Me: Did you tell?
Shelli: No, asshole. I told them I didn’t know. Are you having fun, at least?
Relief floods me.
Me: Yeah, it’s been an amazing day.
Shelli: Well, that’s all that matters.
I bite my lip.
Me: Should I tell Chandler?
Shelli: About what?
Me: Drew. The reason we married and divorced?
Shelli: Do you want to?
Me: I do, but I don’t. I’m scared he’ll be disgusted with me.
Shelli: Well, I know for a fact he wouldn’t. He isn’t that way, Amelia.
I let my phone rest in my lap as I drop my head back. When Chandler told me he trusted me and was comfortable with me, I felt the same way. He’s been completely open with me about his divorce and his ex. I’ve been a closed book, and that’s not fair for him. He has a right to know.
When the door opens, he comes in, and immediately, his face lights up. “Hey there, gorgeous.”
I sigh softly. “Hey.”
His brow perks as he unbuttons his shirt. “You okay?”
“Yeah.” I sigh roughly. “Answering texts from my prodding family.”
He chuckles. “Well, I’m sure they’re better than mine. If my mom told you one more time that she absolutely loved you, I was gonna lose it. I’m worried she’s scaring you away.”
I shake my head as my mouth quirks at the side. “Not even kind of.”
He throws his shirt to the ground as he unfastens his pants. “That’s good,” he says before taking my phone out of my hand and tossing it to the side of the bed. I smile as he covers my body with his, hooking my leg around his hip. He caresses my nose with his before capturing my mouth in a passionate kiss. He makes me wild; my whole body catches on fire as I hook my other leg around him so I can feel all of him. When he pulls back, he cups my face with his hands and kisses my nose. “I’m so glad you’re here.”
I kiss his bottom lip. “So am I.”
“I don’t want you to leave tomorrow.”
I nod. “I don’t either.”
“Just six more days until I see you again.”
“Thankfully.”
He kisses me once more, and I sink into the kiss. Into him. I wrap my arms around his neck, holding him closer as he rolls to his side, taking me with him. We kiss and play, our hands roaming over each other’s bodies, cherishing the other. My heart is singing for him, and when he pulls back, needing to catch his breath, my eyes lock with his. I swallow hard, emotion threatening to smother me as I stare into his gaze.
“I got pregnant.”
His eyes widen as his brows squish together. “Excuse me?”
When I realize what I just said, which made no sense and scared the shit out of him, I bark out a laugh. “Whoa, sorry. Let me start over.”
He just stares at me as I swallow my laughter. I lick my lips before biting them. “Drew and I got married because I got pregnant.” His gaze softens as I look at his nose to avoid his eyes. “Since my mom hated him already, I knew if she knew we were pregnant and not married, she’d hate him more. So I begged him to marry me. He didn’t want to, he wanted to wait, but I nagged him until he did. We didn’t have a real wedding or anything. It was at the courthouse, and I think that pissed off my mom more.” Tears flood my eyes, and when I squeeze them shut, the tears escape to leak down my face. “I lost the baby a month later. While I was completely terrified to be pregnant, I was also excited. I was going to be a mom. I could put the baby in hockey or gymnastics. I had all these plans. I was married to my high school sweetheart, things were perfect…but within moments, it all changed.”
Chandler lifts my chin so our eyes meet. He strokes his fingers along my cheeks, catching my tears. He doesn’t say anything, but compassion and sympathy are in his eyes. I don’t want to go on, but I know I need to. I bite the inside of my cheek so hard it hurts before I close my eyes. “When I told him I lost the baby, he was so happy. He said we didn’t need a kid, and then he told me he knew he shouldn’t have married me so quickly.” I open my eyes to see such rage in Chandler’s expression. “I think that’s when I knew my marriage was doomed.”
Within seconds, Chandler smothers me in his arms. He trails kisses along my hairline and forehead before meeting my mouth with his. His kiss is different; it’s comforting instead of hot.
When he pulls away, his eyes burn into mine. “He didn’t deserve you.”
A sob bubbles in my throat as I nuzzle my nose into his neck. Chandler is right. I just wish I had realized that before I wasted so many years on Drew. Especially when I could have spent them with Chandler. I know there is more to tell him, and I want to, but this was a step in the right direction. I’m proud of that. But I can’t help worrying what he’ll think when he learns why I left Drew. Will he support me? Or will he be completely and utterly disgusted by me? I’m disgusted by me, so why shouldn’t he be? But why do I have to think that? He isn’t disappointed now or even appalled by me. He is supportive and kind. That’s Chandler. He’s wonderful. That said, I once thought Drew was wonderful too. Why the hell do I have to be so scared to make the same mistake when they’re two different people?