Her face turned white. “Why do you ask such a thing?”
I shrugged. “I do not know. I wonder if, in some way, we each carry the burden of a secret or two. I know I do.”
Her eyes scanned the area around us before landing back on mine. “Yes, my dear girl. I carry a great burden. One which I wish to share with you… when the moment is right.”
A great sense of relief swept through my body, giving me a moment of reprieve from the unbearable heat. My mother intended to tell me the truth. But when? I feared my father already knew the truth—or, at the very least, suspected it. It would be foolish of me to alert my mother of the knowledge I carried. Not before my father was set to disembark from his ship. He would likely realize something was wrong.
“Now put a smile on your face, darling, for your father will be here at any moment. He will want a smile from both his girls.”
My stomach soured at my mother’s words. She turned and spoke with Mrs. Shaw once more.
“Your face is too beautiful to wear such an expression of sadness, Miss Soloman.” My heart skipped a beat at the sound of Jonathon Young’s voice. He leaned in closer—so close I could feel his warm breath upon my skin. Does he have no regard for propriety? “Or should I say… Miss Hathorne.”
Spinning around, I glared at him. “Dare I say you have some nerve, Mr. Young. Coming here before my father is to arrive to rattle me so.”
His dimples grew deep within his cheeks, and I fought to ignore the way his smile made my knees weak.
“I do believe that you are much too strong a woman to be rattled so. Of course, maybe you enjoy being rattled, Miss Soloman.”
I sighed heavily. “Quinn. Please call me Quinn.”
His blue eyes danced with excitement before dropping his gaze to my lips and licking his own in response. Why, Mr. Young is a flirt, indeed. “Quinn it is. Would it be too forward of me to ask to escort you home?”
My mouth went dry, and I attempted to swallow but struggled. “I’m in the company of my parents, Mr. Young.”
He chuckled. “Jonathon, please.”
Our conversation was lighter than it had been the night before. The air around us charged with something I had never experienced.
With a wide grin, I responded, “All right, Jonathon.”
He leaned his body in closer. “But Jon for when we are alone.”
My mouth fell open in surprise, and I quickly took a step back from the heat I felt from his body. “Dare I say you think mighty high of yourself, Jonathon, and very less of me if you think I would allow myself to be alone with you. Why, we are not even courting.”
Even though we were not courting, every inch of my body yearned to be alone with him. To feel his hands on my body. To pull from me the deep pleasures every woman longs for.
My mother never spoke of such things, even when I asked her about such feelings. My parents had always shown great restraint while making love in their own bedchambers for I’d never once heard them. A few months ago, desire must have taken over as I’d heard them in the carriage house as I’d made my way through to the stables. I had snuck out to spend time with my new horse. As I walked through the carriage house to the stables, I heard my mother moaning and my father grunting as they made love. I’d been horrified at intruding on such a private moment and quickly left before they realized I was there. I had been shocked, but intrigued, by her sounds of pleasure.
“My dear, you are lost in a memory,” Jonathon whispered against my ear before quickly retreating a step back lest anyone see him.
Thoughts of him making me feel what my mother had felt that night swirled around in my head. What in the world is happening to me? I was desiring things that I had never dreamed of until that moment. Desire to hear his name pulled from my lips in the heat of passion as I gave myself to him.
My hand covered my mouth when the realization hit me. Turning my head in my mother’s direction, my eyes widened in shock. In the urgent moment, I’d paid no attention to the name she’d called out in her passion. Now it was screaming over and over in my head so loudly I could not even hear my own breathing.
James.
The ground beneath me faltered, and I reached out my hand to steady myself.