Thoroughly Whipped

“It may have been expensive, Faith. But that bra is paying for itself!” Novah took a large sip of her Diet Coke, now mixed with the vodka I’d smuggled into the club.

“You’re telling me. But shit, I feel for women like you, Nove. These things weigh a ton. I can feel my spine bending irreparably as we speak.”

“I know. You may think I look good now, but come to me when I’m fifty and I’ll be answering the door like Quasimodo, nipples dragging along the floor. But instead of repeating the bells, the bells, it’ll be my tits, my tits!”

Laughing, I aimed for my drink, squeezing the hidden pouch lining my bra for the vodka that had gathered at the base. Someone tapped me on my shoulder, scaring the living shit out of me. I spun, still squeezing my tit, and shot a squirt of vodka straight into some poor guy’s eye.

“What the fuck!” he said, wiping the liquid from his face. I quickly fumbled with the bra’s pouch and tucked myself back in. “What the hell was that?” he asked, face reddening with disgust.

“She’s lactating, asshole,” Amelia said. “What do you think it was?” As I met her eyes, she grimaced and shrugged, mouthing, I didn’t know what else to say!

“Then why the fuck does it taste like vodka? Oh god!” he said, face paling. “I got it in my mouth!”

As he spat at the floor, Novah leaned forward over the table, affronted. “Listen, pal, you try raising a baby without alcohol. Don’t you dare judge a mother for doing the best she can!”

“Fuck this,” the guy said, walking away. “Bunch of freaks.”

“Oh my god!” Sage said and burst out laughing.

“Lactating?!” I said to Amelia.

“I panicked!” she said. “I’m not loud and feisty like you. I had to think on my feet! I didn’t want us to get thrown out!”

I was laughing so hard tears filled my eyes. “And Novah. Don’t judge a mother for doing the best she can! What the—?”

“He fucked off, didn’t he? Nothing like a whiff of eau de commitment to scare off the boys!”

I fixed the genius that was my vodka-smuggling bra, and we clanked our drinks and downed half our glasses.

“Shall we have this dance?” I asked my best friends. We moved to the dance floor, and I got lost in the pounding music. The beat pulsed in time with my heartbeat, my skin heated from the bodies swirling around us, brushing against my limbs, and I felt the day’s awful events slipping away.

A tall blond guy came toward me. He was good looking, and I smiled in encouragement. He would do nicely. It’d been a while since I’d lost myself dancing with a man, and even longer since I’d had a night between the sheets. I wrapped my arms around his neck, and our hips ground to the beat. Turning my back to his chest, I felt his hardness press against my ass.

Song after song rolled on, and the night was looking ever more promising. I lifted my hands in the air and placed them behind my partner’s neck; then I felt the hairs on the back of my neck rise. It was as though someone was watching me. I looked up, my eyes immediately seeking the VIP balcony…and my gaze crashed into a familiar blue stare.

The heat infusing my muscles instantly cooled. My body froze. The guy I’d been dancing with tried to keep me moving with his hands on my hips, but when I didn’t move, he walked away.

“Faith?” Amelia asked, pulling on my arm. “You okay?”

“Shit!” I said, my gaze still fixed on the balcony. “It’s Harry Sinclair.”

“What?” Amelia asked, confused.

“He’s here.”

Immediately all of my friends looked up at what held my attention. Harry rose from leaning on the balcony. He never moved his eyes off me, but without any form of greeting, he turned away and disappeared into the depths of the VIP area.

“Damn!” Sage said. “That guy is…” I glared at my friend, warning him with my laser eyes not to be complimentary. Sage shrugged. “Sorry, baby girl, but that guy is hot as fuck!”

“Ugh!” I said. “One night. I needed this one night to dance my problems away.” Feeling irritated beyond measure, I combed my fingers through my hair. “I’m going to the bathroom.”

“I’ll come,” Novah offered.

“No, it’s fine. I won’t be long. You guys keep dancing.” I weaved my way through the packed dance floor, heading for the bathrooms. I cut down the back hallway, turned right, and then smashed right into someone’s chest. “For fuck’s sake!” I screamed, stumbling backward and, in my quintessentially clumsy way, I landed firmly on my ass.

I stared at the ground and prayed a hole would cave under the tiles and swallow me right up. In my drunken state, I smacked the floor with my palm. “Come on, kraken! I’m waiting! You have a willing victim! And I’m juicy. Particularly my ass!”