An unexpected snarl twisted his mouth as he pinned me with his gaze. “Don’t you fucking talk like that.”
“Why not?” I shot back, using my pain as a weapon to protect myself. “You think I’m just going to lie back, let you use me and then raise your spawn like some pathetic loser?”
He rose abruptly, shocking me with how fast he got out of that chair and was in my face.
Cason palmed my belly roughly. “If my kid is in there, it will stay there.”
This time I couldn’t stop the tears as they splashed down my cheek. “Why? Why would you subject a child to the truth of its birth? How am I supposed to tell my kid, ‘Hey sweetheart, your daddy kidnapped me, got me pregnant in some convoluted revenge scheme against your uncle and then bailed.’ Makes for a great bedtime story, doesn’t it?”
Cason’s nostrils flared as he if were holding back but I could tell I’d hit a nerve.
Good. I hope that gut punch hurt.
He pulled away, his gaze never leaving me. “I will tie you to a bed for nine months if that’s what it takes.”
I shuddered, not sure if I was frightened by that prospect or aroused.
“You’re a bastard.”
“Yes, I am, sweetheart,” he agreed without shame. “Don’t forget it.”
“Oh, I won’t,” I assured him, wiping at my cheeks. Statistically, the chances of getting pregnant on the first time…maybe luck would be on my side. All I needed to do was make sure it didn’t happen again.
As if reading my mind, Cason smirked and said, “Better to be safe than sorry. I’ll give you time to clean up and rest but I’ll be inside you again very soon.”
I tried not to gasp. My body was still ringing from the tiny pulses of pleasure that were oblivious to the fact that I didn’t want to feel them any longer.
Cason had a way of twisting me into whatever he wanted and I craved that total possession in a way that frightened me.
I’d never pined for a man.
Never considered my life lacking because I was never noticed.
I liked it that way.
Or did I?
Because when Cason looked at me, all fire and hunger, I melted.
Whether I wanted to or not.
“Where am I supposed to clean up?” I asked stiffly.
He pointed to the small half-bath in the room. There was a toilet and a sink.
I cast a dark glare Cason’s way. “Are you serious? Am I supposed to take a lap around the toilet bowl?”
“Take a whore’s bath, sweetheart,” he replied as if that wasn’t the most insulting thing he could’ve said.
“I’m not a whore.”
“Figure of speech, honey.”
“And what, pray tell, is a whore’s bath?”
“Grab a washcloth, wet it, wipe down. Ta-da. Ready for action.”
“That’s disgusting.”
“It’s efficient.” He laughed, adding with a sexy smile, “Besides, I like the idea of you wearing my seed. Turns me on.”
Ugh. My mouth pursed. I didn’t want to turn him on. I wanted to punch him in the face.
But I’d never punched anyone in my life. I’m not even sure I knew how to do it properly. I’d probably end up missing and falling to the floor.
Cason yawned and gestured for me to get on with it. “I’m exhausted. Either do your thing or get in bed. I’m ready to sack out. I’ve never come so hard in my life. That’s a compliment.”
I didn’t dignify that comment with a response. I scooted away from him and walked briskly to the tiny bathroom, purposefully slamming the door.
I heard him chuckle from the other side.
Only when the door was safely locked did I let the real tears fall.
They were not tears of frustration but of hurt.
I know it was stupid, but I thought…
I couldn’t even say the words.
Shame clogged my throat.
I wanted to belong.
I reveled in the brief feeling that Cason saw me and only me.
The hunger I saw in his eyes hadn’t been for me, it’d been for the completion of his plan.
The fucking bastard.
Oh, God, it hurt.
Why?
Why was I so jacked up over a loser like Cason?
I stared into the mirror, seeing a fat girl who had become so adept at closeting herself away from the world that she’d missed out on crucial stepping stones in life.
I craved love.
I craved acceptance.
All the things I never had growing up.
And I’d thought, for the barest glimmer, that I’d find that with Cason?
Good grief, I was an idiot.
However, as my hand strayed to my belly, I realized I’d lied.
If I got pregnant…I would keep it.
But I wouldn’t let Cason come near me or the baby.
Chapter 19
Cason
I let Holly do her thing in the bathroom but every minute she wasn’t by my side, made me antsy.
I’d taken Holly’s virginity.
I may have gotten her pregnant.
The thought of her carrying my kid…it did weird things to me.
Means to an end, I reminded myself when I lingered too long.
Holly exited the bathroom and returned to the bed. She climbed in, taking a position the furthest from me and turned her back.
I laughed. Like that was going to fly.
I hooked my arm around her waist and pulled her to me.
She instantly stiffened but I wasn’t letting go.
Holly in my arms was the perfect antidote to my insomnia. My lids drooped as she finally settled with a huff of resignation. Her slow deep breathing told me she’d already dropped off to sleep.
I took a moment to simply enjoy the illicit pleasure of holding her.
She was soft and feminine, everything I couldn’t seem to get enough of.
She was spicy and challenging, hot and sweet at the same time.
How was it possible that no man had scooped her up yet?
Just the thought of another man putting his hands on her body made me tighten my hold around her.
She shifted in her sleep with a tiny whimper and I gentled my touch.
I smoothed a lock of hair way from her face and caressed her cheek.
She deserved better than being banged senseless in the heart of a sex dungeon.
My gut twisted with shame but I had to push the guilt aside.
I was doing this for a reason.
If I was a bastard
, Butcher was the king of evil.
Even his name was fitting.
Butcher.
Shay had been a good kid.
My sister, a loyal friend.
But Shay was dead and Christine was in a hospital bed, lying unresponsive.
And it was all Butcher’s fault.
So, yeah, I had things to do and they weren’t pretty.
But I wasn’t going to let what Butcher had done slide.
Not even if it meant sacrificing the beauty in my arms.
Chapter 20
Butcher
“Butcher…Holly is missing.”
I looked up from the woman in my lap, my smile fading. “What are you talking about?”
“Two nights ago, she didn’t come home.”
I shoved the whore off my lap, my rage instant. The woman scuttled off, no longer my interest. “And why am I just hearing about this?”
Johnny compressed his lips, unable to deny they’d slipped up. Instead, he said, “We’ll find her.”
“You better damn find her,” I growled. “I didn’t spend all that time grooming her to have you lose her.”
Johnny bobbed a nod and left my office. I prowled the space, jerking at the tie choking me. I hated wearing this monkey suit but I had a reputation to uphold.
People feared me because they knew I wasn’t simply some street rat. I was vicious with my punishments and ruled with an iron fist.
I was the king of these streets.
And Holly was mine.
The first time I saw her, she was a scared little thing, with bright eyes and chubby cheeks. That red hair caught my eye.
She was my porcelain doll.
I provided for her. Made sure she had the best of everything.
But I kept my distance for a reason.
I didn’t want to spoil the package before it was ready.
The timing of her disappearance seemed suspect.
I was just getting ready to collect my little bookworm.
I was about to introduce Holly to her new life.
With me.
But she was gone.
Who had the balls to steal from me?
I sank back into my chair and sent for the whore.
The woman, a short blonde with big, porn-star tits, returned with a frightened expression. I snapped my fingers and she quickly knelt between my legs, dutifully releasing my cock for her ready mouth.