It was Graham who finally said something. “I’m kind of surprised to see you, honestly.”
“I know. I’m sorry for being so absent.”
“How come you didn’t tell me you were coming up?”
Rennie tilted her head up and smiled. “I wanted to surprise you. The lawsuit against you, totally bogus. You will have a new delivery driver, though, from the distribution company. Your normal driver saw you as an easy target, concocted this whole story to get money because the insurance company wouldn’t pay for his daughter’s care because she was at fault. She wasn’t even in the area at the time of her accident. The whole thing was really convoluted and has really left a bad taste in my mouth with the firm. Donna wanted to waste resources and money to bring the case to trial, but we had enough evidence to shut her down.”
He couldn’t deny it; he liked her surprise, and he was relieved, but something else bothered him. Her lack of communication. She rose to kiss him, and he allowed it but didn’t deepen the kiss. He pulled away and enveloped her with his arms. Graham looked out over the ocean, hoping to gain the strength and encouragement he needed for what he was about to say.
“Ren, we need to talk.”
He felt her move, and when he looked down, she stared at him. He bent forward, kissed her nose, and then took her and led her back to the pit. He sat down and expected her to sit next to him, but she sat between his legs, like they were seventeen all over again.
Graham pulled the blanket over her to keep her warm, like he had on the boat. He wished they had a fire, but it would take too long for him to start one, and it would likely attract people from the inn, and he wanted as much privacy as possible.
“I saw Grady today,” he started. “He really likes his new lawyer. Said things are very promising?”
Rennie nodded against Graham’s chest. “That’s good.” She inhaled and then exhaled slowly, gathering her thoughts. “I’m in this funk, and I don’t know how to get out of it. I know I’m shutting you out—Brooklyn too. I’m trying to find a way to deal with everything.”
“Do you remember when I told you I thought you needed time to get over Theo?”
She nodded against his chest.
“I want you to take the time, Rennie. You need it, and I need to focus on Grady. And I think . . .” Graham paused and fought back the tears. His heart ripped in two, and he prepared himself for what he was about to say. “I think we need to remain friends. I had come to you with the idea that we date, and you blew me off. I really feel like I’m giving so much of myself to you, being here, but I can never say no to you. As stupid as this sounds, I know I could take you back to my house, and we’d have sex because that is what we’ve been used to. Don’t get me wrong; the sex is great—but it doesn’t tell me the kind of person you are. I want to know who you are now. I don’t want to rely on memories. And as much as I love you, we’re not on the same path. The list of qualities you want in a partner—they’re not me. I’m never going to be financially stable; hell, I’ll probably die behind the bar. Sometimes I think I want a wife and a kid or two, and that’s not the life you want, and I’m okay with that because you’d be enough in my life.
“What we had when we were younger—it was great. The best time of my life. But if Grady’s rehab has taught me anything, it’s taught me that I can’t live in the past, and that is what I see when we’re together.” She had heard all this before, but he figured he’d repeat it, maybe help her accept she wasn’t ready for a relationship, at least not the kind he wanted to have.
Rennie pulled Graham’s arms tightly around her. They sat there for hours, watching the surf until the sun went down. When she finally moved, she got on her knees and placed her hands on Graham’s cheeks. “I love you, Graham Cracker. Don’t ever forget it.” She kissed him, stood, gathered her things, and walked away.
THIRTY-ONE
“I have never, in my life, been to a dry party.” Rennie sat in the sand while putting bottles of water, cans of pop, and juice boxes into a cooler.
“It’ll be good for you,” Brooklyn replied. “You can cleanse like the rest of us.”
That was what everyone vowed to do: cleanse. According to Brooklyn, Graham had approached the group of friends and asked if they’d be willing to forgo drinking for a bit, at least in front of Grady, to help in his sobriety. And when Rennie called Brooklyn to tell her she was coming up for the weekend, Brooklyn filled her in on everything that had happened in the last month.