After I click it on, I get back to work as I wait for Callie to come down. I turn on the stove to make her a breakfast sub, something she has been urging me to sell, but the lunch and dinner rushes already kill me dead. I don’t think I could do a morning rush too. Especially with her not being here. She offered to homeschool so she could help me, but I refused before she could even finish her sentence. I was homeschooled through high school, and I missed out on everything. I don’t want that for her. I want more for her. I have to give her more.
I finish her sub and put it on the warmer so it’s toasty when she comes down, which won’t be for another thirty minutes. The shower is still running. But to my surprise, as I’m thinly slicing the tomatoes, I hear her walking down the stairs. I glance back as she rushes to me in only her towel, her hair wet and panic on her face.
“Aviva!”
My heart jumps in speed as I quickly wipe my hands. “What? What’s wrong?”
“Is this a lump?” Her voice is full of horror, and my heart stops in my chest. I meet her halfway across the kitchen as she drops her towel so her left breast is out. She developed early and had a full B cup at thirteen. She puts my fingers on the spot she was holding, and I dig my fingers into her breast. I lift her arm with my other hand and feel around, biting my lip as I try to calm down.
When I’m satisfied, I shake my head. “No. You’re about to start, right?”
“Yeah,” she says, gathering her towel, tears welling up in her eyes.
“It’s just that. You’re fine.”
Her shoulders drop in relief, and I admire my beautiful sister. She’s thin, thanks to the many hours she puts in at the gym next door. We share the same dark hair that curls naturally along our shoulders. Her deep green eyes are a bit darker than mine, but they have the same catlike shape to them. Her lips are a dark pink and very thick. While my bottom lip is thicker than the top, her lips are even and perfection. Her face is round, almost like a cherub. And just like a cherub, she’s a complete angel. My sweet, beautiful sister.
“Aviva, I can’t keep doing this.”
I turn back to the tomatoes as I nod. “Callie, the doctor said eighteen.”
“That’s not fair! I have two ticking time bombs on my chest.”
“I know, Cal. I know.”
She is frustrated, as am I. Her breasts give her an anxiety that hurts my soul for her. “With our history, I think I should be able to do it now. We have the money for the implants. Why can’t we do it?”
“Probably ’cause a sixteen-year-old doesn’t need implants,” I say, and she gives me a frantic look.
“Then I’ll wait for those until I’m eighteen. But please, I need these things off me.”
I meet her gaze. We’ve talked about this before, and she’s always wanted to wait so she could just have one surgery. “Are you sure?”
“Yes, I hate them, and they freak me out.”
“I know, but with gym—”
“I’ll be down for a week at most.”
I bite the inside of my cheek.
Callie continues, “You did it, and you’re awesome.”
Physically sure, but mentally, it’s up in the air. I nod. “I’ll make another appointment.”
She wraps her arms around me, and I lean my head into hers. “Thank you.”
“Of course. Now, go get ready so you aren’t late.”
She nods before she turns and heads upstairs. Out of my control, tears well up in my eyes, and I collapse into the counter as a sob shakes me to my core. I draw in a deep breath, trying to calm down. But for the love of God, she terrifies me. Like she said, those breasts are two ticking time bombs on her chest, and they freak me out too. I know she thinks it’s a good idea to just get rid of them, but it worries me that she’s scared and wants this out. I did that; I was terrified and went that route. It was painful and fucked with me mentally, but I didn’t have a choice. Callie needed me. I really don’t want that for her, but what other option is there?
Cancer takes who it wants.
* * *
While I wanted to fall face first in my bed once I closed the shop, Callie had texted me that her coach wanted to see me. It was a rough day. We were busy as all hell, and meanwhile, my mind has been consumed with thoughts of Callie’s breasts. Not really a great thing to think about, but they haunt me. Since I don’t have any, I have to worry about hers. I made the appointment with the doctor, but it isn’t for another week. I have to figure out a way to keep Callie from freaking out until we can go. Hopefully she’ll be too busy to think about it. Though, it didn’t matter how busy I was… I always thought of mine.