“I want to make her listen to me. I don’t want to wait. I don’t want to spend another second without her.”
“You’re gonna have to accept that you will. For at least a little bit, dude,” Shea says. “But then there will be a perfect moment, and that’s when you need to score.”
I blink, completely confused. “Huh?”
“Jesus, he really does take after you,” Shea teases, and Dad laughs.
“The gala, Aiden,” Dad says simply.
“The gala?”
Dad shakes his head with a sigh. “Maybe he does take after me.”
They both laugh, yet I’m completely in the dark.
I guess that’s where I belong.
Alone.
But that doesn’t sit right with me.
I want her back.
I need her back.
I’m going to get her back.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Shelli
“I’m not one to say you’re overreacting, but I think you are.”
I roll my eyes as I climb up the stairs of Mordor—also known as the StairMaster in the Assassins’ gym. My mom has called me in for another meeting. I’m sure it’s to make sure everything is good for the gala tomorrow, but I don’t want to go. I don’t want to do anything, really. I’m so upset with Aiden, I honestly don’t know how to function. He’s called nonstop, but I have absolutely nothing to say to him. I can’t believe he said what he did. How dare he? If he didn’t mean it, then why say it? I want to wring his damn neck and tell him he’s an idiot, but I also want to hug him. It’s really complicated up here in my head.
I glance back at where Amelia is lying on the weight bench with a package of Sour Patch Kids. It’s her craving right now. “I don’t think I’m overreacting at all.”
“You are,” she says simply. “Believe me, I don’t want to defend Aiden since I’ve never figured out what you see in him, but he didn’t mean it, Shell. You know he didn’t.”
“I feel like he might have.”
She drops a piece of candy into her mouth. “Why?”
“He doesn’t say things without thinking them through. Believe me, I know. If he did, he would have said he loved me a long time ago. But the fact that he has kept that in check makes me believe his words are true.”
“That’s dumb,” she says, shaking her head. “He was trying to keep everyone from knowing about y’all. He wasn’t trying to hurt you.”
“I agree that he wasn’t, but that doesn’t mean he didn’t do it.”
“Shelli, come on.”
“Come on, what?”
“I think you need to talk to him.”
“I’d rather not. He’s too charming. He’ll get me to let it go, and then I’ll be back with him when, really, I probably never should have gotten with him.”
I feel her gaze on me. “You don’t have to be so tough with me,” she accuses, and I shrug.
“It’s true.”
“I don’t believe you. I think you know it’s all a big misunderstanding, but since he embarrassed the hell out of you in front of your parents, you’re gonna torture him until you’re not mad anymore.”
I shake my head. “I’m not even mad.”
“Lies.”
“Whatever. He hurt me.”
“And pissed you off.”
I bite my lip as I continue to climb to fucking nowhere, but I’m doing it because I want to look good in my fishnets when I go to New York. Don’t know why. I don’t have anyone to impress anymore. As much as I think that, I also don’t believe it. I don’t want things to be over with Aiden. I love him, but I’m just so mad. I don’t know why he had to say that. I know that Boon and Wes know about us, so what was his game? It doesn’t make sense to me, and it guts me. I don’t want to be just a fuck, and I really didn’t think I was. I mean, we had just been talking about living together, and when I said I loved him, I swear I saw it in his eyes. I swear he loves me too.
So I really don’t understand.
“Maybe instead of leaving your phone off, you could talk to him?”
I shake my head as my watch beeps that my workout is complete. “I can’t talk to him and keep my emotions in check.” I turn off the death machine and draw in a deep breath. “I miss him so damn much. And by talking to him, I’ll get stupid and let it go.”
“I mean, what is he supposed to do, Shelli? What do you want?”
“I don’t know.” I step off, gasping for breath. “I just want to forget it all.”
“So you want to be done?”
“No, I don’t,” I say, and I hate the emotion clogging my throat. Or maybe it’s the fact that I can’t breathe. “I don’t know. I just need some space.” I wipe my face free of sweat and then start stretching. “It scares me, Amelia. What if his words were true, but he doesn’t know it? Like how he doesn’t know he loves me?”