Josh & Hannah (Redwood Falls 1)

“She’s already behind me. She says that I have to go.”

“Good … she’s right. So this is what you do. You go to College Station and you play your fucking ass off. When Ava turns eighteen, y’all get married and then you get family housing or something on campus. It’ll work, you’ll make it work.” When Ethan continued to silently stare at the ground, Josh continued, “Look … nobody knows about the baby yet, right? She probably won’t be showing for months yet. Get your ass to football camp. Move into the dorms and register for school. Don’t throw that shit away. Just do it. You can always quit later if it wasn’t the right decision.”

Ethan slumped where he stood as indecision colored his expression. “I love her, man. I always have, you know?”

“Yeah, I know,” Josh answered soberly.

Ethan shook his head and exhaled a mirthless laugh as he looked up and stared at Josh. “I don’t think you do. I’ve been hung up on her since I was … like fourteen or something. She was so pretty and right under my nose all the time. Hell, I remember feeling so damn guilty for having those kinds of thoughts about her.” He shook his head again at the memory. “Shit, Ty’s little sister. And now she’s pregnant with my baby.” He looked back over at Josh and a tormented expression came over his countenance. “I can’t lose her, man. I can’t. I’ll die, you know? It would fucking kill me.”

A strong surge of commiseration rose up within Josh. Yeah, he knew exactly what Ethan was talking about, because he felt like that about Hannah.

There had been a time when Josh hadn’t thought Ethan and Ava would make it, but the last few months their bond had grown and it was obviously to anyone around them that their love ran deep. “You won’t lose her. This is going to be rough; I’m not going to lie to you. But y’all will make it through it, and you’ll come out stronger on the other side. Just stay focused on the main goal, all right? I can’t tell you that I know exactly how you’re going to make the next four years work, but you’ll make it work, both of you. If it’s meant to be, you know? And dude, it is meant to be … that’s obvious.”

“Yeah.”

Josh turned and watched the first customer of the morning pull into the parking lot. “Look, I got to get to work … we can talk later, okay? Anything else I can do to help right now?” he asked.

“Nah. Thanks man. Thanks for listening to me, you know? Thanks for having my back.”

“Always, dude.”

“You can tell Hannah if you want.”

“I will if you want me to.”

“Yeah. She’ll know how to go about helping Ava. Emotionally, I mean. Ava wants Hannah to know, she’s just scared to tell her.”

“Okay. Good luck, man. I’ll catch up with you later.”

Josh gave Ethan a swift, hard hug and then turned away to walk into the feed store.

Chapter Thirteen

Josh decided to get it over with at lunch that day. He and Hannah were sitting at a park bench and he’d just devoured three sandwiches and five cookies that she’d made for him. Even her sandwiches tasted good. Knowing that she’d made them for him somehow made the food taste better.

He cleared his throat and ran his finger over the back of her hand. “I need to tell you something.”

Hannah heard the serious undercurrent in Josh’s voice and her gaze lifted from where their fingers were entwined. “What?”

“I don’t want you to feel bad because I’m the one telling you this, okay?”

Confusion and a mild sense of panic made her breathing shallow. “Okay.”

“Ava’s scared to tell you. I don’t know why exactly, maybe she doesn’t want to let you down. Because you’re her best friend and she loves you. “

Now panic in full force gripped Hannah. “What’s wrong with Ava?”

“Baby—”

“Tell me, Josh!”

“She’s pregnant.”

A coil of shock exploded in Hannah’s mind, immediately followed by pain. Pain, for her friend. “How long have you known?”

“Ethan told me this morning. He told me to tell you. Ava wants you to know.”

Hannah lunged from her sitting position on the bench. “I have to go to her.”

Josh grabbed her hand and pulled her to him. “Wait.”

“What?” Hannah asked.

Josh’s expression was tight. “I don’t know what the temperature will be like at her house. I don’t even know if Ty knows yet. Her parents want her to give the baby up for adoption, and Ava and Ethan don’t want to do that. They aren’t giving permission for her to get married.”

Abruptly, the severity of the situation hit Hannah. Shock was fast receding and the need for a clear head was taking its place. “Okay, I’ll be careful. I won’t say anything until she and I are alone.”

Josh spread his thighs and pulled her between his legs. Her hands landed on his shoulders and his dark green eyes stared intently up at her. “That can’t happen to you, Hannah. You can’t get pregnant.”

Hannah sucked in a breath and nodded. “I agree.”

His hand landed on her hip and rubbed gentle circles over the material of her shorts. “We can’t let anything get out of hand.”

“I know, you’re right.”

“That doesn’t mean that it’s not going to kill me.”

One side of her mouth lifted. “It won’t kill you.”

His eyes closed and he inhaled deeply. “I can stand it if you can stand it.”

Hannah smiled and wrapped her arms around him. She could stand anything as long as Josh belonged to her.

****

An hour later, Hannah encircled Ava in her arms while her friend cried her eyes out. Nobody was at home; Ava’s parents were both at work and Ty was at his summer job at the lumber supply store. The girls were shut away in Ava’s bedroom and Ava had been sobbing for a solid twenty minutes. Hannah was beginning to get worried about her. “Shhh.” She stroked her hands over Ava’s back in a soothing, circular pattern. “You’re going to make yourself sick. Please try to stop crying.”

Ava took a shuddering breath and her tears finally began to slow. She backed out of Hannah’s embrace and scrubbed at her face with her hands. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

Ava cleared her throat and got up from the bed and moved to the chair that sat in front of her desk. She sat down and took a huge breath. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

“Don’t worry about it. I know you weren’t trying to keep it a secret from me.”

“I know, but still. You’re my best friend and I should have—” Her words stopped as her voice became strangled with tears again.

“Ava, it’s okay. This isn’t about me.” Hannah studied Ava’s downcast features. “I’m here for you. To listen to you if you want to talk about it, or to take you shopping, or to sit in silence. Whatever you want.”

“Thanks.” Ava’s face began to crumple again, but with a look of sheer determination, she began breathing steadily and got herself under control. “Let’s talk about it, okay?”

“Sure.”

“My parents want me to give it up for adoption.”

Hannah felt her heart break in two at Ava’s anguished words. “What do you want to do?”

“Keep the baby and marry Ethan and live happily-ever-after. That’s my plan.”

Hannah smiled at the overly exaggerated simplicity of the explanation. “It’s settled, then. There’s no doubt in my mind that Ethan would marry you this afternoon.”

“Yeah, he would. He wants to.”

“I know, Josh told me.”

“He told you they won’t let me get married?”

“Yeah. They can’t make you give the baby away, can they?”

“No. But if I don’t act as if I’m going to do what they want, they won’t let me see Ethan anymore.”

“How are they going to stop you?”