I found out where she lived and barely restrained myself from staking out her apartment. But I couldn’t resist asking about her in the most discreet ways.
When people grew suspicious of my attention I lied and said I was considering her for a position in my company. That usually took them off the scent.
No one had a bad word to say about her, and there was none of the usual cattiness from other women who were threatened by her beauty.
I knew I was getting to her though she did a good job of pretending I didn’t. I’d seen her through the glass more than once when she didn’t know I was there.
She’s always at ease until I show up. Then she becomes nervous and defensive. I’d even seen her watching the door for me a time or two, checking her watch and the parking lot.
I’d hide around the side of the building like a teenage boy and grin at her antics, knowing that I was wearing her down.
But still she refuses to give in. She was the only woman who’d made me work so hard for it, the only one I even considered putting myself through the run around for.
For some reason I’d got it into my head that she was the one for me, so no matter how often she shot me down, I kept coming back.
No one who knew me would believe that such a thing was possible. That I’d let this slip of a girl put me through my paces when I could have any number of women with the snap of a finger.
I’d decided though that this was going to be the last time I asked her out. Maybe she had her reasons for denying me, something that I hadn’t uncovered when I went digging into her life.
It would suck if I couldn’t win her over, but I can’t force her to accept me if she was so dead set against it, no matter how much I hate the thought of losing her. Deep down inside I just know that we’d be perfect together.
I have no answers for it, for the way I’ve been like a dog with a bone with this one. It’s just one of those things you feel in your soul. And for the first time in my life someone had touched me deep enough to make me think beyond the next fuck.
It was frustrating as hell though, that she didn’t seem to feel the same way. And I found myself getting angry at her now as we did the same dance again.
Cade
“What’s your answer going to be?” I placed the water glass back on the table, too annoyed to take a sip. That’s another thing. I’ve never been so invested in a woman before that her actions got a rise out of me. Maybe this was my penance for being a dog all these years, from high school ‘til now.
So far I’ve been taking her rejections in stride, but since I’d given myself this deadline I was worried that she really would hold out and that I’d walk away empty handed.
That’s just the way I’m made. If I tell myself this is it, then no matter what, that’s what it’ll be. Of course she could have no idea any of this shit is going on inside my head. But it’s the way I’ve always done things. Saves me from wasting my damn time.
I knew she was interested, so why won’t she let me have her? She didn’t know that this would be the last time I ask, but she had to know the end was drawing near. I’m not a complete moron to keep coming back. I have my pride after all.
But could I really do it? Could I walk away from her knowing what I feel for her? How the fuck does that work? Why is life so fucking cruel? Or am I being the spoilt brat I’ve been accused of being in the past?
Granted that was long ago when I was still a child. But maybe as a man I’m still prone to getting my way and expect this to be no different. Or maybe it’s because I’ve never been turned down before.
How was she able to resist me when each time I left her, I felt like I’d left something very vital behind? How is she not feeling the same shit that’s been plaguing me for the past few weeks?
“What if I go out with you? What then? You’re looking for a good time right? Well I’m not that kind of girl, so you’re wasting your time.”
There was something in her eyes even as she tried to give me the brush off. Something that told me she was fighting her own feelings. It gave me hope.
“If all I wanted was a good time angel I could find a much easier way to do it.” She didn’t have a comeback for that one so just took my order and went away again.