The Shadow (The Florentine 2)

“You left me.” She gripped his arms at the wrists, holding his hands to her face. “Why?”

His gray eyes bored into hers. “If I’d stayed, it would have meant death.”

“For you or for him?”

William pulled away and stood, running his fingers through his hair. “He had a powerful relic in his possession. If I hadn’t fled, if I’d been drawn into battle with him, he would have realized my strength.” William clenched his jaw. “I would have had to kill him.”

Raven turned her face away.

“I have no compunction about killing him,” William continued quietly. “I’ve killed members of the Curia before. But to do so would be an act of war.”

He sighed. “Also, I am not eager to kill the man who rescued you and your sister. I hate the Curia. Their aim is to destroy us; my aim is to defend myself and my people. To remain this evening would have meant the death of one of us—your priest or your lover. I made the choice to leave, saving us both. I doubt your priest would have done the same.”

Raven looked over and found William watching her. He was standing some distance away, in front of his desk, his posture ramrod straight.

She cleared her throat. “Father Kavanaugh left for Rome. I tried to reason with him. I asked him not to bring the Curia here, but he said he doesn’t make those decisions. He also said the Curia knows you’re conservative in your rule, but they don’t want the existence of vampyres exposed to the world.”

“The Curia is always eager to preserve its power.” William spoke bitterly. “I must find the traitor. Quickly.”

He maintained his distance, his posture growing increasingly defensive, as if he were preparing for a blow. “What else did you tell him?”

Raven approached William slowly. She picked up one of his fists and cradled it in her hands. “I told him I love you. I told him you wouldn’t hurt me.”

William’s upper lip curled in derision. “Love is a myth to them. They understand power and control, but little else.”

“He was relieved I haven’t fed from you.”

“Of course,” William scoffed. “We can’t have his pristine Raven sullied by the monster’s blood.” He sighed. “But he’s right to be worried. Once you’ve ingested a certain amount of blood, you begin to change.” William paused, his eyes appearing to darken. “And there’s the bond that exists when blood is exchanged.”

“I have a difficult time believing we could be bonded more than we are already.”

He lifted her hand and pressed his lips to the back of it, as if that were an answer.

“At the moment, your soul is in peril because you’re fornicating with a vampyre. No doubt he believes I’m controlling you. But what he truly fears is that you’ll become a vampyre, because then he’d be obligated to kill you.”

Raven shivered once again. “I don’t think he’d do that.”

William’s hand moved to her shoulder. “Do not underestimate his loyalty to the Curia. They have one mission and one mission alone, and that is to destroy us. Any affection he has for you will be pushed aside if you oppose them.”

Raven lifted her chin. “I don’t believe it.”

“Try.” William crossed over to the large wall of windows on the far side of the library, turning his back on her.

“Funny how you’re so sure you know him and what he’ll do,” Raven called to William. “He’s so sure he knows you and what you’ll do. I’m caught in the middle, convinced you’re both wrong.”

A flexing of his shoulders was William’s only response.

“Father Kavanaugh is wrong about you. I can’t help but believe you’re equally wrong about him.”

“That’s a dangerous inference.” William spoke without turning around. “He gave you a powerful relic to ward me off.”

“Which I removed from my apartment.” She leaned the hip of her injured leg against his desk, needing the support. “He said you chose this life.”

“He knows nothing,” William spat out, turning around.

“He said he wants to free you.”

William strode toward her, his body almost a blur. “You’ve known him since you were a child. Did you know he was part of the Curia?”

Raven scowled at his accusatory tone. “Of course not! I didn’t even believe in vampyres before I met you. You know that.”

William continued to glare at her, his eyes blazing.

“He asked me to go to Rome with him. I refused. And even though you aren’t asking the question, I’ll answer by telling you that I didn’t reveal any of your secrets or any of your troubles in the principality.” She cursed. “I’m your lover, William, not your enemy.”

His posture relaxed somewhat and he lifted a hand to trace the arc of her cheek.

“I know,” he whispered.

“Father thinks you’re possessed.”

“Undoubtedly.”

“Why does he think that?”

William dropped his hand. “I tried to explain it to you once, while we were in this room.”

“All I can remember is you talking about light and darkness.”

Raven moved to sit on top of William’s desk in order to take the weight off her leg. She exhaled her relief.

“Just so,” William mused. “You can see the possessive power of the darkness in ferals. They lack rationality. They behave like animals. Vampyres maintain their rationality, but there are times when the darkness clouds it. Or overtakes it.” His gaze dropped to one of the candles that sat on his desk, and he stared at the flickering flame.

“The darkness is a demon?”

“The Curia thinks so.”

“What do you think?”

William’s eyes met hers. “All I know is my own experience. I feel the presence of the darkness; I feel its power and its influence. But I am able to overcome it, at least, on occasion.”

He cleared his throat. “When I came upon you in the alley, I was tempted to feed from you. I was tempted to share you with Aoibhe and the others.”

“But you didn’t.” Raven clasped her hands together.

“No, I did not. I remembered how I felt when I found Alicia. I failed her, but I would not fail you.”

Raven touched his sleeve. “Your humanity saved you.”

“No.” William jerked away from her. “Humanity has its own darkness. You of all people know that. It was the memory of goodness and the resolve to preserve it that enabled me to save you. I’d do it again, and again, without regret. If I lived a thousand years, I would make the same choice.”

His profile appeared resigned and vulnerable.

Raven blinked back tears. “Did you choose to become a vampyre, William?”

He pretended not to hear and approached the desk. He made his hand pass through the candle’s flame, over and over again, the movements rhythmic and hypnotic.

“William?” she prompted.

“Yes.”

Raven felt a tightness in her chest. She pressed her hand over her heart, as if in an effort to release it. “I thought for sure Father Kavanaugh was wrong about that. I thought someone forced you into this life.”

“Sadly, no. Once again, I can only speak from my experience, but I have the suspicion that transformations only occur when the humans are willing to give themselves over to the change.”

“Was that how it was when you transformed someone?”

“I don’t know,” he confessed, holding his hand in the flame. “I’ve never changed anyone.”

“Stop.” Raven grabbed his wrist and pulled his hand from the fire.

“It doesn’t hurt.” He held his palm in front of her face. “See? No harm done.”

“You’ve harmed me by doing that in front of me. And you’ve self-harmed by treating your body with indifference.”

William placed his hand palm up on her thigh. “I didn’t mean to harm you.” His voice was like a child’s.

She lifted his palm to her lips and kissed it, surprised by the heat that radiated from

his unmarked skin. “I’m glad you’re all right.”

His gaze flickered to the surface of the desk. “I remember when I tried to prove to you I was a vampyre. I stuck a dagger in my hand.” William’s eyes lifted to hers. “You were so upset. You wanted to use your white sweater to stem the bleeding.”

“I love you, William. Of course I don’t want to see you hurt.”

“There’s very little on this earth that can hurt me,” he whispered, his expression solemn. “But I shall be more careful, my little lark with the large heart.”

“Only when it comes to you.”

“Ah, but that’s not true, Defensa. And we both know it.”

“Why haven’t you transformed someone?”