“You know round, square, diamond or that umm I don’t know… What kind do you like? Do they make ovals?” I have no clue about the names, but I hear that some women like different cuts and shit. Fuck.
“What the fuck are you talking about?”
“Fuck it!” I say and put the truck into reverse. “I have a better idea.”
“What the hell are you doing?” she asks me as I get a big smile on my face.
I drive through the night, out to the strip, to where everything is available and ready for instant gratification. I head to the jewelry shop that I got mom stuff with my dad for her birthday. I am sure they will have what she wants.
Mandy is quiet as she watches the road ahead of us, then she turns to me and says, “Are you okay?”
“Yep. Trust me.”
“I didn’t break you did I?”
I look over to her and snicker, “No, but I am going to break you soon enough.” She looks even more confused when I wink.
We pull in front of the jewelry store and I smile. Yep, open 24-hours a day. They have to be in this town, what with all the wedding chapels around.
I hop out of the truck and walk around to her side, opening the door.
Shaking her head at me she asks, “What are we doing here?”
I reach in and unbutton her belt and take her hand and gently pull her out of the truck. She climbs down and stands there, looking up at me with worry and confusion clear on her face.
Leaning down, I put my hand behind her head and pull her close, kissing her with a great deal of gentle care. She could be pregnant; I do not want her scared or hurting right now. That’s not a good way to get her to marry me.
Shaking her head, she pushes me away from her and my heart all but crumbles into the dark despair I felt so many years ago. Fuck. This is not how I want to feel right now, and I do not want her to say no, not now. I just got her back.
“No, we can’t do this. If you are doing what I think you want to do, we can’t do this.”
“What the fuck do you mean? I love you, you love me and we are going to have a child. I don’t care if we don’t have one either. You’re mine. You had your chance to end this long ago, now it’s my turn. You’re mine.” I say with a lot of feeling, I cannot let her go again.
“It’s too fast and too soon. You’re just stressed and I am stressed, we have no clue what’s going to happen. Neither of us are in the right mind right now.”
Her words have meaning, just not for me.
“I’m not stressed, I am clear-headed. Maybe I was while I was waiting for you in the parking lot, which I really don’t think I will do again. I want to have a baby with you. I want to be with you. I have loved since before you even knew who I was. Now I want to marry you. This isn’t really that complicated.”
Is she just being fucking dense with me on purpose, testing my fucking resolve? Fuck, does she not even understand what a fighter like me goes through on a fucking daily basis? My will and my resolve are not fucking bending on this.
I then say as she opens her mouth to speak, “I was nervous in the car. I had the twitches and foot jitters. Just like before a fight. Now, I am crystal clear, Mandy. I love you. I want you as my wife and the mother of my horde of children we will be having.”
And now she bursts into fucking tears. Fuck my goddamn mouth, did I fuck up?
I pull her into my chest as she sobs and babbles to me, snot and tears soaking my shirt.
“But I left you!” she wails and clutches at my shirt. Every other word comes out as a gasp, and from what I gather she starts to talk about her parents bullying her into leaving me. I get mad, and I get mad at them… A few of those old wounds make more sense.
“I wanted to come back…but I couldn’t afford it. I tried to call… but you never answered. The more time passed, the harder it was to come back. But now I’m back, completely broke and a failure. You stick your dick in me one time and now you want to marry me! We can’t do this!”
“We sure as fuck can!” I say back to her. “Fuck them and fuck what we can’t or shouldn’t do. Do you love me?” I ask.
“Yes! But I might not even be pregnant. I just had my period and we won’t even be able to tell for like two or three more weeks. You don’t have to marry me just because you think you knocked me up.”
“I don’t care even if I didn’t knock you up. I am going to knock you up as soon as possible and get you in the kitchen!”
Her jaw drops, yeah I have that effect on women sometimes.