That’s it. “Damn it, Aiden. I don’t fucking love him—I love you.”
He looks up then, his eyes wide and his jaw hanging open. I hate that tears start to fall down my cheeks, but damn it, here I am. “I have loved you my whole entire life. I put you on a pedestal and admired you up there. When you finally saw me, I knew, from that moment on, there was no way in hell I was letting you go. I know I am hard to deal with. I may clean a lot, and I’ve got one hell of a mouth, but I would never hurt you. I would never ruin this. Not with how much I love you.”
He draws in deep breaths, his gray eyes dark and wild as he holds my gaze. I wait for him to say he loves me too, but he just stares at me. He looks absolutely terrified, and it knocks the air out of me. Why isn’t he saying he loves me too?
Defeated, I look down at my feet. “But if you can’t see that, if you can’t trust me or even love me, then what the fuck is the point, Aiden? I don’t deserve that, not with how loyal and patient I’ve been with you.”
I wait for him to stay something, but he’s just staring at me, his jaw hanging open. I don’t understand; I don’t even know what is happening. How can he not realize he loves me? I know he does. I feel it. Damn it. I turn around and head back across the lawn. He doesn’t call my name or even stop me.
Maybe he doesn’t love me.
“Are you okay?”
“Fine,” I say simply as I lean back in my seat on my mom’s plane. “He didn’t call or text me last night, so I’m pretty sure we’re over. Which is fine since I am going to get this part and move back to New York.”
“Wow. You sound very detached, but I can hear the tears in your voice,” Amelia says, and I wipe away a stupid tear. “You’re not okay.”
“I’m not, but it is what it is.”
“Shelli, call him.”
“No. I put it all out there, and he just stared at me.”
She lets out a long breath. “Shelli, you’ve been telling me since the rip that he’s skittish and is terrified of commitment. What did you think was going to happen?”
I close my eyes. “I was hoping, by now, he had figured out we have a great thing and he loves me.”
“Oh honey, I wanted that too. But maybe he isn’t ready to accept it. He’s been single his whole life until you.”
“Which means I should be enough. He settled down for me, yet he won’t admit it.”
“Shelli, you’re more than enough, and I honestly think he knows that. I saw the way he looked at you, and I saw how he wanted to rip Nico’s head off. He’s scared.”
I hate that word. I hate that he feels like that. “Which is fine, but haven’t I done enough to make him comfortable?”
“Shelli, this isn’t you. It’s him.”
“So, what do I do?”
“Call him.”
“No way. The puck is in his zone.” I know that’s my pride talking, but I refuse. I’ve done everything thus far; it’s all on him now.
She snorts. “So corny.”
I can’t even smile. I just feel empty. I hate not talking to him. I hate that he allowed Nico to come between us once more. I never even loved that guy. I’ve only ever loved Aiden, and I don’t understand how he doesn’t realize that.
“In other news, my mom is dead set on us getting married before the baby comes.”
I roll my eyes. “She’s insane.”
“Right? But she’s happy. She told me she was proud of me last night.”
I smile. “You’re going to be an awesome mom, Am.”
“And you’re gonna be the best aunt.”
“Damn right. That baby is gonna be spoiled rotten.”
Amelia laughs. “Between the Adlers, the Justices, and the Moons, I’d say so.”
“For real, and the baby will be super loved.”
“So loved,” she agrees just as the flight attendant stops beside me.
“Ms. Adler, there is an issue with takeoff.”
I scrunch up my face. “Am, let me call you back.” I hang up and then stand. “What’s wrong?”
“There is a gentleman outside who says he needs to speak to you, but he isn’t on the manifest, so I can’t let him on.”
“Huh?” I ask, and then I walk past her to the entrance of the plane.
When I look down the stairs, I see Aiden standing at the bottom. His bag is hanging on his shoulder, and he’s wearing a nice blue suit that hugs every inch of him. His hair is down, tucked behind his ears, but all I see are those gray eyes that are swimming in despair.
“They won’t let me on.”