“Did you see her?” Eileen asks, her bright blue eyes shifting quickly between me and Ethan a couple of times until she finally chooses to keep them on Ethan. Typical.
“Yes, I’m sorry. My condolences,” Ethan replies.
“Dan Peterson. Thank you so much for bringing Amber,” Dan, ever the gentleman, says with an outstretched hand.
“Ethan Vaughn.” The men shake hands. “No need to thank me.” Ethan tightens his grip on my shoulder again.
“You need to sign off so they can send the body to the funeral home,” I tell Eileen in a flat voice I barely recognize.
“I was thinking to send her to Long Island. Easier to make arrangement––”
Her words ignite a fire in my chest. “She left specific instructions. She is NOT going to Long Island because it’s easier for you.”
“Alright, alright ladies. No need to argue. If she left instructions that she wanted to be sent to her old place then so be it––”
“But Dan––” my mother whines, cutting Dan off.
“Honey––seems only right to follow her wishes.”
On Dan’s insistence, Eileen pouts and pouts, and eventually acquiesces.
“No use in waiting until Friday. Everyone she knows is dead. Let’s do it as soon as possible.” With that I start walking away. I hear Ethan giving Dan his number and telling him to call if he needs help with anything.
When he catches up to me, he grabs me by the shoulders and turns me. His face inches from mine, his shrewd eyes dart all over my face––assessing my state of mind no doubt. I stare back with total apathy in my eyes. His mouth tightens and the next thing I know I’m wrapped up in a big hug, his arms steel bands around me, my face buried in his neck and his scent filling my lungs.
“I don’t want you to worry about anything,” he murmurs. “I’ll take care of everything…I’ll take care of you.”
No. No, I don’t want him to take care of anything––especially not me. He can’t be this good to me. I’m already so deep in love I’m suffocating under the weight of it.
I pry myself from his firm grip, from his comfort, and look up into his face. “I don’t want you to do anything. Everything’s been taken care of anyway. My grandmother made all the arrangements.”
I don’t wait to see what his face tells me. I turn and walk to the parking lot.
After a long, drawn-out conversation I convince Camilla and her parents not to attend. I want this to be over as quickly as possible and without fanfare. Justin puts up a fuss but I manage him deftly as well. There’s only one person that I can’t manage to dissuade, and that’s Ethan.
“There’s no point in you coming. Fredo will drive me to New Jersey. Don’t you have a ton of work to do?”
The intense vibes scalding the back of my neck gets my attention. I turn, holding the black dress I retrieved from the closet and find him wearing a disapproving look; I would even go as far as to say that he looks offended. Dressed and ready to go, he shoves his hands into the pockets of his impeccable dark suit.
“Are we friends? We’re friends, right?” he says, his expression growing more indignant by the minute.
Sigh. Looking into determined brown eyes, a melty event happens in the environ of my heart.
“Of course we’re friends, you dope.”
Friends. Right. Sliding the zipper down, I step into the dress and walk over to him for assistance zipping it up.
“So if the situation were reversed, you would do it for me, wouldn’t you? Our maybe the definition of friendship needs to be clarified.”
There he goes again, lawyering me to death. It’s official, I will never win an argument with this man. “Stop out-thinking me. You’re being rude.”
“You should be used to it by now.” Our eyes meet over my shoulder, mine practically stuck in the roll back position, his looking as pleased with himself as ever. With a well placed kiss on the side of my neck, he zips up the dress. Discussion over.
It occurred to me when Ethan was driving us to the cemetery that there is no actual reason for me to speak to, or see my mother ever again. If I want to be, I could be free of her…if I want to be. Because that would mean I would be free of Audrey and Dan as well.
The day is cloudy. We get there the same time Dan pulls in. Audrey is the first one out of their car. She’s wearing a dark shirt, a purple pleated miniskirt and black leggings. Her hair is in princess Leia buns. She runs into me with enough force to almost knock me down, and hugs my waist in a death grip. I smile for the first time in days.
Everyone is quiet as we walk to the gravesite. This cemetery is very large and riddled with hills. I don’t fail to note that Eileen is wearing four inch heels. By the looks of the red soles, Louboutins. In contrast, I’m wearing ballerina flats.