Tonight, looking at her phone number in my phone all these years later brought back memories that didn’t necessarily improve my mood. She’d be married by now. Maybe even have a kid, too.
A hard run it was then.
That was what I needed to push the niggling out of my mind.
After that, well… I’d see who was in the hotel bar.
3
Quincey
I was annoyed.
I was annoyed Carl got made.
I was annoyed I had to leave my studio.
I was annoyed I’d been putting this meeting off for a full month but couldn’t any longer.
I didn’t want to see this guy.
I didn’t want to meet this guy.
I didn’t want anything to do with this guy, but Valerie was having none of it.
I was following her wishes, doing what she wanted. Though I hadn’t a clue why she was doing it this way.
She met the guy, hooked up with the guy, and here I was, giving him the 411? Me?
That wasn’t my job.
It wasn’t supposed to be my job. It was hers.
But, damn.
Maybe my anger wasn’t anger at all as a tear worked its way up my throat. I was not doing that shit. I couldn’t. Tightening my hands around the steering wheel, I forced that emotion to the bottom of my stomach, and I was hoping to wash it out of me forever. I would not could not break down now.
No way.
Not ever, to be honest.
Ring, ring.
I reached over to hit the accept button on my car and heard my dad’s voice come over the car’s speakers. “Are you there?”
I heard shrieking, followed by high-pitched giggling, and I automatically smiled. “Is that Nova?”
“It’s the kid I kidnapped on the way home from the bakery today.”
I flicked my eyes up, but I was relaxing. “Not funny, Duke.”
He was my father, but in so many ways, he wasn’t fatherly at all. I’d been calling him by his first name since I was ten years old. He never said a word about it, and neither did I. I was supposed to follow orders, and I had all my life, except now.
I wasn’t following his orders. I was following Val’s.
“Are you there yet?” he asked again.
“No. Not yet. But I’m not far.”
My hands tightened on the wheel once again, and just then, I turned the corner, and the hotel where he was staying came into view. The Corebar Hotel was small and exclusive and well-known among the famous and wealthy.
“I’m here.”
I was so tense.
I felt like two fists had been thrust into my stomach, holding my organs with a firm grip, and wouldn’t let go. And I wasn’t sure if I wanted them to let loose or just rip my organs out of me. It was an I-need-a-drink kinda feeling. A strong drink. I should have gotten trashed before I saw him.
I still could.
I wasn’t a drinker, never had been with what I did for my profession, but today was an exception. A very big exception. My body would forgive me eventually.
“How’s everything at home with Nova?” I needed a slight distraction.
“She’s good. You know Nova.”
Yeah, I did. And I loved her, so that was why I was doing what I was doing.
Emotion swept through me, causing my throat to close up. Again.
God. The breakdown.
No, no, no.
And I gripped that steering wheel like it was about to fall off. “It’s not fair.”
I waited, but he didn’t reply.
I knew he wouldn’t.
I could almost hear what he’d inevitably say because he’d said it so many other times.
Life wasn’t fair. There were winners and losers. If I didn’t want to be a loser, I needed to “buck up,” get my head on straight, and wage war with cold ruthlessness. It was better to keep walking over the bloodied corpses than to join them. And my father thought anyone who shed a tear deserved to be a bloodied corpse.
I never knew if he actually meant bloodied corpse as in dead people, but that was another topic—like how I called him Duke instead of Dad—that never got discussed.
I didn’t think I wanted to know how he would clarify that phrase.
Fucking dammit.
I’d gone the block and another.
I stifled a second curse. “There are no parking spots. I’m going to have to valet the car.”
He was quiet for a moment. “You do what you need to do. The nannies are here, so you stay as long as you need to get this done.”
“I know.”
I was mentally saluting him. When he said take my time, he meant it. I brought a bag even though we lived just outside the city. Nate Monson was staying at this hotel, so as long as it took, I would be here as well.
Pulling up to the front of the Corebar Hotel, I grabbed my purse first. I’d get the bag later if it was necessary. I was still hoping it was a last-ditch effort.