Buttons & Hate (Buttons 2)

I belonged to her.

She was the only woman who had any power of me. If she wanted something, I would take care of it. There was nothing I would do for her. If she asked for a piece of the sun I would figure out a way to give it to her.

Sometimes it scared me.

The connection was intimidating because of the power in contained. If she walked away from me, I would be crippled. If she decided she wanted to return to America, all I could was watch her leave. My life without her would never be the same. Without even realizing, I’d become attached.

Sickly attached.

She slept in my bed every night and rode my cock in the morning. She called my name when I made her come. She kissed me every night before bed and every morning before work.

And she made me drop to my knees.

What the fuck happened to me?

“Are you alright?” Button held the closed book in her hand and she watched me with concern.

“Fine.” My previous thoughts drifted away like smoke from a fire. “Why?”

“You’ve been staring at me for nearly ten minutes.”

“I always stare at you.”

“This was different.” She set the book on the table and turned her body toward mine.

I sat behind the desk at the vineyard, thinking about things I shouldn’t. When I was at the property I was supposed to work, not consider my feelings for my lover. Was she my lover? “Have a lot on my mind.”

“Maybe you should call it a day.”

“Maybe.” I turned off the iPad and stowed everything inside my desk.

“Anything I can do?” She came behind me and rubbed my shoulders, relaxing the tense muscle underneath the fabric.

“You can lay at the foot of the bed when we get home.”

“Ooh...sounds good to me.”

I left the desk and grabbed my jacket from the coat rack. “Ready to go?”

“Yeah.” A sexy grin was on her face, her mind elsewhere. “I’m just not sure if I can wait until we get home...”

***

“Can I ask you something?” She spoke from the passenger seat.

She always asked me questions on the drive, probably because she knew I couldn’t get away. “Yes.”

“You like it when I call the shots?”

I knew she was referring to our reversal of roles. It happened rarely, but when it did it was hot. She wouldn’t let me come until she was completely satisfied. And even then, she made me work for it. The brutal way she pushed me around like I was doormat turned me on. “Sometimes.”

“Have you...ever done that with someone else?”

Never. “No.”

“I’m the first woman to take control?”

“One and only.”

She looked out the window and processed what I said.

“You like it. I can tell.”

“I do.” She admitted it without a fuss.

“Having the kind of power is exhilarating. It can get addicting.”

“You don’t say?” A slight smile was on her lips. “I’m surprised you let me do it to you. You seem like a man who...hates letting someone take over.”

“You’re right. I do hate it.” I followed the road until we approached the estate. I could see it in the bottom of the valley, waiting for us to arrive. “But with you I enjoy it.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re strong. I’ve never met a strong woman before.”

“You could easily overpower me.”

“You don’t have to be large to be strong. Strength comes from a place deep inside us. It’s the ability to deflect pain, to persevere when failure hits in the face like cold rain. It’s refusal to break under someone else’s reign. It’s a lot of things. Size is irrelevant.”

She turned back to me, a thoughtful expression on her face. “You’re strong too.”

Not as strong as I wanted to be. My past haunted me every day. My regret choked me and refused to let go. I would be forever terrorized by the things that couldn’t be changed. Button had experienced her fair share of heartbreak but she continued to carry on. I just passed through life, my heart and soul locked up tight so no one could ever get in. “You ask a lot of questions.”

“I’m a curious person.”

“Nosey, more like it.” The corner of my mouth rose so she knew I was joking.

She gave me a gentle pinch in the side. “Shut up.”

I tickled her back. “You shut up.” I pulled into the roundabout and allowed my valet to take the car. My arm immediately went around Button and I walked inside the estate I shared with her. It was a big place for once person. Somehow, it was even bigger for two people.

“So...can I lead when we get to the bedroom?” She moved into my side as we took the stairs to the top floor.

“No.”

“No?”

“Dominance isn’t something you can ask for. You have to take it.” Listening to her ask for control was a turn off. I liked it when it came from nowhere, where she demanded to have me right then and there. That’s when I let my walls down and I allowed her to control me. I trusted her to please me, to make me feel good in ways I never thought were possible. I’d tried enough new things with her to trust the new things we would experience together.