The more I thought, the more confusing things became. “How do they know the kids are okay? When is the last time they saw them?” I hadn’t been afraid all this time, choosing to believe that whoever had taken my kids didn’t mean to harm them.
But now, as we made our way to their location, unreasonable fear threatened my mind. What if this person panicked? What if they destroy the kids the same way they’d planned to do with the cabin?
“They said they were still alive a few days ago when they went to the house for instructions. From what they said this sick chick isn’t about hurting the kids. It seems her…she was after sis more than anything else.”
He said the last below his breath but loud enough for me to hear. He looked back at Zandi who was sitting still as a stone just staring straight ahead. I got the feeling she wasn’t even here with us.
“We’re almost there sis don’t worry.” Her eyes barely flicked to his in recognition before she went back to her blank stare.
I was sitting at an awkward angle in the front passenger seat while she sat in the back with her hand in mine as he drove. I wouldn’t have been able to drive even had I wanted to. My nerves were shot and my body was tense as hell.
I couldn’t name my emotions then if you paid me. Numb is the first thing that comes to mind. I feel like I’m holding my breath until I have my son and daughter in my arms.
There’s no real fear, not yet. But a strong sense of something I’ve only known once before in my life. The night I realized she was gone. I’d felt this same debilitating numbness then too. These last few days I’ve kept myself from dwelling on my kids and where they could be, past the norm.
I wouldn’t allow myself to think too much because my mind would always undoubtedly go to the worst. So instead when I did let my mind go to them, I bypassed all this and went straight to the part where they were home safe.
I can’t imagine how she’s feeling right now and I can’t take the time to bring her out of wherever the hell she’d gone to in her head. I squeezed her hand reassuringly and raised it to my lips with my heart bleeding inside.
If this is what she needed to do to get her through then so be it. But it was spooky as hell how she’d shut herself off after the last few hours spent raging at me.
I guess there’re new sides to her that I’m gonna have to learn. There’s no telling what she’s had to learn after spending two years at the mercy of others. I can’t think about that shit either because it’ll make my ass postal.
My phone went off in the silence of the truck and damn near startled all of us. It did one good thing, which was take my mind off the path it was headed.
I was surprised to see the doctor’s name pop up on the screen. I’d forgotten all about my own brush with a health scare and the fact that I was still waiting for answers. Then I remembered that he was her doctor too. “This is Cade.”
“Mr. McClintock, Dr. Reynolds here. Listen, normally I wouldn’t do this, but I understand the severity of your particular situation so I’m going to go against protocol just this once…”
“What is it Doc?” It was obvious from his tone that he was struggling to tell me whatever the hell it was. Of course my first thought was of her and I braced myself for it.
I’d taken all I was gonna take when it comes to her and the shit she’d been through. Too much more of the bullshit and somebody’s gonna die.
“Well it’s the strangest thing, but we’ve finally got the results from all the tests we ran on both of you. The reason yours took so long was because we couldn’t find the drug that was in your system. In any case, it seems that it was the same one used on your wife.”
“What? How is that possible? We weren’t together…” I started trying to piece shit together in my head but once again came up empty. “Do you have a name for it?”
“No, we know the composition but nothing like this is on the market. I’m going to have to turn some of my findings over to the Feds. It looks like someone has manufactured a new mind altering drug.”
When he hung up I was still deep in thought. How can that be possible? How or when did I come in contact with the person who’d taken her? And how were they able to drug me? “Everything alright?”