock-hard chest. “How’s the prettiest girl in the world doing?”
My cheeks flush. “Is that me?”
“Always and only.”
Butterflies. He still does it to me.
He turns me in his arms to face him, then studies my face like he’s trying to find a pathway into my head. “You okay?”
“It’s a lot of people. I’m afraid to go out there. If someone talks to me, I won’t know who they are, and it’s going to be so uncomfortable.”
I thought by now Asher would’ve grown impatient with me and the countless frustrations of our situation. Honestly, what man wouldn’t? But his eyes are still filled with nothing but love and understanding. His touch is always soft and reassuring.
He’s a rock.
“I know it’s hard for you,” he says. “But everyone out there knows you, cares about you, and loves you. They know you don’t remember them. That’s why they’re here, so you can get to know them again. So we can suck you into our crazy family again and make you love us.”
I’m already falling in love with Asher. I find myself thinking about him all the time, and on my hardest and darkest days, he has a way of making everything better. We still have more hurdles than an obstacle course, the biggest one being pre-accident Ember and how she’s haunting both of us.