I didn’t know if he was listening. I didn’t think I was saying it for him, anyway.
“And I think if she hadn’t been with Nico when she found out she was pregnant, I think she would’ve told you.” I looked at him now. “I can’t help but wonder that if she had, would she be the one sitting here?”
A wave of sadness moved through me, but it was a good kind of sad. If that made sense? But to me, in that vehicle, feeling an uncharacteristic closeness to someone who was uncharacteristically placed in my life, it felt right at the same time to say all that I had.
And that right there made no sense to me.
I’d gone to a few football games in high school, but that’d been it. It wasn’t my sport, and it wasn’t my escape from Duke, so it ceased to be in my world. I was now remiss because I loved football. Though, maybe I loved attending a game with Nate?
We went in as normal fans, but Nate was getting recognized. Not a lot, but enough that he was getting more attention because of the initial attention. He moved, placing his hand on the small of my back, and he urged me in front of him. We were in the concessions line.
His head bent to mine. “Ignore the attention. It’s my relation to Blaise. No clue why these people loved him so much.”
I glanced but saw the faint grin on his face. “We should have more talks about your family.”
He glanced down at me.
“I know. I know. The PI file, so yes, I know the players, but those files don’t share everything.”
“Thank fuck for that.”
The line was moving at a good pace, and we only had six more people in front of us.
“What do you want to know?”
“Are you close to your brother-in-law?”
A wry laugh came from him as he reached for his wallet. Four people to go.
“Define close?” Another laugh, but this one sounded more wry. “Actually, I didn’t like the kid when I first met him, but he tends to grow on you. He treats my sister well, so that’s really all that matters.”
I was reading between the lines, and it seemed he adored his brother-in-law. “You love him, huh?”
His eyes lifted, and I saw I was right.
“Wait till you meet him. He’s a lot. You watch soccer?”
I shook my head. “No. It was only dancing for me.”
“Is that normal?”
“No. Well, sometimes. It can be. I chose to really immerse myself. It’s competitive the higher you go, and you can’t lose the edge, ever. I know a lot of dancers who aren’t like that, though. They live normal lives with families.”
“I get it. I think. I was shipped off to a private boarding school for a bit, so I get that world.”
“You were shipped off?”
His eyes were lidded. “My parents didn’t approve of my friends’ influence on me.”
“Did they have a right to be worried?”
Two people to go.
One.
He grunted. “Yes, but also no. It didn’t deter me from leaving as soon as I could and then still getting in trouble with those friends afterward.” His eyes grew distant.
It was our turn, and feeling his gaze weighing on me, I stepped to the counter, giving my order. Nate was next, and I didn’t fight him when he moved to pay. I’d been living with him long enough to know he was going to pay no matter what. He just did it.
After getting our drinks and food, we moved through a large crowd of people. He shifted again, stepping behind me. He had the majority of the food, but he still managed to clear a hand to rest on my back.
It was doing all sorts of things to me.
My stomach was flip flopping all over inside.
I was attracted to Nate. I’d always been attracted to him, but that attraction was almost out of control by now.
I needed to rein it in and deal with it.
Once we were through that group, there was a slight clearing of people. Nate moved back to my side. His eyes grew fierce. “Since we talked about my parents before, I need you to know that I will never be like that with Nova. I’ll never ship her away. I’ll never feel like she’s a mistake. I’ll always love her and put her first.”
Heat filtered through me because he wasn’t just letting me know he’d always be in Nova’s life. I was getting that. I got that message loud and clear the first moment I told him about her. He was telling me something else.
My mouth dried.
He was going to be a good father.
Correction, an amazing father.
My stomach shifted, and I felt an opening forming in the middle of my chest.
Dear Lord.
That made me even more attracted to him.
I whispered, “Just don’t be like my father.”